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How to be a modern day snake oil salesman...

May 3, 2007 11:15 AM

...charge the City of Columbus $125,000 to tell them how to appeal to "young professionals."  Meet Rebecca Ryan, CEO of Next Generation Consulting:

Graphics lit up behind her on a gigantic projection screen as she launched into her enthusiastic spiel.

First was a brief glossary of terms and acronyms, from the ever-popular DINKS (double income, no kids) to the less uplifting BASICS (bachelor of arts still in customer service).

Then she introduced the Power Clap.

If you think a Power Clap is just a bunch of loud applause, well, that’s why you’ll never work with a young professional. It involves everyone in the room clapping at once—but only once. CLAP. That’s it.

Sound more like crap than clap, if you ask me.  So what sort of substantive advice did Ms. Ryan provide to the City of Columbus? 

Coleman and Marsh, the mayor’s former chief of staff, said Ryan earned her paycheck by providing the city with intangible commodities such as focus, commitment and validation.

Wow.  Commodities so intangible, they're worthless.  "Focus, commitment and validation."  It really is crap not clap!

And get this: The advice she gave to Columbus?  The exact same advice she gave to Akron.

Yes.  Akron.

Comments

...which is also the same advice she gave Canton, which is also the same advice....

This lady's got quite a racket going. I'm in the wrong line of work!

Kevin LeMaster   ·  May 6, 2007 03:49 PM

She must be the one who sold Cleveland on the CLEVELAND+ promotion. Get this... the promotion is based on this concept: if you select Cleveland you not only get all the wonderful attributes of such a fine city, you are also gaining access to Youngstown,Akron, and Canton! Just makes you want pack all your things in the old 1989 Aerostar and head North.

Butters   ·  May 9, 2007 07:49 PM

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