Culture Archives

The Blogging Blondes. Much to my complete surprise, I know them.

July 8, 2008 09:19 PM

Well, one of them anyway.

I got a text from a mutual friend yesterday, all "you have to turn on the homer right now!" So I did. Since it was the radio, it took me a minute to figure it out. Especially because the blogging blonde was not blonde the last time I saw her. She looked better brunette, but I have to say, the new color suits her personality better.

I think the most amusing thing is, they aren't even blogging.

Local WASP Curtis Sittenfeld to Publish "Thinly Veiled Novel" About Laura Bush

July 7, 2008 02:21 PM

How thinly veiled? This thinly veiled:

A kind, bookish only child born in the 1940s, Alice learned the virtues of politeness early on from her stolid parents and small Wisconsin hometown. But a tragic accident when she was seventeen shattered her identity and made her understand the fragility of life and the tenuousness of luck. So more than a decade later, when she met boisterous, charismatic Charlie Blackwell, she hardly gave him a second look: She was serious and thoughtful, and he would rather crack a joke than offer a real insight; he was the wealthy son of a bastion family of the Republican party, and she was a school librarian and registered Democrat. Comfortable in her quiet and unassuming life, she felt inured to his charms. And then, much to her surprise, Alice fell for Charlie.

Radar has more scoop, and it's even worse than you might expect:

On the heels of two best-selling books, (Prep, The Man of My Dreams), young, Iowa-trained [ed. Cincinnati-bred, her sister was in my class at Seven Hills, her dad Paul, is a principal at Baird] author Curtis Sittenfeld is about to release her most controversial book yet—a thinly veiled novel based on Laura Bush's life that is sure to send the White House into a fury.

According to Radar, the book describes "Alice's" trip to get an abortion administered by her grandmother's lesbian lover. Since it's a "novel," you see, it doesn't have to be true.

Here's another repulsive tidbit: It also describes "Alice" having sex with the brother of the boy she killed. Now Laura Bush was in a teenage car accident that took the life of a friend of hers. But of course, there's no evidence she had a relationship with the dead friend's brother, much less did this:

[H]e pushed me back against the mattress, straddled me, and leaned forward to roll his face between my breasts, pressing them against his cheeks and licking my nipples, his stubble rubbing not unpleasantly against my skin, and the more he grabbed and thrashed, the more the grabbing and thrashing seemed to stir rather than satisfy his desire. He pulled off my pants and underwear at the same time—I was wearing blue jeans, and he had to unbutton and unzip them first—and then I was naked except for my socks, which were white with lace trim. He tugged me upward and flipped me over, and when he said, 'No, you have to be on your knees,' it was the first time either of us had spoken in several minutes.

As far as thinly veiled novels go, I'd say this is clearly in the despicable camp. It least Kitty Kelly used real names when she was making shit up, Curtis.

I expect the Seven Hills alumni mag will produce a fawning review. I saw that because my expectations of my alma mater are so pathetically low. Perhaps the book will be too awful, even for their standards. But I doubt it.

UPDATE: Yes, I realize that for some inexplicable, blogospheric reason, you can't comment on this post. I don't know why. Sorry.

Scientists Peeved They Don't Have All the Answers

June 3, 2008 10:06 AM

From the NYT:

A decade ago, astronomers discovered that what is true for your car keys is not true for the galaxies. Having been impelled apart by the force of the Big Bang, the galaxies, in defiance of cosmic gravity, are picking up speed on a dash toward eternity. If they were keys, they would be shooting for the ceiling.
“That is how shocking this was,” Dr. Livio said.
It is still shocking. Although cosmologists have adopted a cute name, dark energy, for whatever is driving this apparently antigravitational behavior on the part of the universe, nobody claims to understand why it is happening, or its implications for the future of the universe and of the life within it, despite thousands of learned papers, scores of conferences and millions of dollars’ worth of telescope time. It has led some cosmologists to the verge of abandoning their fondest dream: a theory that can account for the universe and everything about it in a single breath.

What a bunch of idiots. Fools on fools' errands. And such arrogance! They want a theory that can account for no less than "the universe and everything about it." And they're looking in telescopes to try to find it.

Amusing though that they call this b.s. "dark energy." Wonder who had a hand in that?

Attorney General of Ohio one day, and the next...

May 16, 2008 12:34 PM

...it's helping the missuz slog crap on ebay (no really). From the Columbus Dispatch:

YOUNGSTOWN, Ohio (AP) — Former Ohio Attorney General Marc Dann spent his first day after resigning helping his wife with her business selling dishes online.
Dann's attorney Mike Harshman says Dann helped his wife, Alyssa Lenhoff Dann, with her side job selling Fiestaware on the Internet.
Dann walked two miles from his suburban Youngstown home Thursday to the office where he took orders and packed dishes.
Harshman says Dann is weighing career options that could include the law, teaching or another run for political office.
Dann resigned Wednesday after acknowledging an affair with a subordinate and ahead of a threat of impeachment.

So pathetic. If you did what he did would your wife let you pack her Fiestaware?

Dusty Rhodes to Single Moms: "And your little dog, too!!!"

May 6, 2008 12:22 PM

From today's Enquirer:

Kathleen Akin of Wyoming was featured in The Enquirer April 24 for her decision to be a single mother. But it was her dog that got the attention of the Hamilton County Auditor's Office.
After a photo showed Akin, 45, and her children walking with Sophie, the family's King Charles spaniel, Akin got a letter from the Auditor's Office.
"We saw a picture from Thursday's Cincinnati Enquirer of you in the 'Single Women Who Choose Motherhood" article,'" stated the letter. "When we checked our dog registration database, we didn't find any references you had licensed your dog Sophie."

Obviously, something had to be done about these law breakers:

Can you f***ing believe? The Auditor justifies it thusly:

"We've done it six times so far," said Auditor, DEMOCRAT [ed.] Dusty Rhodes. "We've got a pretty hip staff and people are reading things."
His advice: "Keep your dog out of the picture if it's not licensed."

Since when is being an ass "pretty hip"?

Breaking economic news from the New York Times: People are being forced to live within their incomes!

May 1, 2008 07:10 AM

My times are bad, aren't they? Per the NYT:

As real estate prices plunge, so does the ability of homeowners to borrow against the value of their homes, crimping a major artery of spending. As banks grow tighter with their dollars in a period of uncertainty, families are running up against credit limits, forcing many to live within their incomes.

First, what's so bad about people living within their incomes? And second, if these people are up against their credit limits, THEY STOPPING LIVING WITHIN THEIR INCOME A LONG TIME AGO.

Maybe these people aren't the victims? Maybe they're actually the ones who deserve the blame for the bad economy?

Last night's Reds game, Jesse Jackson and two guys in gorilla suits

April 10, 2008 09:00 AM

Was anyone else watching last night's game on FSN Ohio? Mrs. NBS and I had it on in the background, and we both glanced up when announcer Jeff Brantley started talking about how Jesse Jackson was in attendance at the game. And then our mouths fell open when the camera focused in on two guys in the stands--wearing gorilla suits.

We could not believe it.

I'm not one to see racism where it doesn't exist, but MY GOD they really did cross the line putting that audio with that video. I'm wondering if the camera guy thought it was a funny joke, and Jeff Brantley didn't know what was on the screen as he was talking about Jesse Jackson? Brantley didn't sound like he was saying anything deliberate.

