Nasty, Brutish & Short

Celebrities Archives

The Blogging Blondes. Much to my complete surprise, I know them.

July 8, 2008 09:19 PM

Well, one of them anyway.

I got a text from a mutual friend yesterday, all "you have to turn on the homer right now!" So I did. Since it was the radio, it took me a minute to figure it out. Especially because the blogging blonde was not blonde the last time I saw her. She looked better brunette, but I have to say, the new color suits her personality better.

I think the most amusing thing is, they aren't even blogging.

The Governator Calls Mitt Romney

January 22, 2008 11:19 AM

Prank calls. Who doesn't love a good prank call?

Also, correct me if I'm wrong, but wouldn't it be pretty easy to get Mitt's cell phone number off of this tape?

Pop quiz. Sharon Stone's catsuit is __________.

January 18, 2008 12:34 PM

Just right...


Too tight?

The Candidates' Homes, an NBS Tour

January 17, 2008 02:59 PM

Of course, Mother Jones put these photos up because they want you to think we're ruled by monied, hypocritical, gas guzzling aristocrats, no matter which party wins.  I'm putting them up because real estate is porn for married people.  So let's begin!

Here's Huckabee's house.  Not surprisingly, the candidate that I like the least has the house I like the least.  It's weighs in at 5,124 square feet, with a deck and a swimming pool.  It's also boring, and has atrocious landscaping:


Here's Rudy's pad in New York.  I really can't relate to it, but it's got a Walnut-paneled dining room and a cigar room.  I don't smoke, but I like the sound of that.  There's no rule that says you can't use your cigar room as a drinking room.


The McCains do the tall building thing too, but theirs is a $4.7 mill condo in Phoenix.  They also have a ranch in Sedona, which was profiled in Home & Garden.  I think I also saw it in Architectural Digest a few years ago.  It was nice.  Better than their condo, anyway:


Turning for a minute to the other side of the aisle, here's Hill and Bill's place in Westchester County.  I have no problems with it, and it certainly comports with whatever their pollster told them to buy.  I just wonder if they've ever seen it themselves?


Can't you just feel the love radiating off of the Clinton's house?  You know it's just a place of intimate diners for two, and passionate, romantic interludes.  When Hillary's in D.C.

The Obamas' place in Chicago is also nice.  And, it has a 1,000 bottle wine cellar.  Me like the sound of that!  Party at the Obamas!  They need to learn to bring the trash cans back up promptly though.  How rude.


You've already heard me opine in the hideousness of the Edwards home in North Carolina.  It is too big (21,000 square feet).  And it has an indoor basketball court.  They also have a beach house in North Carolina.  Presumably it's more suitable to his "Two Americas" crap than this is:


Here's one that's big and tasteful.  It's the Romney's ski retreat in Park City, Utah.  Looks like a house the Bushes would own.  Mitt has residences in several states, I believe.  Mrs. Romney must do a lot of dusting.  Of course, when you don't smoke or drink, what else is there to do?


NBS is ready to call the winner in the taste department, though.  This is the Thompsons' house in McLean, Virginia.  A seven bedroom, five bath stunner with a real Presidential air.



At long last, the details on the Kucinich UFO sighting

January 2, 2008 02:22 PM

I've been interested in this ever since Shirley MacLaine chimed in last fall, and said that Dennis Kucinich had seen a UFO in the backyard of her house.  He's refused to give us the details, but now we've got 'em, thanks to the intrepid reporters at The Wall Street JournalThey spoke to the others who were there, Paul Costanzo, "a Juilliard-trained trumpet player and jujitsu black belt, who worked as Ms. MacLaine's assistant, personal trainer and bodyguard," and Mr. Costanzo's then-girfriend.

Ms. MacLaine was up performing her one woman show in Canada at the time, and wasn't home.  Dennis was living at her house, though, writing his memoirs after Clevelanders voted him out of office after one term as Mayor.  So it was just the three of them.  You know, hanging out at Shirley's place.

Anyway, back to the story:

The day was strange from the start. For hours, Mr. Kucinich, Mr. Costanzo and his companion noticed a high-pitched sound. "There was a sense that something extraordinary was happening all day," says the girlfriend. She and Mr. Costanzo say that none of the three consumed alcohol or took drugs.

