Nasty, Brutish & Short

Europe Archives

Well, here's one reason to vote for McCain...

June 20, 2008 08:01 AM

...it will tick off all the right people.  Like the French.  Byron York has lunch in Paris, and discusses it with one of them:

In the European mind, Guantanamo is one of the centers of evil in the world, a dungeon where George W. Bush commits unspeakable acts on innocent Muslims who just happened to be on a battlefield in Afghanistan or Pakistan when U.S. troops captured them.

She says the prisoners in Gitmo have been denied their constitutional rights.

I say they are enemy combatants; they have rights under international treaties, but not American constitutional rights.

But they have “global rights,” she insists.

What are “global rights”? I ask.

There’s no precise definition, but as far as I could tell, “global rights” appear to be American constitutional rights applied to the entire planet. It’s an astounding notion, given that American constitutional rights definitely do not apply across the entire planet — not even in places like, well, France.

A lot of the English aren't much better:

I have a friend in London, very Euro in outlook, who is terrifically frustrated and worried about the election.

His chief concern: the role of Americans. “It’s a pity that Americans are the ones who elect the president,” he says. “It would be much better if the people of the world voted on the American president.”

And guess who would be elected in such a scenario? Here’s a hint: It’s not John McCain.

Basically, it's us against the world.  And by us, I mean red state people.

From the "I wish I wrote it department..."

February 14, 2008 09:33 AM

...Iowahawk chimes in with:

Heere Bigynneth the Tale of the Asse-Hatte.

An Archbishop of Canterbury Tale

 

1  Whan in Februar, withe hise global warmynge

2  Midst unseasonabyl rain and stormynge

3  Gaia in hyr heat encourages

4  Englande folke to goon pilgrimages.

5  Frome everiches farme and shire

6  Frome London Towne and Lancanshire

7  The pilgryms toward Canterbury wended

8  Wyth fyve weke holiday leave extended

9  In hybryd Prius and Subaru

10  Off the Boughton Bypasse, east on M2.

11  Fouer and Twyntie theye came to seke

12  The Arche-Bishop, wyse and meke

13  Labouryte and hippye, Gaye and Greene

14  Anti-warre and libertyne

15  All sondry folke urbayne and progressyve

16  Vexed by Musselmans aggressyve.

17  Hie and thither to the Arche-Bishop's manse

18  The pilgryms ryde and fynde perchance

19  The hooly Bishop takynge tea

20  Whilste watching himselfe on BBC.

Read the whole thing.

Romney's Speech

December 6, 2007 11:15 AM

Spectacular.

And now, we know how he died.

October 11, 2007 03:26 PM

Who, you ask?  Count Gottfried Alexander Leopold Graf von Bismarck-Schonhausen!  We profiled his obituary back in July, because it began as few obituaries do:

Count Gottfried von Bismarck, who was found dead on Monday aged 44, was a louche German aristocrat with a multi-faceted history as a pleasure-seeking heroin addict, hell-raising alcoholic, flamboyant waster and a reckless and extravagant host of homosexual orgies.

It's an awful lot to put on a tombstone, but at least he managed to get in in the first sentence of his Telegraph obit.  And back in July, NBS commeter Dr. Mabuse asked, "But what did he die of?"  And now we know.  He'd injected himself with cocaine once an hour, for 24 hours.

And on a totally unrelated sidenote: This does kind of remind me of the time the Enquirer was interviewing my mom for my grandmother's obit and the reporter had never heard of "Vassar."  We still shake our heads in wonder over that.  [A weird obituary story is the only link between my grandmother and Count Gottfried von Bismark, lest you be wondering how he put me in mind of her.  She was not flamboyant waster or a reckless and extragagant host of homosexual orgies.  Well, not unless you count the times she'd have in her antiques appraiser.  That always got pretty crazy.]

Notable Quotable: Albert Einstein on Freedom

October 4, 2007 08:52 AM

Being a lover of freedom, when the revolution came in Germany, I looked to the universities to defend it, knowing that they had always boasted of their devotion to the cause of truth; but, no, the universities immediately were silenced. Then I looked to the great editors of the newspapers whose flaming editorials in days gone by had proclaimed their love of freedom; but they, like the universities, were silenced in a few short weeks. …
Only the Church stood squarely across the path of Hitler's campaign for suppressing truth. I never had any special interest in the Church before, but now I feel a great affection and admiration because the Church alone has had the courage and persistence to stand for intellectual truth and moral freedom. I am forced thus to confess that what I once despised I now praise unreservedly.

Albert Einstein, TIME, 23 September 1940

HT: Andrew Cusack

Thanks to Global Warming, Entire Point of Colonizing the Americas Now Realized!

