Nasty, Brutish & Short

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And from the "why didn't another loved one step in and stop this" file...

December 12, 2007 11:13 AM

...we have this obituary from Sunday's New Orleans Times-Picayune, which was "composed, written, and submitted by [the decedent's grieving widow]. All thoughts, opinions and declarations in it are ENTIRELY hers and do not reflect input from any other persons, LIVING OR DEAD:"

EVANICK Robert Bruce Evanick (always known as Bruce to those who loved him - and those who employed him and exploited his work ethic) -- died Tuesday afternoon, December 4th, 2007. A massive heart attack killed him - despite the heroic efforts of many physicians, surgeons and nurses - in a waiting area at Ochsner Hospital. He was not an inpatient there. He was there to provide company and comfort to Brenda, his wife, whom he loved and supported, in all ways, for 32 years. Her heart is broken. He died a horrendous death, on the floor of the waiting room, at Brenda's feet. To her, he was the most kind, most gentle, and most generous person she has ever known. His death should be a warning to all those who believe that they are being used by insensitive employers. He deserved better, both in life and death. Bruce had been seduced into a sedentary and high stress life style after he moved to New Orleans by the promise of "big money" from a corporate defense law firm. Essentially, his succumbing to that seduction and his devotion to duty caused his death. Of the many shareholders in the firm for which he labored, only one took the personal initiative to call Brenda to offer her personal condolences.

Oh my.  But enough about his job, tell us about his personal life!

Several colleagues believe that Brenda and Bruce were divorced. This is not true. They lived apart for several years but were in friendly communication, especially enjoying Sunday breakfasts together....

And his passions!  What were his passions?!?

Bruce was brilliantly intelligent, with an impressive knowledge of the law and many other disciplines. Bruce's encyclopedic knowledge of sterling silver -- including the most rare and sought after makers and patterns - put him far above the average collectors. He also knew textiles intimately, including old and new quilts, embroideries from ancient to modern, laces, silks, and all forms of the highest quality handwork in fabric and thread. His appreciation of textiles included loving the custom made shirts that Brenda designed and constructed for him....

Talking about how much the decedent appreciated your own talents.  Not good for an obituary.  And why bring up the endanged Rothschilds Mynah birds?  Or the bromeliads?  The goldfish pond?  The what you say?  Well, here:

While residing in York, PA, Bruce was very much involved in the care of a large collection of exotic birds that he and Brenda collected and kept and propagated. They received permission from the federal government to keep and attempt to propagate the crucially endangered Rothschilds Mynahs. Bruce and Brenda succeeded in raising four Rothschilds (Bali) Mynahs, hand-feeding them from the day they hatched in an incubator. They also raised hundreds of rare and delicate finches and softbilled birds and exhibited them all across the USA. They won many awards, including "Exhibitor of the Year" and "Outstanding Grassroots Activist" awards for supporting the captive breeding programs for rare and endangered species. They expanded that loving care into founding and operating a wild bird rescue agency that treated and released native wild birds that had been orphaned or injured. They released many hundreds of them back to the wild. That organization still flourishes and serves today in the care of dear friends of Bruce and Brenda. While still in Pennsylvania, Bruce became a successful gardener. He expanded that knowledge and skill in Louisiana. With Brenda he amassed a collection of rare orchids, ferns, ivies and bromeliads that comprise a lush garden at their Algiers Point home. Bruce had a fabulous goldfish pond built for Brenda as a birthday gift and it still sparkles and gurgles in their garden. Bruce's death leaves a huge void in the world. It is truly a sin and a shame that only one of his fellow shareholders were moved to personally console his widow.

I think, what she's trying to say is, is that only one of his fellow shareholders called her after he died, and that she would have appreciated it if more had done so.  So what's she going to do about it?

He loved her to his last breath and would have been deeply saddened by their cold attitude. Bruce is survived by two siblings from whom he was estranged. [ed. an estrangement which, I am sure, the author of the obit played no role in, whatsoever]. The firm will be holding a Memorial Service in their office sometime on Monday, December 10, 2007. It is not known if they would welcome people from outside the firm and the firms prestigious client list. Brenda will not attend.

But it would have been quite interesting, if she had.   

She wraps it all up with a little too much information:

Bruce has been cremated and his remains will be placed in an exquisite wooden box which he loved and will remain with his grieving widow.

Emphasis added (not that it was needed).  HT: Above the Law

Comments

Oh. My. God.

Anonymous   ·  December 12, 2007 11:55 AM

I hope in her eulogy, she says what she really thinks.

Gold Mug   ·  December 12, 2007 12:07 PM

I'm guessing there was no other loved one around to put a stop to this because that crazy bitch alienated him from his family and turned him gay, gay. gay. Wouldn't you rather pack fudge and tend your Mynah birds than listen to her?

Anonymous   ·  December 12, 2007 12:59 PM

Do not speak ill of the dead!

Walleye   ·  December 12, 2007 02:03 PM

I'm truly stunned by this level of narcissism. Did Bruce do anything at all, even go the bathroom, without Brenda? I was surprised to get to the end and not read that she's planning to sue the members of the firm who didn't call her to personally offer condolences.

Dr. Mabuse   ·  December 21, 2007 02:47 PM