Nasty, Brutish & Short

Media Archives

The Blogging Blondes. Much to my complete surprise, I know them.

July 8, 2008 09:19 PM

Well, one of them anyway.

I got a text from a mutual friend yesterday, all "you have to turn on the homer right now!" So I did. Since it was the radio, it took me a minute to figure it out. Especially because the blogging blonde was not blonde the last time I saw her. She looked better brunette, but I have to say, the new color suits her personality better.

I think the most amusing thing is, they aren't even blogging.

Local WASP Curtis Sittenfeld to Publish "Thinly Veiled Novel" About Laura Bush

July 7, 2008 02:21 PM

How thinly veiled?  This thinly veiled:

A kind, bookish only child born in the 1940s, Alice learned the virtues of politeness early on from her stolid parents and small Wisconsin hometown. But a tragic accident when she was seventeen shattered her identity and made her understand the fragility of life and the tenuousness of luck. So more than a decade later, when she met boisterous, charismatic Charlie Blackwell, she hardly gave him a second look: She was serious and thoughtful, and he would rather crack a joke than offer a real insight; he was the wealthy son of a bastion family of the Republican party, and she was a school librarian and registered Democrat. Comfortable in her quiet and unassuming life, she felt inured to his charms. And then, much to her surprise, Alice fell for Charlie.

Radar has more scoop, and it's even worse than you might expect:

On the heels of two best-selling books, (Prep, The Man of My Dreams), young, Iowa-trained [ed.  Cincinnati-bred, her sister was in my class at Seven Hills, her dad Paul, is a principal at Baird] author Curtis Sittenfeld is about to release her most controversial book yet—a thinly veiled novel based on Laura Bush's life that is sure to send the White House into a fury.

According to Radar, the book describes "Alice's" trip to get an abortion administered by her grandmother's lesbian lover.  Since it's a "novel," you see, it doesn't have to be true. 

Here's another repulsive tidbit: It also describes "Alice" having sex with the brother of the boy she killed.  Now Laura Bush was in a teenage car accident that took the life of a friend of hers.  But of course, there's no evidence she had a relationship with the dead friend's brother, much less did this:

[H]e pushed me back against the mattress, straddled me, and leaned forward to roll his face between my breasts, pressing them against his cheeks and licking my nipples, his stubble rubbing not unpleasantly against my skin, and the more he grabbed and thrashed, the more the grabbing and thrashing seemed to stir rather than satisfy his desire. He pulled off my pants and underwear at the same time—I was wearing blue jeans, and he had to unbutton and unzip them first—and then I was naked except for my socks, which were white with lace trim. He tugged me upward and flipped me over, and when he said, 'No, you have to be on your knees,' it was the first time either of us had spoken in several minutes.

As far as thinly veiled novels go, I'd say this is clearly in the despicable camp.  It least Kitty Kelly used real names when she was making shit up, Curtis.

I expect the Seven Hills alumni mag will produce a fawning review.  I saw that because my expectations of my alma mater are so pathetically low.  Perhaps the book will be too awful, even for their standards.  But I doubt it.

UPDATE: Yes, I realize that for some inexplicable, blogospheric reason, you can't comment on this post.  I don't know why.  Sorry.

Will Smith appeals to original intent to get us to rally 'round Obama

June 23, 2008 04:59 PM

No seriously, he really did.  Here he is being interviewed by Matt Lauer on the Today show (which after this interview they should just go ahead and rename "Dumb and Dumber"):

LAUER: Do you think people can't get behind America led by John McCain?

SMITH: You know I just, there, there are, there are certain ideas that I believe Barack stands for that are fundamental that the forefathers of this country wrote down on paper that we're all supposed to pay attention to, we're not supposed to ignore it and do what we want to do 'cause we have different ideas. And I believe just at his core the, that those ideas just they, they just come of his pores. And I'm, I'm excited to support him.

Yep, that's it.  Obama will put us back on the Founder's Path!  He's just oozing James Madison.  Out of his pores!  Was that flop sweat?  No, it was the Federalist No. 10.

Meanwhile, over at Politico we learn how wonderful Obama was.  As editor of the Harvard Law Review.  This headline made me snort at its ridiculousness:

Obama Kept Law Review Balanced

The sub-head:

Mostly liberal publication ran progressive pieces alongside ones from a Reagan official and a right-wing judge.

Another snort.  What are we supposed to think, that his administration will be a conservative happy land because he published an article written by a Reagan official and right wing judge?  Is the point that Obama was sooooo brave for printing articles by conservative scholars?

The pretentiousness (and the utter untruth) of this passage made me snort a third time:

In Obama's time, as it is today, the Harvard Law Review was one of the most important and distinguished legal publications in the world. Founded in 1887, it is the rare self-supporting legal publication compiled and edited completely by students, typically those attending their second or third year at the prestigious school.

The Harvard Law Review is not even a remotely important legal publication.  No law review is.  Lawyers rarely, if ever, read law review articles.  And if you cite to one in a brief it is highly suspect.  Judges frown on it.  It's kind of like, "What else have you got?  Any actual case law?"  Why cite to some professor's personal or political agenda?  That's what they all are. 

Also, pretty much every law review I am aware of is "compiled and edited completely by students."  That does not make them great, it just makes them possible.  They're basically just vehicles academics use to advance their careers by "getting published," courtesy of indentured servants working for a future pay off (a highly profitable line for their resumes). 