But still--someone needs to look into it. Surely someone else noticed it besides just us?

A few minutes later Jeff Brantley was talking about some player who got hit in the groin with a baseball--and talking about it in great detail. Weird, weird, weird. Mrs. NBS said "Is he drunk?" It sure seemed like it. But he kind of always sounds that way.

"Expelled"--The Art House Film no Art House is Going to Show

April 2, 2008 10:30 PM

But it sure sounds interesting.

In fact, I wonder who, if anyone, is going to show this film. It obviously isn't typical indie film fare. And those who like indie films aren't open-minded enough to see it. We shall see if the independent film theaters in town--the Esquire in Clifton and the Mariemont--are actually brave enough to show it. My guess is no.

For one intellect's thoughts on the film, check out this learned prof:

He seems smart.

Big lib implicated in prostitution sting...

Stabenow's husband caught in Troy prostitution sting, police report says
Jennifer Chambers / The Detroit News
TROY -- The co-founder and former CEO of the liberal-progressive Democracy Radio and husband of U.S. Senator Debbie Stabenow was caught in February by a Troy police sting aimed at catching prostitutes, according to a police report.
Thomas L. Athans was stopped Feb. 26 by undercover officers investigating a possible prostitution ring in a room at the Residence Inn near Big Beaver and Interstate 75. Athans paid a 20-year-old prostitute $150 for sex in a Troy hotel but was not arrested, according to police reports obtained through a Freedom of Information Act request by The Detroit News. The police report said officers observed Athans enter a room under surveillance and leave 15 minutes later. Detectives followed and stopped Athans' silver 2002 Cadillac DeVille on Interstate 75 near Square Lake Road.

I do so love that he was arrested in a town called Big Beaver. That's almost as embarrassing as the report that he left "15 minutes later." You know they put that part in on purpose.

And he drives a 2002 Cadillac DeVille. How typical. Wonder what he looks like?

Yep, he's pretty much as you would have guessed.

John McCain's New Ad...

March 7, 2008 03:58 PM

...is excellent.

Of course, I would never vote for someone because of a campaign ad. But that's just me, and a lot of people don't think that way.

How funny is it that the Democrats are calling each other names, and the McCain campaign is producing video like this?

Ann Althouse has excellent commentary up on the visuals, from the subtle references to "The Color Purple" to the LBJ daisy ad. I suspect there's more there, if you look. This was very, very well thought out.

For the first time, I walked in to the polls not knowing who I was going to vote for.

March 4, 2008 09:07 AM

The temptation to cross party lines and vote for Hillary was very, very strong. Having her continue to battle it out with Obama is very good for the cause. But in the end, I couldn't do it. The woman in front of me did, though. And I know a lot of people who were considering it. When you switch parties, you have to complete a form that says you swear "to uphold the principles of the Democratic party." Well that wouldn't be too hard--since they have no principles.

How's that for an obvious joke?

Anyway... I placed my protest vote for Mitt Romney. Not that it will matter in the end. My protest vote in the 2000 primary didn't matter either.

I did get to vote in all the down ticket Republican races. For Congress, I voted for Jean Schmidt. Over at WMD, they've pretty much summarized my thoughts on that race, so I won't repeat it all here. The only other contested race was Pat DeWine v. Kathy King for Judge. I voted for Pat, since he's pro-life, and Kathy is not. For most of the other judicial races, I refrained from voting for the party's endorsed candidates. Most of the people they put up are total chuckleheads--though it was a nice reminder of how glad I am that I litigate almost entirely in federal courts these days.

And of course, I voted against the Cincinnati public school levy and the zoo levy. The only way I'd get behind either of those two organizations would be if they switched missions. Let the zoo put the CPS students behind bars, and let the schools educate the animals. We'd end up with a safer community and a more intelligent workforce.

I'm kidding of course. Well, slightly kidding.

McCain Local Radiogate '08

February 27, 2008 03:55 PM

Just how many people did the McCain campaign manage to offend when they were in town? Here we have the producer of 55KRC's morning radio show, chiming in about the treatment he received from the McCain camp. Take it away, Joe Strecker:

As you know, it's Ohio's turn to be in the spotlight, for the last 2 weeks, I have been pitched and pitched AND PITCHED every person under the sun to stump for Sen. McCain. As agreed to by his PR, if I put guests on to stump for Sen. McCain, he would be made available to 55KRC when he came to town (2/26)...
Well here is the email reply I received from the McCain camp

"I don't think for tomorrow, things are pretty set by now. " Rebecca - McCain 2008

As you can tell by my response, I was a little upset.

"I am getting a little frustrated. 55KRC is / has a very Conservative base...Much more than a lot of people think. These are the voters Sen. McCain needs to win over. Since the election started, most of our callers initially were Thompson fans, then when he dropped out, Paul and Romney fans. If there are any listeners/voters to win over, it would be 55KRC's. I hope you reconsider. We could do just 5 minutes on his drive up from downtown to West Chester?"

Here was my reply.

"I'm sorry but the decision is not mine. I recomended you to the higher ups for the exact reason you mentioned. I will try to ask again when I can but right now I am stuck." - Rebecca McCain 2008

I find out at 10:30 yesterday that McCain was on with Mike McConnell, who McCain called "Bob". I called Rebecca, and when she said on the phone he wasn't available, I told her he is on right now with WLW. >>>Silence<<< then she told me "Can't you just use their audio??" You have to be kidding me..I let her know that we will let our listener's know what happened.

Now, I do understand this is a business and we constantly try to scoop the other guys, but for McCain's people to actually go back on their promise and to act the way they acted and treated the station with the listener's he needs to convince, is just reprehensible. This proves to me what kind of person he is. Why? You surround yourself with like minded people. If his 'people' don't care about you '55KRC listener' vicariously he doesn't care about you '55KRC' listener....

What's even funnier is that last night at 9PM, I received a pitch for another guest to stump for McCain. I don't think I'm going to book them..

I honestly don't know why he'd even consider it. And it's more than a little concerning that they're willling to put a candidate's supporters on the radio in exchange for the big "get"--i.e. an interview with the candidate himself. I suppose that's the way the media game is played, but it doesn't speak well of its participants. When you whore yourself out, Joe, don't be surpised when you get stabbed by jack the ripper.

And again, how stupid is the McCain camp for missing the interview? Joe is totally right that the Morning Show's audience is exactly the people McCain needs to be reaching out to. But there's just little or no effort.

It's almost a parody of a well-run campaign. "Can't you just use their audio?" Um no. Have they ever worked with the news media before?

William F. Buckley, Jr., 1925-2008

From The New York Times (!):

Mr. Buckley’s greatest achievement was making conservatism — not just electoral Republicanism, but conservatism as a system of ideas — respectable in liberal post-World War II America.

And it is so obvious these day, isn't it? There is a big distinction between electoral Republicanism and conservatism as a system of ideas. Sign me up with the later.

Also timely? The NYT's amusing reminder of National Review's lukewarm endorsement of Eisenhower in the 1956 presidential election:

"We prefer Ike."

It seems we are still fighting the same battles. But we would have already lost the war if it weren't for WFB.