September 17, 2007 12:54 PM

Yes, it's true.  The Northwest Passage is now open for thru traffic.  If this had happened 400 years ago, we could have gotten our opium directly from China instead of cocaine from South America.  So life as we know it today would be much, much different.  Yay, global warming!

I say call me when it's warm enough for tourism potential. 

Below: A young woman reassures her sea captain father that yes, one day we will be able to get poisonous dog food and toys containing dangerous quantities of lead shipped directly to the East Coast.

Image:Millais - Überfahrt nach Nordwest.jpg

The Northwest Passage, by John Everett Millais (1874).

HT: Dr. Mabuse, who says "Quick!  Someone call the Queen!  The Northwest Passage is open!"

Major Terrorist Attack Thwarted in Germany...

September 6, 2007 08:24 AM

...the target were U.S. military bases, and the plan was to be executed on Tuesday (September 11):

Prosecutors and police painted a picture of a ruthless cell of Al-Qaeda-linked fanatics, willing to die in suicide attacks with bombs more powerful than those used in the July 7 attacks in London in 2005.

Prosecutors said the attacks were planned at Frankfurt airport, Germany's biggest and busiest, and the Ramstein Airbase - the Pentagon's largest outside of the US.

Other US bases, civilian airports, a nightclub and pub were on the terrorists' target list.

Germany's chief prosecutor, Monika Harms, said the plan was to construct massive car bombs and cause "as much loss of life as possible".

"We have stopped what would certainly have been the worst terror attacks in Germany," he added.

Why don't these things get more press coverage?  It is on the front page at Fox's website, but over at CNN (as of 9:01), it's not even mentioned.  They do find these items newsworthy, though: "Man's arm stuck in meat grinder for 2 hours," "5 Mistakes Parents Make with Newborns," "Squirrel attacks, bites tot, trooper," and my personal favorite, "Peeping Tom Wants 10K Porn Stash Back."

Is it any wonder CNN's ratings are in the tank?

From the "Making NBS Seem Mainstream" Department

July 16, 2007 09:26 PM

Last week I introduced you all to someone who is even more conservative than I, this week, I give you someone more snobby.  Do check out the writings of one Rafal Heydel-Mankoo, and his blog, Reflections of a Young Fogey.  Mr. Heydel-Mankoo is an historian, honours consultant, protocol and etiquette consultant, and a royal and political commentator.  He is also the editor of Burke's Peerage & Gentry, and the grandson of Polish aristocrats Baron Adam Heydel and HSH Princess Karolina-Katarzyna Jablonowska. 

He also appears to be about 30, thus making him rather young to have devoted a career to monitoring other people's breeding.  I'm a Colonial Warrior, but I don't try to make a living off of it.  It would be fun to have him at a Warrior's event, though--mostly because he's significantly under the average age of 70, and also because he probably doesn't approve of Colonials Who Are Warriors.  A monarchist could really stir things up.  One gets the sense from reading his blog that he is definitely peeved we won the Revolutionary War.

Here's a sample:

Monarchists, traditionalists and historians gathered en masse yesterday evening in the dignified surroundings of London's Travellers Club library to honour the Restoration of the Monarchy in 1660; thus marking the end of 11 years of hated, puritanical republican dictatorship. The Royal Stuart Society organises this splendid annual dinner on or around Oak Apple Day, May 29th, King Charles II's birthday and the date of his triumphal entry into London.

He then goes into a lengthy discussion of The Royal Stuart Society, and its aims:

The Society gladly recognises that those who form its membership are likely to have a varied range of particular interests. For some it will primarily be support for the institution of monarchy and the upholding of monarchical institutions against attack from their opponents. This support may favour, for instance, the legitimist stance based on hereditary principles and exemplified in the Jacobite movement and tradition after 1688. Adherents of this position will look with favour on the senior and direct hereditary heirs of the Royal House of Stuart although as our page on ‘Succession’ makes clear, none of those heirs has claimed any or all of the thrones of the British Isles since 1807. Other members of the Society will support or find acceptable the ‘parliamentary’ monarchy created by the Act of Settlement (1701) and now embodied in the reigning House of Windsor. For all there will be a consensus based on the desirability of having a monarchy rather than a republic. Closely linked with support for monarchy, members are likely to favour organised society in these islands being of a Christian, civilized and traditionalist nature. In a more general way they will favour co-operation with other credible monarchist bodies such as the International Monarchist League to support monarchical forms of government worldwide.

The Colonial Warriors have a rather different charter, but we do allow membership to descendants of those who fought for the Crown.  So we'd welcome members of The Royal Stuart Society to join our "hated, puritanical republican" brood.  Apparently, though, the feeling is not mutual.

But I do have something that Mr. Heydel-Mankoo and I surely do agree on.  True story: A few years ago, I was in the Henry VII Lady Chapel at Westminster Abbey, near the stone that reads "The Burial Place of Oliver Cromwell 1658-1661."  And hand to God, this obese tourist woman who was standing next to me exclaimed:

"Awwwwwwwww.  He only lived to be three years old!"