And yes, I have that line on my resume.  What did we run articles on during my law review days?  I don't know, and I don't care.  You just suck it up and work on them.  No one pays the slightest bit of attention to what they are actually about.  In law school, you don't have time to care, and I'm sure Obama didn't.

But lets not let these facts get in the way of talking about how Obama was such a great law review editor.  He let two conservatives get articles past his desk.  Nobless oblige!

Meet Beach Bob

May 12, 2008 04:08 PM

Maybe the lower taxes still don't make Florida worth it?  Meet Beach Bob, retired court reporter.  Current occupation: Plaintiff.  He's suing the Lee County Sherrif's Office.  The Naples News has the background:

Beach Bob likes to sunbathe in a Speedo.

Nearly every cloudless morning for more than 10 years, he’s wheeled his tattered lounger down to the same spot, which he says is due west of where the boardwalk opens onto the sand at Bonita Beach, and sets up camp for the day.

And so his retirement was going. Sun-drenched, uneventful. Until one day a Lee County Sheriff’s deputy stopped by and wrote him a warning for trespassing.

The reason?

“Exposed scrotum,” the notice read. “Never return to Bonita Beach Main Access.”

Beach Bob wasn't going to take that lying down!

He hired a lawyer, studied maps of the Collier-Lee county line, trotted some of the other beach regulars up to Fort Myers to testify on his behalf. They reported the patch of sand he claims every day is in fact south of the Lee border, so Deputy William Dunaske had no business patrolling there anyway.

They said [he] never rolls in the sides of his Speedo like the deputy alleged.

He got the trespassing warning dismissed.  And now he's brought a civil rights claim (he now suffers from insomnia because of the stress).  Here's what would keep me up at night:  Getting subpoened to testify about whether Beach Bob rolls in the sides of his speedo.  Would that be how you'd want to spend your golden years?  You sure you want to move to Florida?

Speaking of golden, here's a picture of Beach Bob:

Work it Beach Bob.  Work it.  If the speedo fits you must aquits!

If you're assuming this is a case of first impression you'd be wrong.  A few years ago our own Miami University up in Oxford was sued by an employee after he was told he could no longer wear a speedo to swim at the university gym.  People got to have their rights!

HT:  Above the Law.

Breaking economic news from the New York Times: People are being forced to live within their incomes!

May 1, 2008 07:10 AM

My times are bad, aren't they?  Per the NYT:

As real estate prices plunge, so does the ability of homeowners to borrow against the value of their homes, crimping a major artery of spending. As banks grow tighter with their dollars in a period of uncertainty, families are running up against credit limits, forcing many to live within their incomes.

First, what's so bad about people living within their incomes? And second, if these people are up against their credit limits, THEY STOPPING LIVING WITHIN THEIR INCOME A LONG TIME AGO.

Maybe these people aren't the victims?  Maybe they're actually the ones who deserve the blame for the bad economy? 

Last night's Reds game, Jesse Jackson and two guys in gorilla suits

April 10, 2008 09:00 AM

Was anyone else watching last night's game on FSN Ohio?  Mrs. NBS and I had it on in the background, and we both glanced up when announcer Jeff Brantley started talking about how Jesse Jackson was in attendance at the game.  And then our mouths fell open when the camera focused in on two guys in the stands--wearing gorilla suits.  

We could not believe it. 

I'm not one to see racism where it doesn't exist, but MY GOD they really did cross the line putting that audio with that video.  I'm wondering if the camera guy thought it was a funny joke, and Jeff Brantley didn't know what was on the screen as he was talking about Jesse Jackson?  Brantley didn't sound like he was saying anything deliberate.

But still--someone needs to look into it.  Surely someone else noticed it besides just us?

A few minutes later Jeff Brantley was talking about some player who got hit in the groin with a baseball--and talking about it in great detail.  Weird, weird, weird.  Mrs. NBS said "Is he drunk?"  It sure seemed like it.  But he kind of always sounds that way.

Big lib implicated in prostitution sting...

April 2, 2008 04:14 PM

Stabenow's husband caught in Troy prostitution sting, police report says

Jennifer Chambers / The Detroit News

TROY -- The co-founder and former CEO of the liberal-progressive Democracy Radio and husband of U.S. Senator Debbie Stabenow was caught in February by a Troy police sting aimed at catching prostitutes, according to a police report.

Thomas L. Athans was stopped Feb. 26 by undercover officers investigating a possible prostitution ring in a room at the Residence Inn near Big Beaver and Interstate 75. Athans paid a 20-year-old prostitute $150 for sex in a Troy hotel but was not arrested, according to police reports obtained through a Freedom of Information Act request by The Detroit News. The police report said officers observed Athans enter a room under surveillance and leave 15 minutes later. Detectives followed and stopped Athans' silver 2002 Cadillac DeVille on Interstate 75 near Square Lake Road.

I do so love that he was arrested in a town called Big Beaver.  That's almost as embarrassing as the report that he left "15 minutes later."  You know they put that part in on purpose. 

And he drives a 2002 Cadillac DeVille.  How typical.  Wonder what he looks like?

Yep, he's pretty much as you would have guessed.

Mike Allen has a PR guy touting his expertise on politicians who get in sex scandals

March 11, 2008 03:41 PM

What a thing to be an expert in.  You'd think he'd try to get people to forget.  So to throw yourself out there as an expert?  Weird.  And so from the Enquirer, we get this: "Allen Feels Sad for Spitzer,"

“I felt a sense of sadness for Gov. Spitzer and his family,” Allen said today. “My heart went out to him and his family.”