A reader contributes: Politically Incorrect Ads of Yesteryear

February 22, 2008 09:25 AM

Lose Weight, with Worms

I can envision my ancestors eating sanitized tapeworms to help shed some pounds. That's just the kind of people we are. Practical.

Lots of cigarette ads in the bunch:

The Cigarette Even a Doctor Could Love

I like how the Doctor invites you to test Camels in your "T-zone" for thirty days. T for Throat, T for taste.

And this one? Well, it reminds me of John McCain:

A Pill for Your Pop

Yes, Thorazine "can control the agitated, beligerent senile and help the patient to live a composed and useful life."

More Politically Incorrect Ads of Yesteryear are available here. Thanks to the reader for sending them in.

Something I had not quite expected someone would ask me today: "Are you here for the Barack Obama meeting?"

February 18, 2008 11:05 PM

So I was at Molly Malone's for a meeting with some fellow Republicans--prominent, you'd-recognize-their-names-as-major-local-right-wingers types of people--and up comes this breathless young man. He asks: "Are you here for the Barack Obama meeting?" I looked around for the camera, thinking "Am I on Punk'd?"

But no, this guy was serious. Because a few minutes later, they started arriving. So we ordered another round, thinking we'd hear some good stuff. I know that I, personally, wanted to hear about Change and The Future, and also thought it would be fun to see some people overcome by emotion, and passing out--as was widely reported today, people are wont to do at Obama rallies. He's a regular political Benny Hinn, from what I hear. A modern-day faith healer. You'll recall that the faith healers of old usually ended up leaving town with their tent and your money. I just throw that out there as an aside. Not sure exactly why.

Anyway. I was so disappointed with the Obama crowd. All they did was sit around looking pissed off and disaffected. We waited and waited for the meeting to start, but nothing ever happened, and then people started leaving. There was one guy with a laptop who appeared to be in charge. I say that because, well, he had a laptop. It had Obama stickers all over it, and the blue glow from the screen really lit up his white liberal pallor. And he had one of those kinky haired beards that looks, well, pubic. You know. You've seen these people. I know it's rude to point this out, and talk about the physical attributes of the political opposition. But when nothing substantive is said, what else is there to criticize? I was waiting for the policy conversation, I'd happily criticize that. That was why I stayed. But no. Nothing.

So.... I guess it was like a real Obama Rally. Nothing substantive. All build up, and no.... POP.

I'll probably be the first person to quote Gertrude Stein while criticizing Barack Obama. But seriously. "There was no there there." Literally, there was NONE. And unfortunately, I was expecting something like this:

And that just goes to illustrate something that I expect will soon be a problem for Barack Obama. He's over-promised. Expectations are too high. In trial practice class in law school, there's one big thing they teach you about opening statements. Don't overstate your case. Don't promise too much. Don't tell the jury you can deliver something that you can't. Because at the end of the trial, they're going to go into the jury room, alone, and ask each other, "Did he give us, what he said he was going to give us?" The answer to that needs to be "Yes!"

In Barack's case, he's told us he's going to give us Change. Not just minor change. But a major reworking of American political life and American culture. When people go into the voting both, alone, are they honestly going to believe he will give them what he's promised?

The Village of Indian Hill: "We don't care if poor peoples' babies go flying through windshields."

Okay, so Mrs. NBS and I spent Saturday at Childbirth Class (more on that later) and I wanted to make sure I blogged about one of the leaflets we were given, because it was so obnoxious. And that leaflet was the list of all the fire departments in the Greater Cincinnati area where they'll put your car seat in properly for you. You know, because car seats are so complicated that people can't figure them out, and then they get in an accident and the next thing you know, there's a dead baby.

So it's basically a service that's a good thing, something that firemen can do while they're waiting around for a fire that needs to be put out. Because I'm sure nobody's going to show up and be like "Wait! Don't leave! You can't go to that fire, I need you to put my car seat in."

Except that must be what the Indian Hill-Madeira Fire Department is afraid of. Either that, or hordes of people from Madisonville demanding immediate car seat attention. I don't know what. Because yes, you guessed it. On the lengthy list of fire departments in the Tri-State that you can go to to get your car seat put in, Indian Hill is the only one that specifies: "RESIDENTS' ONLY." It is the only one, out of dozens and dozens of municipalities, that puts ANY restrictions on its car seat installation policy. And this is on a list that goes to practically every expectant couple in the Tri-State, nearly all of whom don't live in Indian Hill and would never dream of going to the Indian Hill Fire Department and demanding car seat attention. Bad PR, Indian Hill. Bad, bad PR.

When we were looking over these materials on Saturday, I saw the woman in front of me pointing to Indian Hill and saying to her husband "Look, they say 'RESIDENTS' ONLY.'" This was a couple that was probably going to have difficulty even affording to buy a car seat. Much less a house in Indian Hill, which is apparently what they need if they happen to stop by the I-H Fire Department because they can't figure out how to put the damn thing in.

I would think the hassle of putting in maybe five or six extra car seats per year for non-Indian Hill residents would be more than outweighed by the benefits of not singling your municipality out as being horrifically snobby. What the hell is this, India during the reign of Queen Victoria?

And today's total lack of class outrage from the Enquirer is...

February 15, 2008 09:43 AM

Crotch shots of teenage boys, now up on the Enquirer's main page:

I honestly don't see how that's not intentional.

UPDATE: This story has been rolled to the sports section, and the photo placed in the "photo gallery." The "Triplets' Mom" has been found not guilty, so that's now on the main page.

UPDATE NO. 2: A reader, quite rightfully, pointed out to me tonight that part of the problem is people don't know how to sit properly. The kid in this photo is old enough to know better. And should certainly have been warned about creepy "photographers."

From the "I wish I wrote it department..."

February 14, 2008 09:33 AM

...Iowahawk chimes in with:

Heere Bigynneth the Tale of the Asse-Hatte.
An Archbishop of Canterbury Tale

1 Whan in Februar, withe hise global warmynge
2 Midst unseasonabyl rain and stormynge
3 Gaia in hyr heat encourages
4 Englande folke to goon pilgrimages.
5 Frome everiches farme and shire
6 Frome London Towne and Lancanshire
7 The pilgryms toward Canterbury wended
8 Wyth fyve weke holiday leave extended
9 In hybryd Prius and Subaru
10 Off the Boughton Bypasse, east on M2.
11 Fouer and Twyntie theye came to seke
12 The Arche-Bishop, wyse and meke
13 Labouryte and hippye, Gaye and Greene
14 Anti-warre and libertyne
15 All sondry folke urbayne and progressyve
16 Vexed by Musselmans aggressyve.
17 Hie and thither to the Arche-Bishop's manse
18 The pilgryms ryde and fynde perchance
19 The hooly Bishop takynge tea
20 Whilste watching himselfe on BBC.

Read the whole thing.

It's shaping up to be a depressing Super Tuesday.

February 5, 2008 04:17 PM

But this thing makes me happy.

"If you can sit, you can get fit. Hu-wah-ee Chair." I love that.

Well, they killed Louise, our escaped cow

January 30, 2008 09:17 AM

WHY WHY WHY DID LOUISE HAVE TO DIE?

Oh, because she weighed 1,150 pounds, and was headed for I-275. I'm waiting for the uproar. Why didn't they taze her? Someone always asks that question.