As they sat down to a dinner, Mr. Kucinich spotted a light in the distance, to the left of Mount Rainier. Mr. Costanzo thought it was a helicopter.

But Mr. Kucinich walked outside to the deck to look through the telescope that he had bought Ms. MacLaine as a house gift. After a few minutes, Mr. Kucinich summoned the other two: "Guys, come on out here and look at this."

Mr. Costanzo and his girlfriend joined Mr. Kucinich, where they took turns peering through the telescope. What they saw in the far distance, according to both witnesses, was a hovering light, which soon divided into two, and then three.

After a few minutes, the lights moved closer and it became apparent that they were actually three charcoal-gray, triangular craft, flying in a tight wedge. The girlfriend remembers each triangle having red and green lights running down the edges, with a laser-like red light at the tail. Mr. Costanzo recalls white lights, but no tail.

Mr. Costanzo says each triangle was roughly the size of a large van, while his former girlfriend compares it to a "larger Cessna, smaller than a jet certainly." Neither recalls seeing any markings, landing gear, engines, windows or cockpits.

The craft approached to within 200 yards, suspended over the field just beyond the swimming pool. Both witnesses say it emitted a quiet, throbbing sound -- nothing like an airplane engine.

"There was a feeling of wanting to communicate something, but I didn't know what," says Mr. Costanzo.

The craft held steady in midair, for perhaps a minute, then sped away, Mr. Costanzo says. "Nothing had landed," he says. "No strange beings had disembarked. No obvious messages were beamed down. When they were completely out of sight, we all looked at each other disbelieving what we had seen."

At Mr. Kucinich's suggestion, they jotted down their impressions and drew pictures to memorialize the event. Mr. Kucinich kept the notes, according to Ms. MacLaine, who said he promised her recently that he would try to find them.

"It was proof to me that we're obviously not alone," says the girlfriend.

The next day, the group spotted what they thought to be military helicopters buzzing around the valley where they had made the sighting. And the high-pitched sound remained.

Mr. Kucinich called Ms. MacLaine in Canada to tell her what had happened. "He said it was beautiful, serene, and it moved him," says Ms. MacLaine, who is supporting Mr. Kucinich's candidacy. "He was not afraid of it, let's put it that way. Seeing something that close and sophisticated and gentle."

Ms. MacLaine says she has seen UFOs from a distance in New Mexico and Peru, but never up close. She was envious. "I'm the one who reports them, but they never make close visitation. What am I doing wrong?"

What is she doing wrong, indeed?

Also, where are those notes?  Dennis promised Shirley recently that he would try to find them.  Why doesn't he get on that?

And what about this:

Ms. MacLaine says she called Mr. Kucinich before she included his UFO sighting in her book, "Sage-ing while Age-ing," a recounting of her spiritual and professional journeys. "I can handle it," she says he told her.

Talk about things you can say when you know your Presidential campaign is going nowhere.  Here's how I imagine that conversation going down:

Drrrrrring.  Drrrrrrrrring.  [phone ringing].

Dennis:  "Howdy ho!"

Shirley: "Hey Denny it's Shirls."

Dennis: "Haaaaay Shirls!!!!"

Shirley: "Your voice.  Dennis.  God, I miss you.  When you need me in New Hampshire, I'm there for you."

Dennis: "I need to check with Elizabeth."

Shirley: "LOVE that girl.  You know Den, I was thinking..."

Dennis: "Talk to me Shirls!  Talk to me!"

Shirley: "...remember when you were staying with me twenty five years ago..."


Shirley: "Well I was just down in Peru looking at cave art drawn here five million years by Our Friends and was thinking about that time you were at my house with Pauly and his girl, and you all had that special experience."


Shirley:  "Dennis! (giggles)  I'm talking about the time you saw The Ship!  I was wondering if I could put that in my new book, Sage-ing While Age-ing."

Dennis: "Oh what the hell.  Why not."

Shirley: "Wonders, Den.  Wonders.  You're the best!  Hugs and kisses to Elizabeth!"