Allen volunteered to speak to The Enquirer after a local public relations firm called the newspaper to pitch Allen as an expert on the Spitzer story.

That part was not supposed to make it into print, Enquirer.  Which I'm sure they knew, and did anyway.  It's too funny not to note as aside.

The lede is amusing too:

When New York Gov. Eliot Spitzer went before cameras Monday to apologize for his alleged involvement in a prostitution scandal that could end his political career, Mike Allen knew how he felt.

“To be honest, when I saw (Spitzer’s apology) yesterday, I was the first one I thought of," Allen said.

Still singing in one note: Me me me me me.  Isn't the deep-rooted self-absorption what got him in trouble in the first place?

[For the non-locals: Four years ago, Mike Allen was our County Prosecutor and local GOP chairman, who was sued for sexual harassment by an Assistant Prosecutor (who seemed a little nutty herself) who Allen was having an affair with.  It was a big local disaster, because Allen was up for re-election himself and running the local Bush-Cheney re-election effort.  Oh to have had a blog then!]

John McCain's New Ad...

March 7, 2008 03:58 PM excellent.

Of course, I would never vote for someone because of a campaign ad. But that's just me, and a lot of people don't think that way.

How funny is it that the Democrats are calling each other names, and the McCain campaign is producing video like this?

Ann Althouse has excellent commentary up on the visuals, from the subtle references to "The Color Purple" to the LBJ daisy ad. I suspect there's more there, if you look. This was very, very well thought out.

The more Victoria Wulsin talks, the less people are going to like her

Here she is, chirping away like a Chatty Cathy doll, on the radical left-wing cesspool that is Firedoglake.  Here's her take on crossover voters:

The 2nd District has some very interesting dynamics. Congressman Bob McEwen [OH-R] called this morning to congratulate me. He said that at his dinner table last night, the other six guests - all Republicans - had chosen Democratic ballots and voted for, yep, Vic Wulsin! He says the Repubs want her OUT (he barely lost to her in the ‘06 primary, so remember where he’s coming from) and want a reasonable alternative. So, I’d like to think some of the crossing-over comes from a desire to get Schmidt out. As an epidemiologist, I look forward to crunching some numbers to see where the biggest “crossing-over” occurred, and how that affected the Clinton:Obama ratio and the Wulsin:Black ratio.

Okay, first, why the hell is Bob McEwen calling Victoria Wulsin to congratulate her? Can that man possibly do more to destroy his reputation?  And two: How whacked is Victoria Wulsin if she thinks the reason crossover voters went for her is because they like her better?  Uh no.  The reason they voted for her is for the same reason they voted for Hillary.  Because she's easier to beat in the fall.  Third: What does an epidemiologist know about cross-over voters?  What does she think they are, disease-addled bird flu victims? 

And check out this comment, where she talks about bringing jobs to Southern Ohio by building windmill factories:

Preznit - Great. I think we could also bring jobs to southern Ohio by actually manufacturing the windmills and solar-mills that we’re going to need to become energy independent. We are at the beginning of a paradigm-shift in how we create, use, and conserve energy.

Forget the Ford Plant or anything in Portsmouth.  Let's build windmill factories!  Everyone tilt at windmills!  Come on, let's go.  Tilt, tilt, tilt.  Hey you--you're not tilting far enough.  You need to tilt a little more... to the left.

It's so ridiculous.  And she's got the completely wrong strategy.  Read through all of her comments, and it's pretty clear that she thinks the district has lurched wildly to the left.  She hasn't gotten the memo that Iraq is nowhere near the election issue that it was in 2006.  Iraq is going quite well right now, even The New York Times knows that.  Another memo she hasn't gotten?  The one that says candidates should NEVER leave comments on blogs.  That's what campaign lackeys are for.  Hilarious. 

HT: Nixguy.

UPDATE: WMD has commentary on this as well.  Funny comments ensure, mostly from the prominent local conservative blogger crowd.  I'm guessing this is the last time Bob McEwen calls Victoria Wulsin up for a tête-à-tête.

Jean Schmidt is more popular among Republicans in Ohio 02...

March 5, 2008 09:00 AM

...than John McCain is among Republicans in Texas.  Jean won her district with 57%.  McCain won Texas by 51%.  Texas!

Don't tell me John McCain doesn't still have a lot of work to do convincing Republicans to go out and vote for him. 

Idiot of the Day: The Enquirer's Ray Cooklis

February 29, 2008 09:26 AM

Here he chimes in on William F. Buckley.  Take it away, Ray:

You certainly can argue that Buckley was an ideologue - he almost single-handedly created the modern American conservative movement - but not in the pejorative sense we've infected that word with.

"Not in the pejorative sense we've infected that word with."  Hun?  What does that mean?  I didn't know conservative had a pejorative sense.  And who's the "we" who has infected the word conservative with a perjorative sense?  Since it's coming from a member of the media, I think we can guess who the "we" is. 

And how asinine is the phrase "you can certainly argue that Buckley was an ideologue"?  Hell yes, he was an ideologue.  That was his entire point.

So, who did John McCain appear on stage with, the day after LocalRadioGate '08?

February 28, 2008 10:29 PM

John Hagee, an influential pastor in the "Christian Zionist movement." Whatever the hell that is. Senator McCain was on stage with Pastor Hagee to receive his endorsement. Has Pastor John Hagee ever said anything controversial? Anything John McCain might want to repudiate? I dunno... let's see...