Evidently, they did try a tranquilizer dart, but it didn't work.

And apparently, she was a he. Which I find amusing because the News 5 reporter who was covering this on Monday night was dressed entirely in bright red. Someone in wardrobe at News 5 must have had it in for her.

Some people also did not know that one of our commenters named ~~her~~ him Louise. Here's the owner of Stehlin's Meats:

"We didn't give this steer a nickname," Stehlin said. "My grandfather always told us never to name the cattle. They're animals, not pets."

You know some people read that and were shocked to hear that food comes from animals, not grocery stores. You know they were.

Anyway, Louise, may you rest in peace. Your candle burned out long before your legend ever did.

Louise

_____-2008

“The road to the White House goes through Florida, and the road to Florida goes through The Villages."

January 29, 2008 12:53 PM

So says an old fart quoted in this article, anyway. Mrs. NBS and I always laugh at the commercials for The Villages. It makes Florida--God's waiting room--look like a hellhole.

Sorry I can't find the commercial where they're all tap dancing. That one's a classic.

Here we go again. Cincinnati has another escaped cow.

January 28, 2008 10:20 AM

Isn't this the third time this has happened in the past few years?

COLERAIN TWP. -- Police are searching for a 1000-pound black Angus cow that escaped this morning about 8:15 from a holding pen at Stehlin's Meat Packing Co. in Colerain Township.
It appears that a holding pen gate was inadvertently left open, according to the Hamilton County sheriff's office and Colerain Township police.
The cow is owned by the meat packing company. The cow was last seen near the intersection of Colerain Avenue and Dry Ridge Road.
Report any sightings of the cow to the Hamilton County Sheriff’s Office, 513-825-1500.

Run, Elsie, run! Nothing brings Cincinnatians together like an escaped cow.

Yale Med Students Celebrate 35 Years of Roe v. Wade

January 23, 2008 09:22 AM

Thusly:

Evans and Rasha Khoury MED ’08, another member of Medical Students for Choice, who said she plans to become a gynecologist and expects to perform abortions, went on to describe one of the most common abortion procedures, manual vacuum aspiration, which “creates suction to evacuate pregnancy,” Evans said. The technique is a good option because the device involved is reusable and relatively cheap, she said.
“It’s not as scary as it seems. It’s just blood and mucus,” Khoury said, referring to the fetus remains in the device. She added, “You’ll be able to see arms and stuff, but still just miniscule.”
Evans and Khoury also explained the finer points of abortion-clinic etiquette, including some potentially sensitive terminology. Khoury said physicians performing abortions generally refer to the aborted fetus remains as “POC,” an acronym for “product of conception,” and refer to fetus’ hearts as “FH.”
The most complicated part of the procedure can be the emotional fallout some patients experience, she said.
“Often times, women are crying and cursing and saying they’re going to hell,” Khoury said. “It may be a quick and easy medical procedure, but it definitely is a very involved social-medical procedure.”
The presenters also urged the crowd to become involved in the abortion-rights movement by joining Reproductive Health Externships, a campaign in which volunteers are taught how to conduct abortions.
“It’s fun because you meet people from all over the country who do them,” Khoury said. “It’s pretty inspiring.”

So which is more disturbing, the quote about how you can see "arms and legs and stuff," or the guy who says "It's fun because you meet people from all over the country who do them. It's pretty inspiring"?

UPDATE: Hmmm. The article has been pulled from the website of the Yale Daily News. I can't imagine why.

"The Groesbecks were another comely race."

January 22, 2008 10:05 PM

In the comments, Polite, Refined and Tall suggests that the video "Price Hill Girls" should be reason enough for me to visit the West Side. And here's what that comment reminds me of, and that's this passage from The Serene Cincinnatians, which was published in 1950 as part of the "Society in America" series (if you haven't already, do check out The Spectacular San Franciscans, the authors of which must have had no idea of what was yet to come):

The Groesbecks were another comely race. In mid-nineteenth century, the Misses Olivia Groesbeck and Sally Carneal were spoken of as the two most beautiful girls in Cincinnati. A portrait of Olivia by Thomas Buchanan Read, in the home of a kinswoman in New York, confirms not only the fact of her beauty but of Read's fine ability as a painter. She visited England once, and met the Duke of Wellington, evidently making a distinct impression upon that old connoisseur; for there is a legend that when, long afterward, he tasted some of Nicholas Longworth's wine, and praising it, asked where it came from, "Cincinnati!" he repeated. "Ah, that is where Miss Groesbeck lives."

Back in my Bachelor days, I used to think this anecdote would make a great toast. I would re-tell it, and then raise my glass to the beautiful young lady, and salute both her, and our fair city, saying, "To Cincinnati. Where Miss Groesbeck lives."

But you know what? We never had any Groesbecks as débutantes. Much less any from there.

I like them Price Hill Girls

HT: Nixguy

When I said I feared the NBS baby would be a Democrat, perhaps I misspoke.

January 18, 2008 11:35 PM

Though it is a pity Democrats would say it's child abuse to kick his ass.

Pop quiz. Sharon Stone's catsuit is __________.

Just right...

Too tight?

The Candidates' Homes, an NBS Tour

January 17, 2008 02:59 PM

Of course, Mother Jones put these photos up because they want you to think we're ruled by monied, hypocritical, gas guzzling aristocrats, no matter which party wins. I'm putting them up because real estate is porn for married people. So let's begin!

Here's Huckabee's house. Not surprisingly, the candidate that I like the least has the house I like the least. It's weighs in at 5,124 square feet, with a deck and a swimming pool. It's also boring, and has atrocious landscaping:

Here's Rudy's pad in New York. I really can't relate to it, but it's got a Walnut-paneled dining room and a cigar room. I don't smoke, but I like the sound of that. There's no rule that says you can't use your cigar room as a drinking room.

The McCains do the tall building thing too, but theirs is a $4.7 mill condo in Phoenix. They also have a ranch in Sedona, which was profiled in Home & Garden. I think I also saw it in Architectural Digest a few years ago. It was nice. Better than their condo, anyway:

Turning for a minute to the other side of the aisle, here's Hill and Bill's place in Westchester County. I have no problems with it, and it certainly comports with whatever their pollster told them to buy. I just wonder if they've ever seen it themselves?

Can't you just feel the love radiating off of the Clinton's house? You know it's just a place of intimate diners for two, and passionate, romantic interludes. When Hillary's in D.C.

The Obamas' place in Chicago is also nice. And, it has a 1,000 bottle wine cellar. Me like the sound of that! Party at the Obamas! They need to learn to bring the trash cans back up promptly though. How rude.

You've already heard me opine in the hideousness of the Edwards home in North Carolina. It is too big (21,000 square feet). And it has an indoor basketball court. They also have a beach house in North Carolina. Presumably it's more suitable to his "Two Americas" crap than this is:

Here's one that's big and tasteful. It's the Romney's ski retreat in Park City, Utah. Looks like a house the Bushes would own. Mitt has residences in several states, I believe. Mrs. Romney must do a lot of dusting. Of course, when you don't smoke or drink, what else is there to do?

NBS is ready to call the winner in the taste department, though. This is the Thompsons' house in McLean, Virginia. A seven bedroom, five bath stunner with a real Presidential air.