The paps confront a pregnant Jamie Lynn...

December 24, 2007 10:18 AM

Why it is very important to be honest with your attorneys...

December 21, 2007 01:06 PM

Here we have Jamie Lynn Spears' attorneys, threatening to sue the National Enquirer for reporting a few months ago that Ms. Spears is pregnant:

 “Ms. Spears is a devout Christian with a spotless reputation, who lives in accordance with the highest moral and ethical standards in accordance with her faith.

There is no “rumor” concerning Ms. Spears’ (non-existent) pregnancy, except perhaps for the baseless “rumor” just now being created by the National Enquirer.

Ms. Spears is not pregnant. It is pathetic for the National Enquirer to attempt to create a wholly baseless “rumor” that Ms. Spears is pregnant, so it can run a malicious story and false story which would be emotionally devastating to a morally upright 16 year old girl.”

Which lead the National Enquirer to leak the Spears threat letter to Perez Hilton, who published it with unhesitant glee.  Hilarious.

Ike Turner

December 13, 2007 04:36 PM

Tina got beat again.

And now, the latest in our series: "Things you do not tell the judge."

November 10, 2007 07:29 AM

"You are not a pop star with a number one album, so you don't know."

--Britney Spears' lawyer, Anne Kiley, explaining to the Court why Britney missed 8 of 14 phone calls demanding she report for court-ordered drug testing.

HT: Althouse

And now, we know how he died.

October 11, 2007 03:26 PM

Who, you ask?  Count Gottfried Alexander Leopold Graf von Bismarck-Schonhausen!  We profiled his obituary back in July, because it began as few obituaries do:

Count Gottfried von Bismarck, who was found dead on Monday aged 44, was a louche German aristocrat with a multi-faceted history as a pleasure-seeking heroin addict, hell-raising alcoholic, flamboyant waster and a reckless and extravagant host of homosexual orgies.

It's an awful lot to put on a tombstone, but at least he managed to get in in the first sentence of his Telegraph obit.  And back in July, NBS commeter Dr. Mabuse asked, "But what did he die of?"  And now we know.  He'd injected himself with cocaine once an hour, for 24 hours.

And on a totally unrelated sidenote: This does kind of remind me of the time the Enquirer was interviewing my mom for my grandmother's obit and the reporter had never heard of "Vassar."  We still shake our heads in wonder over that.  [A weird obituary story is the only link between my grandmother and Count Gottfried von Bismark, lest you be wondering how he put me in mind of her.  She was not flamboyant waster or a reckless and extragagant host of homosexual orgies.  Well, not unless you count the times she'd have in her antiques appraiser.  That always got pretty crazy.]

Awwwww. I've found the NBS parenting model.

September 21, 2007 08:33 AM

Idiots Delight, Wednesday Edition: The ladies of The View discuss--in all seriousness--whether the earth is round. And at the very end, Barbara Walters is EXTREMELY confused about the internet and where babies come from.

September 19, 2007 10:25 AM

Wherein I have a rare moment, and am actually proud to be an Episcopalian

September 18, 2007 03:13 PM

Because no Episcopalian would EVER have one of these.  They are Inspirational Catholic Jesus Sports Statues, and they are available for $22.95 from








 describes them as "a wonderful way to reinforce Jesus "as friend" in everyday activities."  But I don't think Jesus should be helping that little girl with her golf swing. 

Nor do I think he should be teaching these little boys to play football in flip-flops.













"What a friend we have in Jesus.  Tackle him!" 

Oh sure, my Church may be run by hippies and heretics, but at least we don't have Inspirational Jesus Sports Statues.  What happened to the idea that you built things like this to remind people about Jesus?

West end of Chartres

HT the Llama Butchers.

Patricia Heaton for President!

She responds to Sally Field's ridiculous Emmy Award speech “If mothers ruled the world, there wouldn’t be any god-damned wars in the first place,” thusly:

“I’ve actually become a more violent person since I became a mother, If someone came between me and my kids, they’d be dead meat. So I didn’t agree with that particular statement.”