Bill Donohue of the Catholic League is objecting Hagee's extremist writings, particularly his denunciations of the Catholic Church. For example, Donohue pointed to instances in which Hagee has referred to the Catholic Church as, "The Great Whore," an "apostate church," the "anti-Christ," and a "false cult system."

Okay. So we know what he thinks about the Catholics. What about the Jews? Well, Pastor Hagee says that the Jews have been persecuted throughout history because of... what? ... their failure to accept God.

Wanna see Pastor Hagee in action? I bet you do.

But Bill Cunningham? He's the bigot.

McCain Refused to Condem Supporter for Calling Hillary Clinton a B****

Let's go back in history, shall we?  Waaaaaay back to November of last year.  The scene?  Hilton Head, South Carolina, and a woman at a Q&A who asked John McCain:

"How do we defeat the bitch?"

And what did Senator McCain say in response?  Here was the take of his frenemies at The New York Times:

Mr. McCain was obviously uncomfortable, trying to deflect the vitriol with humor and offering to give a translation. But he did not condemn the questioner, instead calling it an “excellent question.”

Here's what I think is an excellent question:  Why the hell should I help John McCain get elected President this November?

From the "still not getting it" department: Mike DeWine on LocalRadioGate '08

DeWine says to the Enquirer:

"I can't believe in the end that voters are going to make a decision in November based on what John McCain said about Bill Cunningham in February," DeWine said.

How quaint.  He thinks the latest uproar with the base is about McCain repudiating Willie.  It's not.  It's not that at all.  It's that this is YET ANOTHER EXAMPLE of McCain throwing a conservative under the bus.  And when you throw enough people under the bus, you will wake up one day and find that there is no one left to speak for you.  Will that be in November?  We'll see.

McCain Local Radiogate '08

February 27, 2008 03:55 PM

Just how many people did the McCain campaign manage to offend when they were in town?  Here we have the producer of 55KRC's morning radio show, chiming in about the treatment he received from the McCain camp.  Take it away, Joe Strecker:

As you know, it's Ohio's turn to be in the spotlight, for the last 2 weeks, I have been pitched and pitched AND PITCHED every person under the sun to stump for Sen. McCain.  As agreed to by his PR, if I put guests on to stump for Sen. McCain, he would be made available to 55KRC when he came to town (2/26)...

Well here is the email reply I received from the McCain camp

"I don't think for tomorrow, things are pretty set by now. " Rebecca - McCain 2008

As you can tell by my response, I was a little upset.

"I am getting a little frustrated.  55KRC is / has a very Conservative base...Much more than a lot of people think.  These are the voters Sen. McCain needs to win over.  Since the election started, most of our callers initially were Thompson fans, then when he dropped out, Paul and Romney fans.  If there are any listeners/voters to win over, it would be 55KRC's.  I hope you reconsider.  We could do just 5 minutes on his drive up from downtown to West Chester?"

Here was my reply.

"I'm sorry but the decision is not mine.  I recomended you to the higher ups for the exact reason you mentioned.  I will try to ask again when I can but right now I am stuck." - Rebecca McCain 2008

I find out at 10:30 yesterday that McCain was on with Mike McConnell, who McCain called "Bob".  I called Rebecca, and when she said on the phone he wasn't available, I told her he is on right now with WLW.  >>>Silence<<< then she told me "Can't you just use their audio??"  You have to be kidding me..I let her know that we will let our listener's know what happened.

Now, I do understand this is a business and we constantly try to scoop the other guys, but for McCain's people to actually go back on their promise and to act the way they acted and treated the station with the listener's he needs to convince, is just reprehensible. This proves to me what kind of person he is.  Why?  You surround yourself with like minded people.  If his 'people' don't care about you '55KRC listener' vicariously he doesn't care about you '55KRC' listener....

What's even funnier is that last night at 9PM, I received a pitch for another guest to stump for McCain.  I don't think I'm going to book them..

I honestly don't know why he'd even consider it.  And it's more than a little concerning that they're willling to put a candidate's supporters on the radio in exchange for the big "get"--i.e. an interview with the candidate himself.  I suppose that's the way the media game is played, but it doesn't speak well of its participants.  When you whore yourself out, Joe, don't be surpised when you get stabbed by jack the ripper.

And again, how stupid is the McCain camp for missing the interview?  Joe is totally right that the Morning Show's audience is exactly the people McCain needs to be reaching out to.  But there's just little or no effort.

It's almost a parody of a well-run campaign.  "Can't you just use their audio?"  Um no.  Have they ever worked with the news media before? 

A reader contributes: Politically Incorrect Ads of Yesteryear

February 22, 2008 09:25 AM

Lose Weight, with Worms

I can envision my ancestors eating sanitized tapeworms to help shed some pounds.  That's just the kind of people we are.  Practical.

Lots of cigarette ads in the bunch:

The Cigarette Even a Doctor Could Love

I like how the Doctor invites you to test Camels in your "T-zone" for thirty days.  T for Throat, T for taste.

And this one?  Well, it reminds me of John McCain:

A Pill for Your Pop

Yes, Thorazine "can control the agitated, beligerent senile and help the patient to live a composed and useful life." 

More Politically Incorrect Ads of Yesteryear are available here.  Thanks to the reader for sending them in.

And today's total lack of class outrage from the Enquirer is...

February 15, 2008 09:43 AM

Crotch shots of teenage boys, now up on the Enquirer's main page:

I honestly don't see how that's not intentional. 

UPDATE: This story has been rolled to the sports section, and the photo placed in the "photo gallery."  The "Triplets' Mom" has been found not guilty, so that's now on the main page.