Gorgeous.

Does anyone actually believe Hillary Clinton's favorite tv shows are Grey's Anatomy, Antiques Roadshow, American Idol and Dancing with the Stars?

January 16, 2008 03:34 PM

I mean seriously. What campaign aide made this shit up? Dancing with the Stars? You know she spends her nights throwing popcorn at Chris Matthews. I mean come on. You know she does.

I do see her watching Grey's Anatomy and Idol, though. They're probably the training videos she uses to teach herself to cry on command. And Antiques Roadshow? Probably reminds her of the White House furniture she and Bill stole when they were on their way out the door in January, 2000.

No way she watches these shows to be entertained by them. No way.

And on the Republican side... John McCain. Prison Break? Are you kidding me? The reason he gives:

"...because as a fellow prisoner, I always dreamed and plotted how I would break out of the Hanoi Hilton."

Ridiculous. Surely, he must think we're idiots.

Elevator Etiquette

January 11, 2008 08:45 AM

The Rule: You let ladies go first when getting on an empty elevator. But when you're getting off a crowded elevator, the person who gets off first is the one closest to the door.

You do not slam yourself up against the wall so the ladies can try to stumble past you.

You do not snicker when the other man who's standing closest to the door knows the rules, and try to make him look like he's not being considerate of the ladies. He's being considerate by not blocking them in. He's also being considerate by wearing an undershirt to work, so while we're talking etiquette, you need to be wearing one. Chest hair is not allowed at the office.

"We are facing an epidemic of cocktails served in inappropriately large glasses."

January 10, 2008 09:54 AM

Well at least it's not bird flu. A oversized cocktail epidemic? Is this really a concern? Apparently so:

"A too-large glass gives the drink more time to lose its chill and initial zest, and a half-filled glass looks unexciting, so an average-size cocktail glass of 4 1/2 ounces is the most satisfactory," wrote Collette Richardson in the 1973 edition of "House & Garden's Drink Guide."
Thirty-five years later, just try finding a 4.5-ounce cocktail glass. In fact, most glassware called for in cocktail books has become exceedingly difficult to find. Retailers also are stocked with ridiculously huge double old-fashioned glasses, clocking in at 10 to 15 ounces. Finding the normal six- to eight-ounce old-fashioned glass that most drink recipes call for is difficult but not impossible....

The same is true with wine glasses these days. The sizing has gotten ridiculous. Now you don't buy a glass, you buy a "pour." And that's usually a third of a bottle. And apparently, it's not a good thing. The Washington Post tells us:

"Cocktail geeks have always known that small martini glasses are better."

I'm a cocktail geek and I didn't know that. I like the oversized glasses because they look less... dainty. But apparently the theory is that if the drink is too big, you won't finish it while it is still ice, ice cold. Makes sense to me. Have two small ones instead of one big one. Or, four small ones instead of two big ones. Or, six small ones instead of three big ones. You get the idea.

So the Bucks may have lost last night, but we'll always have Michigan to make fun of.

January 8, 2008 10:01 AM

And they are such easy targets, aren't they? From the University of Michigan's course catalog:

Section 002 — How to be Gay: Male Homosexuality and Initiation.

Credits: (3; 2 in the half-term).

Instructor(s): David M Halperin (halperin@umich.edu)

Course Description:

Just because you happen to be a gay man doesn't mean that you don't have to learn how to become one. Gay men do some of that learning on their own, but often we learn how to be gay from others, either because we look to them for instruction or because they simply tell us what they think we need to know, whether we ask for their advice or not.

This course will examine the general topic of the role that initiation plays in the formation of gay male identity. We will approach it from three angles: (1) as a sub-cultural practice — subtle, complex, and difficult to theorize — which a small but significant body of work in queer studies has begun to explore; (2) as a theme in gay male writing; and (3) as a class project, since the course itself will constitute an experiment in the very process of initiation that it hopes to understand.

In particular, we will examine a number of cultural artifacts and activities that seem to play a prominent role in learning how to be gay: Hollywood movies, grand opera, Broadway musicals, and other works of classical and popular music, as well as camp, diva-worship, drag, muscle culture, taste, style, and political activism. Are there a number of classically 'gay' works such that, despite changing tastes and generations, all gay men, of whatever class, race, or ethnicity, need to know them, in order to be gay? What is there about gay identity that explains the gay appropriation of these works? What do we learn about gay male identity by asking not who gay men are but what it is that gay men do or like? One aim of exploring these questions is to approach gay identity from the perspective of social practices and cultural identifications rather than from the perspective of gay sexuality itself. What can such an approach tell us about the sentimental, affective, or subjective dimensions of gay identity, including gay sexuality, that an exclusive focus on gay sexuality cannot?

At the core of gay experience there is not only identification but disidentification. Almost as soon as I learn how to be gay, or perhaps even before, I also learn how not to be gay. I say to myself, 'Well, I may be gay, but at least I'm not like that!' Rather than attempting to promote one version of gay identity at the expense of others, this course will investigate the stakes in gay identifications and disidentifications, seeking ultimately to create the basis for a wider acceptance of the plurality of ways in which people determine how to be gay.

Additional note. This course is not a basic introduction to gay male culture, but an exploration of certain issues arising from it. It assumes some background knowledge. Students wishing to inform themselves about gay men and gay culture in a preliminary way should enroll in an introductory course in lesbian/gay studies.

HT: Stand Firm.

UPDATE: Comments are not working again. No idea why. It's probably for the best.

Pet Detectives are real...

January 7, 2008 09:14 AM

...I had no idea. This family searched for six days, and the pet detective (and his bluetick) found their dog in six minutes.

They took Samantha to the place where Rudy was last seen - a broken backyard fence - and gave her a whiff of one of Rudy's toys. Samantha followed the scent of the little black dog to a neighbor's yard where the family had looked several times before. But this time, as they called Rudy's name, his little head popped up from a ditch and he barked.
He was pinned between a log and a fence in a neighbor's yard. He couldn't move his legs, but he was alive.
"I've never been so happy in my entire life!" said Ellis of the moment she saw her dog. "I was screaming 'That's my dog! That's my dog!"

Wouldn't that be a rewarding side job? And he charges $350 a pop. Not bad for a side gig doing what you enjoy.

This is creepy though: Rudy's owner had already hired a pet psychic, who told the dog was "near the house and couldn't move," but couldn't pin down the exact spot.

Turned out to be true!

Commenting problem. Solved?

January 5, 2008 11:03 PM

Well they appear to be working again, for no reason other than I've been on an anti-spam commenting crusade. I think cleaning them out was like a blogospheric angioplasty or something. Now every thing is flowing much more properly.

If you've ever scrolled through the archives, you've probably noticed a lot of spam in the comments. I've gotten lazy about deleting these, because I know most people only read the main page. Apparently, I've gotten too lazy. And I think I figured out the source of the problem. It was this post, which was about a minor kerfuffle I had with the Cincinnati Beacon in August. They had taken me to task for (supposedly) not knowing the difference between cuckolding and swinging. In my post, I apologized for my gross ignorance (well, kind of apologized. As much as I would ever apologize anyway), and clarified that I do, in fact, know what a "hot wife" is.