Leona Helmsley's Will Confirms She Was "Trouble"

August 29, 2007 08:12 AM

She left $12,000,000 to her dog, a white Maltese named "Trouble."  At the end of his life, "Trouble" is to be buried in the Helmsley mausoleum, next to Leona and Harry.  She gave $5,000,000 to two of her grandchildren, as long as they visit their father's grave site at least once a year.  If they don't, they get nothing.  Oh, and the other two grandchildren?  They get nothing, "for reasons that are known to them."

I suppose I should also point out that the balance of her estate is to be given to her charitable trust.  That could be billions that she's leaving to charitable causes.  But it's also no excuse for so rudely and publically screwing over two of your grandchildren--"for reasons that are known to them." 

Does anyone actually believe the two screwed over grandchildren were responsible for whatever happened between them and their grandmother?

Hollywood Hates

August 24, 2007 10:23 AM

An entry, from Melissa Etheridge's partner's blog:

so if i blog
about what an idiotic, parasitical, country-raping piece of shit george w. bush is, i could
go to jail?

george bush
you are a criminal
you are raping our country of our intentions
i do wonder if his mom and dad go to bed at night
proud of little whiskey-cokey-georgie poo
his dictatorship?
how does laura lay her head down at night
pulled eyes and all
and dream sweetly of lambies and cashmere sweaters?
when she f**** him
does she call him adolf or castro?

you sweaty little piggish oompa loompa elmer fudd ass
karma is a bitch
and i don't think you'll ever get
that wascaly wabbit
while torturing the fellas at abu gharib

this war is
war for profit
something i am sure
the bible does not favor

weapons of mass destruction:
the current american government.

now come arrest me
you f*ckers.

And the Hollywood left thinks Republicans are the ones with the problems?

Bette Midler, one of Hollywood's most prominent "environmentalists"...

August 22, 2007 12:26 PM to be fined for cutting down more than 230 trees on her estate on Kauai.  She also had a road built without obtaining necessary permits.  Reminds me of John Travolta.

Evil, leg-breaking Steelers must be in bed by 11:00, and no drinky-poo

August 15, 2007 09:07 AM

The Smoking Gun has obtained the Pittsburgh Steelers' 2007 "Hotel Requirements."  Among the highlights:

No other hotel guests on the players' floor.

No alcohol in hotel rooms; mini-bars are NOT to be stocked.

No room service delivery of alcohol.

Hotel security is needed to assist with "bed check."

Players are not permitted phone calls after 11:00 p.m.

Hmmmm.  Why do they have to try so hard to prevent drinking, raping and pillaging?

Michael Vick: The other shoe drops!

July 30, 2007 11:13 AM

In the form of this pro se lawsuit, filed last week by Jonathan Lee Riches, Inmate No. 42948-018.  He seeks $63,000,000,000 "backed by gold and silver."  He alleges that Michael Vick stole his pit bulls, his identity (and used it to by dogfood) and his copyright.  And check out Count IV.  That one's a doozy.

 Michael Vick Pro Se 1 Abovethelaw Above the Law blog.jpg



HT: Above the Law

Airhead TV

July 26, 2007 09:45 AM

Remember Pearl the two-year old landlord? There are out takes...

July 11, 2007 08:35 AM

The Landlord Out Takes

Dr. McChild-Baker

June 19, 2007 04:19 PM

From the Enquirer:

DEERFIELD TWP. -- A man who drives a yellow Porsche sports car with the vanity license plate, “KEPT GUY,” is accused of leaving two small children locked inside the car on a hot afternoon.

Jeff Betts, 41, was charged with child endangering, authorities said today, following an incident Friday at a hardware store.

He told police that he went inside the Lowe’s store on Mason-Montgomery Road for only a few minutes, a Warren County Sheriff’s report says.

But deputies told him that the car could become dangerously hot rather quickly because of Friday’s temperatures in the 90s.

After attempts to rouse the children with knocks on the window, a deputy broke a window and freed the children. Paramedics examined the two girls, ages 2 and 4, and found they were uninjured.

A police report says Betts is a self-employed physician.

He was arrested at the scene and later released.

Don't the folks at the Enquirer even read themselves?  From John Kiesewetter's Enquirer blog on November 10, 2006...