UPDATE NO. 2: A reader, quite rightfully, pointed out to me tonight that part of the problem is people don't know how to sit properly.  The kid in this photo is old enough to know better.  And should certainly have been warned about creepy "photographers."

Is there anything about this Enquirer article that's not in poor taste?

February 14, 2008 05:30 PM

Even the headline's bad: "Dead Woman Had Unique Laugh."

It's like something from The Onion, but it's for real.  And it gets worse.  Here's the lede:

Kristina “Tina” Griffen loved cats and her life was filled with music.

Griffen, 31, was walking to her University Heights home from a Tuesday night Bogart’s concert when the very drunk woman, fell 20 feet and landed on her head in a University of Cincinnati parking lot.

How poorly written is that?  The first time I read it, I was like "oh that poor woman was just walking home, and then some drunk woman came flying through the sky, 20 feet, and landed on her head."  I was thinking it was like the pig from Graham Greene's "A Shocking Accident."

Anyway, I suppose you can read it both ways, and the bottom line is:

She died instantly.

“She was wearing moccasin-like boots that had no tread. She just slipped on the ice and took a real nasty fall,” said her brother Forrest Griffen, 36, of Fort Mitchell, Ky.

The Hamilton County Coroner’s office, which officially declared Griffen’s death an accident, noted her blood alcohol content was .295 percent, almost four times Ohio’s legal limit of .08 percent.

Her brother noted the irony because his sister knew she was too drunk to drive home, so she tried to walk, cutting through the UC campus.

“That’s why it was a tragedy. She wasn’t doing anything wrong. It was just an accident,” her brother said.

I feel sorry for her family.  Too much information!  I'm all for saucier obits, but "very drunk woman" is a little much to me.  Though with a BAC of .295, it certainly is apt. 

Why not let this poor family be, believing it was the moccasin-like boots that did her in?

Fox News accurately, but accidentally, identifies John McCain's party and home state

February 8, 2008 10:10 AM

New baby fears

January 5, 2008 11:49 PM

So in addition to the "Please God, Don't Let Her Be a Democrat" thing, have I also mentioned that I live in fear that I'm going to be the next Brenda Nessleroad-Slaby?  It's true.  I think it's one of the reasons I was so easy on Brenda Nessleroad-Slaby this summer, after she left her baby to roast in a hot car while she went in to work.  I knew we'd be bringing home a baby, and I knew I could see myself being so absent minded.

In fact, I had a law professor once who began class once in a very rattled manner, and then explained it was because he had been outside his normal routine that morning, and was supposed to drop the kids of at school.  But instead, he went in completely the wrong direction, and didn't realize it until he was parking at the law school, and from the back seat he heard "Dad!!! You were supposed to take us to school!!!!"  It's a good thing they spoke up, or he probably would have left them in there.

I could totally see that happening to me.

So anyway, as we've been looking for a baby friendly new car, I've paid particular attention to the mirrors you get (on some SUVs, they are built-in) that show the back seat.  I've been very focused on things you can get to help you remember not to roast your child.  Turkey timers, I gather, would be considered child abuse.  And there's a big debate about mirrors, because if you're in an accident, they could fall off and konk (or even slice) they baby.  So it's all very complicated, and also a big conspiracy to get you to spend money on some supposedly fool-proof thing. 

But, the good news is, I've come up with what I think it just about the best PSA spot ever, for local radio when it get hot this summer:

Don't Slaby Your Baby.

Classy, isn't it!  700WLW would totally run it, anyway.  Can't you imagine it on billboards all over the tri-state?

Commenting problem. Solved?

Well they appear to be working again, for no reason other than I've been on an anti-spam commenting crusade.  I think cleaning them out was like a blogospheric angioplasty or something. Now every thing is flowing much more properly.

If you've ever scrolled through the archives, you've probably noticed a lot of spam in the comments.  I've gotten lazy about deleting these, because I know most people only read the main page.  Apparently, I've gotten too lazy.  And I think I figured out the source of the problem.  It was this post, which was about a minor kerfuffle I had with the Cincinnati Beacon in August.  They had taken me to task for (supposedly) not knowing the difference between cuckolding and swinging.  In my post, I apologized for my gross ignorance (well, kind of apologized.  As much as I would ever apologize anyway), and clarified that I do, in fact, know what a "hot wife" is.

Well, you can imagine the kind of comment spam this post attracted.  Apparently there are a lot of people trying to peddle their spam wares, and those wares have much to do with cuckolding, swinging, and hot wives.  In fact, since that post went up in August, it has attracted 13,670 comments, from people attempting to sell loyal NBSers all sorts of services, products, website entertainments, etc.  None of which were endorsed by me.  Nor did I get a cut of any proceeds from those of you who got pervy entertainment via links from my comments. 

I discovered this by simply going through old posts, and turning off the comments on old posts that seemed to attract a lot of spam.  Most of them would maybe have 30-100 spam comments, and I'd wipe those out, thinking that all of them, collectively, must have been slowing the system.  And then I got to the post with the 13,670 comments.  The system crashed twice, just while I was deleting them.  And it took forever to get rid of them all.  My commenting problems must have been caused by this minor Cincinnati Beacon kerfuffle.  Who would of thought?  A kerfuffle with Beacon... hardly something worthy of my time.

And as for the spamers, I'm pretty ignorant of how they target what they do.  I assume they have programs that pick out posts that suit whatever they've been hired to peddle, and then they target those posts with lots of spam comments (all of which contain hyperlinks to their products).