Well, you can imagine the kind of comment spam this post attracted. Apparently there are a lot of people trying to peddle their spam wares, and those wares have much to do with cuckolding, swinging, and hot wives. In fact, since that post went up in August, it has attracted 13,670 comments, from people attempting to sell loyal NBSers all sorts of services, products, website entertainments, etc. None of which were endorsed by me. Nor did I get a cut of any proceeds from those of you who got pervy entertainment via links from my comments.

I discovered this by simply going through old posts, and turning off the comments on old posts that seemed to attract a lot of spam. Most of them would maybe have 30-100 spam comments, and I'd wipe those out, thinking that all of them, collectively, must have been slowing the system. And then I got to the post with the 13,670 comments. The system crashed twice, just while I was deleting them. And it took forever to get rid of them all. My commenting problems must have been caused by this minor Cincinnati Beacon kerfuffle. Who would of thought? A kerfuffle with Beacon... hardly something worthy of my time.

And as for the spamers, I'm pretty ignorant of how they target what they do. I assume they have programs that pick out posts that suit whatever they've been hired to peddle, and then they target those posts with lots of spam comments (all of which contain hyperlinks to their products).

But what I don't understand is, why they think someone is going to be reading NBS and getting some anti-Hillary Clinton diatribe and then suddenly decide to link on some pervy hyperlink in the comments. I get the point of the spam comments, but why the hell leave them here? Are you all a bunch of pervs? Is Senator Larry Craig an NBSer? Are you all secretly interested in cuckolding, swinging and hot wives? What is with you freaks?

FYI: Comments on this post will be turned of in three days. If you have anything to say, say it now.

At long last, the details on the Kucinich UFO sighting

January 2, 2008 02:22 PM

I've been interested in this ever since Shirley MacLaine chimed in last fall, and said that Dennis Kucinich had seen a UFO in the backyard of her house. He's refused to give us the details, but now we've got 'em, thanks to the intrepid reporters at The Wall Street Journal. They spoke to the others who were there, Paul Costanzo, "a Juilliard-trained trumpet player and jujitsu black belt, who worked as Ms. MacLaine's assistant, personal trainer and bodyguard," and Mr. Costanzo's then-girfriend.

Ms. MacLaine was up performing her one woman show in Canada at the time, and wasn't home. Dennis was living at her house, though, writing his memoirs after Clevelanders voted him out of office after one term as Mayor. So it was just the three of them. You know, hanging out at Shirley's place.

Anyway, back to the story:

The day was strange from the start. For hours, Mr. Kucinich, Mr. Costanzo and his companion noticed a high-pitched sound. "There was a sense that something extraordinary was happening all day," says the girlfriend. She and Mr. Costanzo say that none of the three consumed alcohol or took drugs.
As they sat down to a dinner, Mr. Kucinich spotted a light in the distance, to the left of Mount Rainier. Mr. Costanzo thought it was a helicopter.
But Mr. Kucinich walked outside to the deck to look through the telescope that he had bought Ms. MacLaine as a house gift. After a few minutes, Mr. Kucinich summoned the other two: "Guys, come on out here and look at this."
Mr. Costanzo and his girlfriend joined Mr. Kucinich, where they took turns peering through the telescope. What they saw in the far distance, according to both witnesses, was a hovering light, which soon divided into two, and then three.
After a few minutes, the lights moved closer and it became apparent that they were actually three charcoal-gray, triangular craft, flying in a tight wedge. The girlfriend remembers each triangle having red and green lights running down the edges, with a laser-like red light at the tail. Mr. Costanzo recalls white lights, but no tail.
Mr. Costanzo says each triangle was roughly the size of a large van, while his former girlfriend compares it to a "larger Cessna, smaller than a jet certainly." Neither recalls seeing any markings, landing gear, engines, windows or cockpits.
The craft approached to within 200 yards, suspended over the field just beyond the swimming pool. Both witnesses say it emitted a quiet, throbbing sound -- nothing like an airplane engine.
"There was a feeling of wanting to communicate something, but I didn't know what," says Mr. Costanzo.
The craft held steady in midair, for perhaps a minute, then sped away, Mr. Costanzo says. "Nothing had landed," he says. "No strange beings had disembarked. No obvious messages were beamed down. When they were completely out of sight, we all looked at each other disbelieving what we had seen."
At Mr. Kucinich's suggestion, they jotted down their impressions and drew pictures to memorialize the event. Mr. Kucinich kept the notes, according to Ms. MacLaine, who said he promised her recently that he would try to find them.
"It was proof to me that we're obviously not alone," says the girlfriend.
The next day, the group spotted what they thought to be military helicopters buzzing around the valley where they had made the sighting. And the high-pitched sound remained.
Mr. Kucinich called Ms. MacLaine in Canada to tell her what had happened. "He said it was beautiful, serene, and it moved him," says Ms. MacLaine, who is supporting Mr. Kucinich's candidacy. "He was not afraid of it, let's put it that way. Seeing something that close and sophisticated and gentle."
Ms. MacLaine says she has seen UFOs from a distance in New Mexico and Peru, but never up close. She was envious. "I'm the one who reports them, but they never make close visitation. What am I doing wrong?"

What is she doing wrong, indeed?

Also, where are those notes? Dennis promised Shirley recently that he would try to find them. Why doesn't he get on that?

And what about this:

Ms. MacLaine says she called Mr. Kucinich before she included his UFO sighting in her book, "Sage-ing while Age-ing," a recounting of her spiritual and professional journeys. "I can handle it," she says he told her.

Talk about things you can say when you know your Presidential campaign is going nowhere. Here's how I imagine that conversation going down:

Drrrrrring. Drrrrrrrrring. [phone ringing].
Dennis: "Howdy ho!"
Shirley: "Hey Denny it's Shirls."
Dennis: "Haaaaay Shirls!!!!"
Shirley: "Your voice. Dennis. God, I miss you. When you need me in New Hampshire, I'm there for you."
Dennis: "I need to check with Elizabeth."
Shirley: "LOVE that girl. You know Den, I was thinking..."
Dennis: "Talk to me Shirls! Talk to me!"
Shirley: "...remember when you were staying with me twenty five years ago..."
Dennis: "OH YEAH. KEEP TALKING. OH YEAH!"
Shirley: "Well I was just down in Peru looking at cave art drawn here five million years by Our Friends and was thinking about that time you were at my house with Pauly and his girl, and you all had that special experience."
Dennis: "OH YEAH. KEEP TALKING. OH YEAH!"
Shirley: "Dennis! (giggles) I'm talking about the time you saw The Ship! I was wondering if I could put that in my new book, Sage-ing While Age-ing."
Dennis: "Oh what the hell. Why not."
Shirley: "Wonders, Den. Wonders. You're the best! Hugs and kisses to Elizabeth!"
Dennis: "OH YEAH. KEEP TALKING. OH YEAH!"

An "I Only Date Democrats" Girl

January 1, 2008 11:41 AM

[Phote pulled due to guilt trip by Jackie Danicki. Jackie, at the very least, your friend has bitchface.]

A severe, manly jaw. Stringy hair. No make-up. Pale skin. Eyebrows tweezed into mean little lines. No sense of pride in her appearance. And just this aura of anger.

What makes her think she's in a position to be so choosy?

[Photo one of the many interesting ones that are always up over at 5chw4r7z.]

Christmas like it used to be...