Are you looking at the real Dr. McDreamy?
Dr. Jeff Betts, a pediatric interventional radiologist at Children's Hospital Medical Center, is one of 10 semifinalists in the "Access Hollwood" contest, "Are You The Real Dr. McDreamy?"
Dr. Betts' two-minute video entry, submitted by a coworker, will air on "Access Hollywood" at 7 p.m. today (Ch. 5). It also will be posted on after 4:30 p.m. today.
Two contestant videos will be posted and televised today. Viewers will chose one of the two docs, who will advance to the final five late next week.
Voting opens at 4:30 p.m. today, and runs through 1 p.m. Saturday. The winner will be announced on the 7 p.m. Monday show.

Sadly, I can't find the video he his "co-worker" submitted to Access Hollywood.  But still, wouldn't this bit of color enliven the whole "I left my kids to bake in the Porsche" story that the Enquirer ran with today in the online edition?

Perhaps they'll pick up on this before they go to print.

UPDATE:  The Enquirer has updated their story to include my Access Hollywood scoop.  Among the other revelations... the Dr.'s Porsche vanity plate used to say "HUGE EGO," and that was shown in his Access Hollywood video, which apparently also showed him stripping his scrubs to reveal him wearing a speedo.  He left the employ of Children's Hospital a week after the show aired, and now is "self-employed."

Hence there vanity plate revision to "Kept Guy"?

Paglia on the Democrats, Gore and Young Hollywood

June 13, 2007 08:21 AM

Camille Paglia is out with another profoundly insightful essay on American culture and politics.  After watching the Democratic debates, she suggests that her party may be in trouble:

Despite numerous polls claiming that registered Democrats like myself are happy with their current field of presidential contenders, the Gore boomlet betrays subterranean tremors of doubt. After two major televised debates by both parties, only a Pollyanna on helium would believe that any of the top-tier Democrats will definitely be able to defeat a leading Republican like Mitt Romney or Rudy Giuliani.

But, she explains, Gore is not the answer:

As a global warming agnostic, I dislike the way that Gore's preachy, apocalyptic fundamentalism has fomented an atmosphere of hysteria around this issue and potentially compromised the long-term credibility of environmentalism. Democrats who long for his return as the anti-Hillary may not realize how Gore has become a risible cartoon character for much of the country at large. Anyone who listens to talk radio has been repeatedly regaled by clips of Gore bizarrely going off the deep end at one speech or another. And Gore, far worse than Hillary, is the Phantom of a Thousand Accents -- telegraphing his supercilious condescension to whatever audience he's trying to manipulate.

And her armchair psyschological quarterbacking of young Hollywood is dead on:

What links the Lohan and Hilton cases is the weird behavior of the parents -- either flaky and dysfunctional or overbearing and coddling. The Lohan and Hilton mothers seem to reject aging by trying to keep their daughters in developmental limbo. Paris in particular seems to have become a psychic prisoner, turned into a flash-frozen marzipan doll by her belligerently benevolent mom. Neither family is typical, of course, but are the Hiltons exposing an unhealthy symbiosis in recent American family life? Adulthood keeps getting postponed for white middle-class girls, who even after they arrive at college are obsessively linked by umbilical cellphones to their hovering parents, who want to shield their progeny from all of life's nicks and scrapes.

Camille Paglia is the only reason Salon is worth reading.

Paris on the phone with Baba Wawa

June 11, 2007 08:21 AM

Paris's mom was on the phone with Barbara Walters when Paris called in from jail.  And Paris ends up on the phone with Barbara Walters.  That doesn't sound like a p.r. stunt at all!

Paris tells Baba:

I used to act dumb," she told Walters in the exclusive phone conversation. "That act is no longer cute.  Now, I would like to make a difference. ... God has given me this new chance."

Get that?  "God has given me a new chance."  I'm with Ann Althouse:

"I just hope this making a difference business doesn't involve adopting children or letting us know what's wrong with the government."

But chances of that are pretty good, aren't they?  Are we ready for Paris as the moral arbiter?

Paris Hilton issues statement upon entering jail

June 5, 2007 12:15 PM

She says: "In the future, I plan on taking more of an active role in the decisions I make."