But what I don't understand is, why they think someone is going to be reading NBS and getting some anti-Hillary Clinton diatribe and then suddenly decide to link on some pervy hyperlink in the comments.  I get the point of the spam comments, but why the hell leave them here?  Are you all a bunch of pervs?  Is Senator Larry Craig an NBSer?  Are you all secretly interested in cuckolding, swinging and hot wives?  What is with you freaks?

FYI: Comments on this post will be turned of in three days.  If you have anything to say, say it now.

Christmas like it used to be...

December 31, 2007 09:31 AM

How'd that enormous flat screen get in my slum?

December 26, 2007 02:48 PM

Meet Sharon Jasper.  She lives in Section 8 housing in New Orleans.  She is not happy with her lot in life:

A HANO voucher covers her rent on a unit in an old Faubourg St. John home, but she said she faced several hundred dollars in deposit charges and now faces a steep utility bill.

"I'm tired of the slum landlords, and I'm tired of the slum houses," she said.

Pointing across the street to an encampment of homeless people at Duncan Plaza, Jasper said, "I might do better out here with one of these tents."

Get that?  She might do better in a homeless encampment. 

Now meet Sharon Jasper's tv:


Sharon says:  "I might be poor but I don't like to live poor.  I thank God for a place to live but it's pitiful what people give you."

Sharon, I give you 28% of my income every April 15.  The only thing that's pitiful is that I don't have a 60 inch flat screen tv, and you're a welfare queen and you do.  Where are my housing vouchers?  Where's my flat screen tv?  I don't like to live poor, either.  It's pitiful what people give you.  I'm still waiting for some stranger to come along and give me my flat screen tv.  Where the hell is my new flat screen tv?

HT: Nixguy. 

UPDATE: Oh my God, she's even worse than I thought.

The Enquirer says I can make money off this dang blog

Actually, they're just running an AP wire story, but it's interesting nonetheless:

NEW YORK – Zach Brooks pocketed $1,000 this month blogging about the cheap lunches he discovers around midtown Manhattan ($10 or less, preferably greasy, and if he’s lucky, served from a truck).

The site,, is just a year and a half old and gets only about 2,000 readers daily, but it’s already earning him enough each month for a weekend trip to the Caribbean – or in his case, more fat-filled culinary escapades in the city.

In the vast and varied world of blogging, Brooks is far from alone.

It’s no longer unusual for blogs with just a couple thousand daily readers to earn nearly as many dollars a month.

Well, that may be a little bit of an exaggeration, if you ask me.  You'll notice I haven't quit my day job.  Or maybe you all just aren't clicking enough on those google ads.  Click click click!  A reader told me this weekend that she bought one of those Hillary Clinton nutcrackers off my site.  Made me so proud.  It's a good thing to not only support NBS, but the entreprenurial genius behind the Hillary Clinton nutcracker!

I also like this point from the article:

Getting paid might even help validate what may otherwise seem like a silly or obscure obsession.

Amen to that!

Wait till Barbara Walters gets the Christmas Card from the Huckabee White House

December 18, 2007 09:33 AM

She's going to hate it. It's almost worth voting for him just for that reason alone.

Apparently Barbara Walters is keeping the Christ in Christmas by making normal people sit back and yell "Oh, CHRIST!"

December 14, 2007 12:20 AM

Can you believe? Does she even know the Old Testament isn't just a Christian thing? And doesn't she remember the card she got last year? The White House Christmas cards since the Bushes have been in have always quoted the OT, at least in the ones we've gotten (do not be impressed by this, they send out a blue billion).

HT: Today's Laura Ingraham Show, and Stand Firm.

And from the "why didn't another loved one step in and stop this" file...

December 12, 2007 11:13 AM

...we have this obituary from Sunday's New Orleans Times-Picayune, which was "composed, written, and submitted by [the decedent's grieving widow]. All thoughts, opinions and declarations in it are ENTIRELY hers and do not reflect input from any other persons, LIVING OR DEAD:"

EVANICK Robert Bruce Evanick (always known as Bruce to those who loved him - and those who employed him and exploited his work ethic) -- died Tuesday afternoon, December 4th, 2007. A massive heart attack killed him - despite the heroic efforts of many physicians, surgeons and nurses - in a waiting area at Ochsner Hospital. He was not an inpatient there. He was there to provide company and comfort to Brenda, his wife, whom he loved and supported, in all ways, for 32 years. Her heart is broken. He died a horrendous death, on the floor of the waiting room, at Brenda's feet. To her, he was the most kind, most gentle, and most generous person she has ever known. His death should be a warning to all those who believe that they are being used by insensitive employers. He deserved better, both in life and death. Bruce had been seduced into a sedentary and high stress life style after he moved to New Orleans by the promise of "big money" from a corporate defense law firm. Essentially, his succumbing to that seduction and his devotion to duty caused his death. Of the many shareholders in the firm for which he labored, only one took the personal initiative to call Brenda to offer her personal condolences.

Oh my.  But enough about his job, tell us about his personal life!

Several colleagues believe that Brenda and Bruce were divorced. This is not true. They lived apart for several years but were in friendly communication, especially enjoying Sunday breakfasts together....

And his passions!  What were his passions?!?

Bruce was brilliantly intelligent, with an impressive knowledge of the law and many other disciplines. Bruce's encyclopedic knowledge of sterling silver -- including the most rare and sought after makers and patterns - put him far above the average collectors. He also knew textiles intimately, including old and new quilts, embroideries from ancient to modern, laces, silks, and all forms of the highest quality handwork in fabric and thread. His appreciation of textiles included loving the custom made shirts that Brenda designed and constructed for him....