December 31, 2007 09:31 AM

Housing Prices: Blaming Republicans, the rich, etc, on the way down...

December 28, 2007 09:08 AM

...just like on the way up. Mickey Kaus reminds us of the benefit to the housing "crisis":

Are you impressed with a drop in home values of 6.6% over a year? It doesn't seem like such a big correction, given the dramatic run-up in prices over the last decade or so. ... And don't declining prices make housing more... what's the word? ... affordable?** ... This evening NBC Nightly News billboarded a "housing CRISIS." (Link available here.) I thought a "housing crisis" was when people couldn't find housing, not when it got cheaper. (NBC's expert: "It's very, very difficult to find any silver lining." No it's not.) ...

He's absolutely right. Chez NBS has been on the market since October 1, and hasn't sold yet. But when it does sell, we'll be able to take advantage of a huge drop in prices on houses that are bigger, nicer, and in better neighborhoods than what we first thought we could afford. It has been quite enjoyable to see houses that were once outside of our price range fall within it.

And Mickey reminds us of who got all the blame when housing prices shot up so high in the first place:

During the runup in housing prices the air was filled with complaints from the left that the rich were bidding up the value of housing, which was becoming unaffordable for ordinary Americans whose wages were rising only slowly, etc.. Now that this process is unwinding, much of this affordability problem is presumably being corrected.

Right again. Mrs. NBS and I are constantly astounded when we watch those HGTV "Flip that House" type of shows, and they profile some complete dump in California that lists for $650,000 while still in an unrenovated crack-house-infested-with-feral-cats condition. How can anyone afford to live out there? Especially the working class? How can they possibly save up for a decent down payment?

Now that prices on the coasts are falling so dramatically, maybe people who are just starting out in life will be able to put more than 5% down, and thus won't lose all of their equity during a price slump? And I do feel sorry for the people who are losing their homes, don't get me wrong. But why didn't they know that if you can't put 20% down, you can't afford the house? That's been the rule of thumb for decades.

How'd that enormous flat screen get in my slum?

December 26, 2007 02:48 PM

Meet Sharon Jasper. She lives in Section 8 housing in New Orleans. She is not happy with her lot in life:

A HANO voucher covers her rent on a unit in an old Faubourg St. John home, but she said she faced several hundred dollars in deposit charges and now faces a steep utility bill.
"I'm tired of the slum landlords, and I'm tired of the slum houses," she said.
Pointing across the street to an encampment of homeless people at Duncan Plaza, Jasper said, "I might do better out here with one of these tents."

Get that? She might do better in a homeless encampment.

Now meet Sharon Jasper's tv:

Sharon says: "I might be poor but I don't like to live poor. I thank God for a place to live but it's pitiful what people give you."

Sharon, I give you 28% of my income every April 15. The only thing that's pitiful is that I don't have a 60 inch flat screen tv, and you're a welfare queen and you do. Where are my housing vouchers? Where's my flat screen tv? I don't like to live poor, either. It's pitiful what people give you. I'm still waiting for some stranger to come along and give me my flat screen tv. Where the hell is my new flat screen tv?

HT: Nixguy.

UPDATE: Oh my God, she's even worse than I thought.

The paps confront a pregnant Jamie Lynn...

December 24, 2007 10:18 AM

So much better than slogging through "We Three Kings of Orient Are"

December 23, 2007 10:44 AM

The text:

Three kings from Persian lands afar To Jordan follow the pointing star: And this the quest of the travellers three, Where the new-born King of the Jews may be. Full royal gifts they bear for the King; Gold, incense, myrrh are their offering. The star shines out with a steadfast ray; The kings to Bethlehem make their way, And there in worship they bend the knee, As Mary's child in her lap they see; Their royal gifts they show to the King; Gold, incense, myrrh are their offering. Thou child of man, lo, to Bethlehem The kings are travelling, travel with them! The star of mercy, the star of grace, Shall lead thy heart to its resting-place. Gold, incense, myrrh thou canst not bring; Offer thy heart to the infant King.

While the choir sings:

How brightly shines the morning star With grace and truth from heav'n afar The Jesse tree now bloweth Of Jacobs stem and David's line For thee, my Bridegroom, King divine My soul with love o'er floweth Thy word, Thy word, Jesu, Jesu Inly feeds us, rightly leads us, life bestowing. Praise, O praise such love o'er flowing.

Sublime.

Why it is very important to be honest with your attorneys...

December 21, 2007 01:06 PM

Here we have Jamie Lynn Spears' attorneys, threatening to sue the National Enquirer for reporting a few months ago that Ms. Spears is pregnant:

“Ms. Spears is a devout Christian with a spotless reputation, who lives in accordance with the highest moral and ethical standards in accordance with her faith.
There is no “rumor” concerning Ms. Spears’ (non-existent) pregnancy, except perhaps for the baseless “rumor” just now being created by the National Enquirer.
Ms. Spears is not pregnant. It is pathetic for the National Enquirer to attempt to create a wholly baseless “rumor” that Ms. Spears is pregnant, so it can run a malicious story and false story which would be emotionally devastating to a morally upright 16 year old girl.”

Which lead the National Enquirer to leak the Spears threat letter to Perez Hilton, who published it with unhesitant glee. Hilarious.

Is it really a gift if you had to buy it for yourself? With your own tax dollars?

December 20, 2007 12:41 PM

It's enough to make your stomach churn. And Mom NBS, don't show this to Dad NBS. He'll blow a gasket.

Bonus question: What losing Democratic primary candidate once proudly declared "I don't want to be Santa Claus?" Triple Bonus points if you can explain why Hillary does.

If dogs don't get to go...

December 19, 2007 06:07 PM

... I don't want to either. From the Enquirer:

With almost all the pomp and circumstance befitting an officer’s funeral, Alec, Monroe’s police dog was buried this afternoon at the Pines Pet Cemetery near Lebanon.
Alec, a 9-year-old black German Shepherd, died unexpectedly a week ago after suffering a seizure and a stroke after finishing his shift with Officer Gregg Myers....

Police officers and 19 dogs from at least 14 departments in Greater Cincinnati and Dayton looked on as poems about the bravery and loyalty of police dogs were read graveside where Alec’s dark-stained pine casket was draped with the American flag.

Another flag flew at half-staff in the special section for service dogs where Alec will be buried later today.

Stories were shared about some of Alec’s best qualities before Mason Police Honor Guard fired a 21-gun salute.

The Rev. Brad Olson, pastor of Monroe United Methodist Church, finished the service with a prayer that Alec would make it to heaven.

“We pray you will welcome him into your eternal kingdom,” he said.

Video, here.

White House Christmas, interesting on two fronts

December 17, 2007 09:06 AM

From Lisa Schiffren, writing in The Corner at National Review:

Each year instead of the usual Christmas card, my friend Diana Bannister sends out the official White House Christmas tree ornament. Despite our treelessness, we always look forward to getting them, and hanging them from a sconce. This year, the White House ornament features a sepia-toned scene of the wedding of Grover Cleveland and Frances Folsom. That was the very first White House wedding, in 1886.
I am going out on a limb here and presuming that Laura Bush chose the scene on the 2007 ornament. I suspect that it foreshadows a White House wedding to come for the engaged Jenna.