She's a smart one, that girl.

Pete Rose's Persecutor's Secretary is a Hooker! Allegedly!

May 18, 2007 02:51 PM

Remember John Dowd, the D.C. attorney, investigator, and author of the Dowd Report--which secured Pete Rose's lifetime ban from baseball?

Well, he's back in the news.  It turns out that the alleged D.C. madam who has been in the news of late had an "employee" who worked as Dowd's secretary at Akin Gump, the prestigious D.C. law firm.

Will he forgive her if she admits it and apologizes?  And which does he think is worse... hooking or betting on baseball?

Local WASP's battle with Anne Heche is getting ugly... reports:

In court papers earlier this month in Los Angeles County Superior Court, Coley Laffoon is asking a judge for joint custody of the couple's 5-year-old son Homer, but claims that Anne's "bizarre and delusional behavior" and "poor parenting skills" could be a problem. In the papers, Laffoon claims that Anne once didn't put Homer in a car seat, she often cusses in front of the child, and packed school lunches that Homer "did not like." Laffoon added that his prior experience as a nanny and a summer camp counselor justify giving him joint custody.

I don't know why he's focused on the car seat and un-tastey lunches when he's in a custody battle with someone who wrote an autobiography called "Call Me Crazy."  That book pretty much documents her mental instability, including her battles with her alter ego, "Celestia" and her attempted rendez-vous in the desert with a space ship. Word on the street here has always been that Coley's parents were mortified that he married the deranged ex-girlfiend of one of the world's most prominent lesbians.  But, I've also been told Anne always behaved herself and was perfectly nice while in town for family functions.

But anyway, back to TMZ.  They say a rep for Heche has fired back:

It is disappointing that Coley Laffoon has resorted to filing lies with the court because Anne would not cave in to his astronomical monetary demands, including his demand for $45,000 a month in support. For the past several years, the child's father has refused to get a job in order to contribute financially to the child's care.

Ouch.  No job, Coley?

Flashback: How a Real Leader Starts a Ballgame

April 3, 2007 04:29 PM

John Travolta Speaks Out Against Global Warming

March 30, 2007 12:25 PM

He says we need to starting thinking about colonizing other planets and building "dome cities."

Dome cities!

"It [global warming] is a very valid issue," Travolta declared. "I'm wondering if we need to think about other planets and dome cities.

"Everyone can do their bit. But I don't know if it's not too late already. We have to think about alternative methods of fuel.

Here is John Travolta's house in Florida:

 John Travolta

Everyone do their bit to help, now!

Wanted: A Life for this Chubby Chick

March 20, 2007 12:49 PM

How can I be expected to write a Motion for Summary Judgment under these circumstances!!!

February 8, 2007 04:45 PM

Anna Nicole Smith is dead!

UPDATE: Gawker reports on how, in the moments following her death, Anna Nicole's Wikipedia entry was rudely defaced:

On February 8, 2007, Smith was found unresponsive in a room of the Seminole Hard Rock Hotel and Casino in Hollywood, Florida. She was rushed to hospital. A witness told local media that paramedics were pumping her chest when they took her out of the hotel. She's dead Anthony. Sorry buddy. [20]

Tacky, hysterical, or both?

Recipe for Success???

January 15, 2007 04:21 PM

Oh Sweet Jesus.  Nat Comisar, of all people, sent me spam promising me Maisonnette recipies in exchange for real estate listings.  He writes:

Recipe for Success can sell your home! Call or email me and I will show you how.

Now when you register for Recipe for Success you will receive Maisonette Chocolate Mousse! Well, you’ll get the recipe at least! I will send you my favorite recipes from Maisonette about once a month. If you are already a member don’t do a thing. Just let me know what‘s cooking!

Dinner’s over… dessert is finished… nothing left but coffee and the glow of a wonderful evening… then we brought you cookies…. These raspberry coconut bars were by far my favorite. I used to sneak into the dessert pantry and steal a few when I thought no one was looking.