Talking about how much the decedent appreciated your own talents.  Not good for an obituary.  And why bring up the endanged Rothschilds Mynah birds?  Or the bromeliads?  The goldfish pond?  The what you say?  Well, here:

While residing in York, PA, Bruce was very much involved in the care of a large collection of exotic birds that he and Brenda collected and kept and propagated. They received permission from the federal government to keep and attempt to propagate the crucially endangered Rothschilds Mynahs. Bruce and Brenda succeeded in raising four Rothschilds (Bali) Mynahs, hand-feeding them from the day they hatched in an incubator. They also raised hundreds of rare and delicate finches and softbilled birds and exhibited them all across the USA. They won many awards, including "Exhibitor of the Year" and "Outstanding Grassroots Activist" awards for supporting the captive breeding programs for rare and endangered species. They expanded that loving care into founding and operating a wild bird rescue agency that treated and released native wild birds that had been orphaned or injured. They released many hundreds of them back to the wild. That organization still flourishes and serves today in the care of dear friends of Bruce and Brenda. While still in Pennsylvania, Bruce became a successful gardener. He expanded that knowledge and skill in Louisiana. With Brenda he amassed a collection of rare orchids, ferns, ivies and bromeliads that comprise a lush garden at their Algiers Point home. Bruce had a fabulous goldfish pond built for Brenda as a birthday gift and it still sparkles and gurgles in their garden. Bruce's death leaves a huge void in the world. It is truly a sin and a shame that only one of his fellow shareholders were moved to personally console his widow.

I think, what she's trying to say is, is that only one of his fellow shareholders called her after he died, and that she would have appreciated it if more had done so.  So what's she going to do about it?

He loved her to his last breath and would have been deeply saddened by their cold attitude. Bruce is survived by two siblings from whom he was estranged. [ed. an estrangement which, I am sure, the author of the obit played no role in, whatsoever]. The firm will be holding a Memorial Service in their office sometime on Monday, December 10, 2007. It is not known if they would welcome people from outside the firm and the firms prestigious client list. Brenda will not attend.

But it would have been quite interesting, if she had.   

She wraps it all up with a little too much information:

Bruce has been cremated and his remains will be placed in an exquisite wooden box which he loved and will remain with his grieving widow.

Emphasis added (not that it was needed).  HT: Above the Law

Reason why I love the British press, no. 345

December 4, 2007 08:30 PM

They run things like this little gem from the BBC:

"...the tiny bitch was whisked away under an assumed name after receiving about 20 threats."

It's from an article about Leona Helmsley's dog.

HT: Althouse

So flattered to have been asked, so bewildered about what to say

November 29, 2007 03:19 PM

Oh Crap.  I've been asked to participate in a literary roundtable and recommend a bunch of books for the Christmas season at a popular website read by a bunch of smart people.  I feel kind of like the airhead celebrities they profile in Vanity Fair and ask, "What's on your nightstand?"  And they come up with something like Elfriede Jelinek's Einar that their publicist googled and had them say when they filled out Vanity Fair's form and which we all know is total b.s.

Do I just come right one and say uhh... well... I haven't actually, you know, been reading a lot of what you might call "books" lately.  What with the new job and the baby and, um, you know...  all of that.  Also I kind of maybe only have a two minute attention span anymore because of blogs.  So.... I'm not really down with all the latest editions and, like, it's been a while since I've been in a bookstore except to get to the cafe at Joseph-Beth.  You know, so maybe my contribution wouldn't be exactly what you're looking for, which is what people like National Review and New Criterion contributors are reading these days, because that's the kind of people who are contributing to this thing. 

Do I just come right out and say that?  Or should I just recommend Elfriede Jelinek's Einar?  Suggestions, please!

So who did I think won?

Nobody, hand's down.  Huckabee seems personable, but he's lost on the tax issues.  You can just tell he has an improper understanding of the role government is supposed to play. 

Ron Paul...right on the tax issues, but lost, lost, lost on foreign policy.  Why does he play ball with the whackadoos?  The only possible conclusion is that he's a wackadoo, too.  I'm glad he's on the stage though.

McCain's right on foreign policy, but I just can't get over all the crappy ideas he's had in the past about domestic policy.  Campaign finance.  Immigration.  And the way he continually implies that people who are opposed to illegal immigration are racist.  And he doesn't believe in torturing terrorists.  Ridiculous! 

Rudy did well, but came across as petty.  I think he was coached too much.  The attack on Romney for having a "sanctuary mansion" was just silly.  Toss the campaign worker who thought that would be a witty phrase.

As for Thompson?  What can I say?  He's still such a disappointment.  Where's the passion?  Where's the personality?  It's just emptiness.  He barely did one thing during the debate that was memorable.  No wait.  He didn't do ANYTHING during the debate that was memorable. 

So who does that leave?  In my mind, Romney who had the most well-rounded result.  He flubbed a few questions, but overall, the presentation works for me, and so do the policies.  He's personable, but firm.  I call Romney the winner.

I'm still undecided, though.

UPDATE: I accidentally deleted several comments.  I get several thousand spam ones a day, so sometimes accidents happen.  Sorry!

See what happens with the elitists don't know jack about religion?

November 27, 2007 09:19 AM

They are forced to run newspaper corrections, like this one:

A headline last Sunday about a Muslim man and an Orthodox Jewish woman who are partners in two Dunkin’ Donuts stores described their religions incorrectly. The two faiths worship the same God — not different ones.