Here's hoping it's before the general election, as it will generate lots of goodwill towards the Republican administration. And piss off all the right people in the process.

The Cleveland/Folsom match sounds like it was interesting:

While there have been several White House weddings for presidential daughters, Grover Cleveland's was the only wedding of a president himself. He was, at the time an "imposing" bachelor of 49, "just under 6 feet tall, and almost 300 lbs." Frances, a lovely young woman of 21, had been Cleveland's ward since the age of 12, when her father, who was Cleveland's law partner, died. In the accompanying booklet, the White House Historical Association tells us that "the public was captivated." (Not so clear what we would make of that today.)

Talk about a question that does not need to be answered. The public today would be mortified.

Apparently Barbara Walters is keeping the Christ in Christmas by making normal people sit back and yell "Oh, CHRIST!"

December 14, 2007 12:20 AM

Can you believe? Does she even know the Old Testament isn't just a Christian thing? And doesn't she remember the card she got last year? The White House Christmas cards since the Bushes have been in have always quoted the OT, at least in the ones we've gotten (do not be impressed by this, they send out a blue billion).

HT: Today's Laura Ingraham Show, and Stand Firm.

Now I understand the "green" shopping movement...

December 13, 2007 12:31 PM

...it's an idiot tax, like lottery tickets. Economic natural selection, but for rich, coastal people. From The New York Times:

Some designs marketed as environment-friendly might include only a fraction of organic cotton, or a tag made of recycled paper. And some so-called green fashion may be downright silly, like the Goyard canvas shopping tote shown in the Barneys “Have a Green Holiday” catalog: the bag is $1,065, plus $310 for painted monogramming of a triangular recycle symbol in gold. The canvas, the catalog says, is “100% recyclable.”

Isn't it good to know you can recycle that $1,065 canvas bag ($1,375, if you get it monogrammed)? What a great stewardship of resources!

And the old patchwork quilt has come full circle. At Barney's, you can get a Duro Olowu dress that is made from a patchwork of “recycled fabric.” And by that, he means "a mix of his own prints and some original, unused samples of leftover couture textiles he found."

It retails at $7,600.

Camille Paglia in Romney's Religion Speech

December 12, 2007 07:20 PM

The atheist was not offended:

Romney's move may have been tactically necessary to counter evangelical Protestants' rejection of Mormonism as a cult, but the speech wasn't as conceptually developed as it should have been. As an atheist, I wasn't offended by Romney's omission of nonbelievers from his narrative of American history. On the contrary, I agree with him that the founders of the U.S. social experiment were Christians (even if many were intellectual deists) and that our separation of church and state entails the rejection of an official, government-sanctioned creed rather than the obligatory erasure of references to God in civic life.
But what does Romney mean by the ongoing threat of a new "religion of secularism"? The latter term needs amplification and qualification. In my lecture on religion and the arts in America earlier this year at Colorado College, I argued that secular humanism has failed, that the avant-garde is dead, and that liberals must start acknowledging the impoverished culture that my 1960s generation has left to the young. Atheism alone is a rotting corpse. I substitute art and nature for God -- the grandeur of man and the vast mystery of the universe.

Amen, Amen. Or something like that. If you can't believe in God, at least believe in art and nature.* This sixties secular humanism crap has got to go.

*How's that for pathetically typical Anglo-Episcopal evangelism?

And from the "why didn't another loved one step in and stop this" file...

...we have this obituary from Sunday's New Orleans Times-Picayune, which was "composed, written, and submitted by [the decedent's grieving widow]. All thoughts, opinions and declarations in it are ENTIRELY hers and do not reflect input from any other persons, LIVING OR DEAD:"

EVANICK Robert Bruce Evanick (always known as Bruce to those who loved him - and those who employed him and exploited his work ethic) -- died Tuesday afternoon, December 4th, 2007. A massive heart attack killed him - despite the heroic efforts of many physicians, surgeons and nurses - in a waiting area at Ochsner Hospital. He was not an inpatient there. He was there to provide company and comfort to Brenda, his wife, whom he loved and supported, in all ways, for 32 years. Her heart is broken. He died a horrendous death, on the floor of the waiting room, at Brenda's feet. To her, he was the most kind, most gentle, and most generous person she has ever known. His death should be a warning to all those who believe that they are being used by insensitive employers. He deserved better, both in life and death. Bruce had been seduced into a sedentary and high stress life style after he moved to New Orleans by the promise of "big money" from a corporate defense law firm. Essentially, his succumbing to that seduction and his devotion to duty caused his death. Of the many shareholders in the firm for which he labored, only one took the personal initiative to call Brenda to offer her personal condolences.

Oh my. But enough about his job, tell us about his personal life!

Several colleagues believe that Brenda and Bruce were divorced. This is not true. They lived apart for several years but were in friendly communication, especially enjoying Sunday breakfasts together....

And his passions! What were his passions?!?

Bruce was brilliantly intelligent, with an impressive knowledge of the law and many other disciplines. Bruce's encyclopedic knowledge of sterling silver -- including the most rare and sought after makers and patterns - put him far above the average collectors. He also knew textiles intimately, including old and new quilts, embroideries from ancient to modern, laces, silks, and all forms of the highest quality handwork in fabric and thread. His appreciation of textiles included loving the custom made shirts that Brenda designed and constructed for him....

Talking about how much the decedent appreciated your own talents. Not good for an obituary. And why bring up the endanged Rothschilds Mynah birds? Or the bromeliads? The goldfish pond? The what you say? Well, here:

While residing in York, PA, Bruce was very much involved in the care of a large collection of exotic birds that he and Brenda collected and kept and propagated. They received permission from the federal government to keep and attempt to propagate the crucially endangered Rothschilds Mynahs. Bruce and Brenda succeeded in raising four Rothschilds (Bali) Mynahs, hand-feeding them from the day they hatched in an incubator. They also raised hundreds of rare and delicate finches and softbilled birds and exhibited them all across the USA. They won many awards, including "Exhibitor of the Year" and "Outstanding Grassroots Activist" awards for supporting the captive breeding programs for rare and endangered species. They expanded that loving care into founding and operating a wild bird rescue agency that treated and released native wild birds that had been orphaned or injured. They released many hundreds of them back to the wild. That organization still flourishes and serves today in the care of dear friends of Bruce and Brenda. While still in Pennsylvania, Bruce became a successful gardener. He expanded that knowledge and skill in Louisiana. With Brenda he amassed a collection of rare orchids, ferns, ivies and bromeliads that comprise a lush garden at their Algiers Point home. Bruce had a fabulous goldfish pond built for Brenda as a birthday gift and it still sparkles and gurgles in their garden. Bruce's death leaves a huge void in the world. It is truly a sin and a shame that only one of his fellow shareholders were moved to personally console his widow.

I think, what she's trying to say is, is that only one of his fellow shareholders called her after he died, and that she would have appreciated it if more had done so. So what's she going to do about it?

He loved her to his last breath and would have been deeply saddened by their cold attitude. Bruce is survived by two siblings from whom he was estranged. [ed. an estrangement which, I am sure, the author of the obit played no role in, whatsoever]. The firm will be holding a Memorial Service in their office sometime on Monday, December 10, 2007. It is not known if they would welcome people from outside the firm and the firms prestigious client list. Brenda will n