If we hadn't been in a Church, I would have just unloaded on that woman.  I'm trying to take in the surroundings, and then there's this idiot.  If you are that stupid, you need to keep your mouth shut.  Those were the years that he was interred her, you fool.  Oliver Cromwell was not a baby.  He was a brutal dictator who got dug up, hanged, and decapitated after the Restoration of the Monarchy.  Not a baby.

Anyway, I'd like to think Mr. Heydel-Mankoo and I would share a common disdain for stupid people.  And both of us would probably would like this photo:

It's the Henry VII Lady Chapel at Westminster Abbey, sans fat, ignorant tourists.

For those of you who think NBS is too conservative...

July 8, 2007 10:45 PM

... you really need to check out Andrew Cusack's blog.  He's young, extremely intelligent, a great writer, and an American who doesn't even believe in the Declaration of Independence.  Yes, he's a monarchist.  Talk about diversity of opinion!  You don't run into many monarchists these days.

It takes a special kind of person to post on the Fourth of July the following words: "Two hundred and thirty-one years ago today, the tragedy of our people commenced."  He then has a picture of George III alongside a picture of George W. Bush, and says he prefers the former.  Misguided, I know, but a fascinating perspective.

And he has some great things to say about Sewanee.  Check out his feature "Maces of America," a "series of post covering the history, design, and use of ceremonial maces in the United States."  In it, he writes of Sewanee:

The University of the South, which sits on a 10,000-acre domain in Sewanee, Tennesee, is in my opinion the St Andrews of America. To my knowledge it is the only university on this side of the Atlantic which comes close to, and in many regards exceeds, the Universitas Sancti Andrea apud Scotus in the maintenance of tradition.

High praise, my friends.  High praise.  Do check out his blog.  It's so well-written that you may find the comment sections too intimidating.  But go there and lurk.

And now the French left is mad at their new President because he jogs

July 6, 2007 10:04 PM

No, I'm not joking.  From the Times of London:

President Sarkozy has fallen foul of intellectuals and critics who see his passion for jogging as un-French, right-wing and even a ploy to brainwash his citizens.

You got it.  Jogging is un-French, right-wing, and a brainwashing ploy.  C'est incroyable!

Attacks on Mr Sarkozy’s pastime, which he has made a symbol of his presidency, began on the internet as soon as he bounded up the steps of the Elysée Palace in shorts when he took office in May. That moment has become the icon of his hyperenergetic administration. The grumbling has now moved to television and the press.

“Is jogging right wing?” wondered Libération, the left-wing newspaper. Alain Finkelkraut, a celebrated philosopher, begged Mr Sarkozy on France 2, the main state television channel, to abandon his “undignified” pursuit. He should take up walking, like Socrates, Arthur Rimbaud, the poet, and other great men, said Mr Finkelkraut.

Jogging is not right-wing, you idiots.  You want right-wing, try brush clearing.  I love brush clearing.  It is satisfying and healthful.  But not for the French, who don't care about such things:

“Western civilisation, in its best sense, was born with the promenade. Walking is a sensitive, spiritual act. Jogging is management of the body. The jogger says I am in control. It has nothing to do with meditation.”

How arrogant.  And unintellectual to not realize the connection between a sound body and sound mental health.  Exercise literally cleans the brain.  It scrapes out all the junk, and helps you think clearly.  And to think the French left claims the mantle of Western Civilization!  It's not theirs, and they obviously only claim it when it suits them.

Mr Sarkozy’s habit infuriates his critics – and some supporters – because he flaunts it so hard. Le running du Président, often clad in his favourite NYPD T-shirt, has become a ritual, like King Louis XIV’s rides at Versailles....

The NYPD t-shirt must really make them mad.  Perhaps that is what this is all about?

Until “Speedy Sarko” won office, French heads of state shunned physical exercise in public. The late François Mitterrand was privately partial to golf, but the reflective stroll was his public trademark. Jacques Chirac, Mr Sarkozy’s predecessor, was famous for his energy, but in public he moved at walking pace and in suit and tie.

What a hideous culture they have.  No public exercise for their leaders?  Disgusting. 

Le jogging, originally known as le footing and now more fashionably as le running, caught on in France, as elsewhere, in the 1980s and eight million claim to indulge. But Mr Sarkozy has rekindled a French suspicion that the habit is for self-centred individualists such as the Americans who popularised it. “Jogging is of course about performance and individualism, values that are traditionally ascribed to the Right,” Odile Baudrier, editor of V02 magazine, a sports publication, told Libération....

I love that.  "Jogging is of course about performance and individualism, values that are traditionally ascribed to the Right."  Isn't amazing that someone would say that like it's a bad thing?