He actually calls this marketing inititative "Recipe for Success."  Do I really have to point out that the person who ran The Maisonette out of business should not be calling his new marketing initiative "Recipe for Success"?  He took the longest running five star restaurant in North America and drove it into the ground.  People showed up for lunch one day and the doors were locked.  The contents of the restaurant were sold at auction.  I don't think I can benefit from his "recipes for success."

Could Paula Abdul possibly be more drunk? Here she is on a local news show this morning...

The Emporess Needs New Shoes

January 4, 2007 01:11 PM

Famous law blogging diva Ann Althouse has posted this picture of herself--as she is wont to do.

 Indie Coffee

What is she thinking?  She looks like a Willy Wonka Chocolate Factory escapee.

Is she destined to be single?

January 3, 2007 09:24 AM

Writing in the Washington Post, Richard Cohen wants to know if Monica Lewinsky will ever find a man:

But she is now a woman with a master's degree from a prestigious school and is going to be 34 come July. Her clock ticks, her life ebbs. Where is the man for her? Where is the guy brave enough, strong enough, admirable enough to take her as his wife, to suffer the slings and arrows of her outrageous fortune -- to say to the world (for it would be the entire world) that he loves this woman who will always be an asterisk in American history. I hope there is such a guy out there. It would be nice. It would be fair.

It would be too much baggage for any guy to take on.

Looking back on '06: Steve Irwin (RIP) and Ross the Intern

January 1, 2007 02:34 PM

Paris Hilton Hosts Baby Shower

August 10, 2006 05:59 PM

Okay, someone needs to give the girl that put this together a part on Saturday Night Live, because this is far more funny than anything they've done in the past 10 years.

And yes, we know it is, like, a week old and that is an internet eternity and everything.  It is still funny.

Nocturnal Creatures

July 18, 2006 04:50 PM

Things that hang out by the trash cans at night might carry diseases....

...that ferret should get itself tested.

Barbaro Takes Turn for the Worse

July 13, 2006 11:54 AM

Well, it looks like Mrs. NBS will not be going with us to Keeneland ever again.  She was furious about this situation before.  Wait until she hears this: A severe infection has set in Barbaro's right hind leg, and 80% of the hoof has been removed.


The prognosis is not good.  They are planning on keeping him alive for now, and putting him down if he is in pain.  Sad news.

UPDATE: Barbaro is reportedly doing better today.

Paris Hilton: Future Right Wing Heroine?

Well this is at the nexis of right wing conservative politics and pop culture... So it is right up our alley here at NBS.  Katherine Jean Lopez, writing in The Corner at National Review Online predicts:

I will continue to (yes, oddly) contend that one day Paris Hilton will prove to be a friend and ally to pro-abstinence, anti-abortion types. My basis for the assumption is currently a weak one, but time will tell.

WTF?  Do wha?  Yes, K-Lo, that IS an odd contention.  It is based on what, precisely?  I mean, don't get us wrong.  We love our conservative causes.  And we love Paris Hilton!  It's just we never really assumed we'd get to love 'em together. 

All of this pertains, of course, to Paris's recent announcement that she is going to give a shot at celibacy for the next year.  Thanks for sharing, Paris!  But K-Lo, it is not like this means a Heritage Foundation fellowship is the next step for Paris!  No.  We tend to agree more with A Socialites Life on this one:

Paris Hilton has recently decided to forego sex for one year, in order to "rediscover" herself.

That seems a bit extreme. How about just keeping pictures of your vagina out of the news for a year? That seems like a daunting enough task.

Indeed.  We need to start our little Paris out with baby steps, K-Lo.  Baby steps. 


"Son of a Terrorist Whore"

July 10, 2006 09:24 PM

Apparently that is what soccer (yes, we said soccer) superstar Zinédine Zidane was called prior to his now infamous decision to violently head-butt a member of the opposing team (at least according to a lip reader hired by the Times of London).

Exactly how is that more offensive than simply being called "French?" 

But seriously, we do think the Italian player was in the wrong.  The French are NOT terrorists.  They are terrorist appeasers.  There is a huge difference! 

If NBS had been on the opposing team, our taunt would have been much lengthier, and concluded with, "and we STILL remember how vous ne lettez pas nous utlisisons le French airspace to attackez Muamar Quadaffi!  Foo-twa!"