--From the New York Times "Corrections" section on November 25th.  Christians worship the same one too.  I wonder if they know that? 

HT: Titusonenine

And there's one more book I won't be writin'

November 8, 2007 04:11 PM

Dang, Marc Levin (conservative commentator, attorney, man of all seasons) is out with a new book, Rescuing Sprite:

 Rescuing Sprite: A Dog Lover's Story of Joy and Anguish

I could have written this book.  Why didn't I?  Grrrr. 

Anyway, Mark tells National Review Online:

I wasn’t planning on writing Rescuing Sprite.  As much as we try to plan our lives, life is unpredictable.  I was thinking about writing a book that was more along the lines you mention — about philosophy and politics.  We had actually begun the process of talking to several interested publishers about that project, but then Sprite passed away.  It was a crushing blow to me, as I am sure other dog lovers can relate. I put in very long days.  My radio show finishes at 8 P.M. ET, after which I eat dinner with my dogs every night; I take long walks with them; I talk with them at length. T hey give me enormous pleasure and enjoyment.  They keep me company.  They give me far more than I could ever give them and, in return, they ask for nothing more than something to eat and drink, a warm place to sleep, and some loving attention.

It never occurred to me to adopt a dog from a shelter.  It was my wife’s and kids’ idea, and their persistence, that brought this wonderful dog, Sprite, into our family.

You know, I’d never been to a shelter before.  I’d never given them a first thought, let alone a second thought. But I have since come to know that there are literally millions of dogs (and cats and other animals) who are living in crates or cages in thousands of shelters across the country who are in desperate need of loving families.  They became lost from their families, or were turned in by their owners, or had been abused.  When you go to a shelter, it’s a difficult experience — at least it was for me.  The people there are truly remarkable.  They do something I could never do.  They care for an endless stream of needy animals, and their contributions to society are enormous.  But to see those dogs and cats in those crates, who have to wonder what happened to their world, and who are surrounded by strangers and strange sounds, is heartbreaking.  In most cases, just a few weeks earlier, they were in a loving home.

Anyway, back to your question. It never crossed my mind to write a book like this, until my Sprite passed away. Simon & Schuster and several other publishers wanted me to write a book for them — a political book. Well, this was the book I wanted to write. I had to write it. It was this or nothing.

"Well, this was the book I wanted to write. I had to write it. It was this or nothing."  And guess what?  He wrote it, and Simon & Schuster loved it. 

Read the whole interview, if not the book.  Especially you, Mrs. NBS.  It sounds like you'd love it.

And remember gentle readers, that link to Lab Rescue over there on the blogroll is there for a reason.  Go check it out sometime.

"Well that's your opinion!" One thing you never--ever--say to a Judge. Especially not the fiesty Judge Milian of the People's Court

October 16, 2007 11:56 AM

HT: Above the Law

The Enquirer not only buries the lede, they don't even put the lede in their article

The lead story over at the right now is that the E.W. Scripps Company is going to split into two separate entities.  This is a huge story for the Cincinnati business community.  And people want to know if they'll still have jobs, be transferred, etc. etc.

But the article the Enquirer runs does not even mention whether the newly created companies will keep their corporate headquarters in Cincinnati--a big issue, since media outlets logically belong in L.A. or New York.  You have to go directly to the company's press release to find this information--which is where the Enquirer got all their information for their article.  They practically reprint the press release verbatim.  Except the most important part, and the part their readers will care about. 

I assume the Enquirer will update their story shortly.  But why even put anything out there, when it doesn't even address the first question people will have?

Both new companies are staying by the way.  NBS breaks the news by reading the press release!  Should I insist the Enquirer "credit" NBS as the source? 

"Can't the man have a mid-life crisis in peace? In the animal kingdom such displays often attract a willing mate."

October 15, 2007 09:05 PM

Oh dear.  The Brits are upset one of their better known tv hosts appeared on tv in moleskin trousers.  Maybe he should have used LBJ's tailor?

terry wogan

HT: Jackie Danicki

The Brits call that a lunch box.  Yes, the slogan was new to me to.

UPDATE:  I almost forgot.  This Brit has nothing on Dick Cheney, as photographed during the 2004 campaign.  What's the slogan?  A [Republican] elephant never forgets?

And now, we know how he died.

October 11, 2007 03:26 PM

Who, you ask?  Count Gottfried Alexander Leopold Graf von Bismarck-Schonhausen!  We profiled his obituary back in July, because it began as few obituaries do:

Count Gottfried von Bismarck, who was found dead on Monday aged 44, was a louche German aristocrat with a multi-faceted history as a pleasure-seeking heroin addict, hell-raising alcoholic, flamboyant waster and a reckless and extravagant host of homosexual orgies.

It's an awful lot to put on a tombstone, but at least he managed to get in in the first sentence of his Telegraph obit.  And back in July, NBS commeter Dr. Mabuse asked, "But what did he die of?"  And now we know.  He'd injected himself with cocaine once an hour, for 24 hours.

And on a totally unrelated sidenote: This does kind of remind me of the time the Enquirer was interviewing my mom for my grandmother's obit and the reporter had never heard of "Vassar."  We still shake our heads in wonder over that.  [A weird obituary story is the only link between my grandmother and Count Gottfried von Bismark, lest you be wondering how he put me in mind of her.  She was not flamboyant waster or a reckless and extragagant host of homosexual orgies.  Well, not unless you count the times she'd have in her antiques appraiser.  That always got pretty crazy.]

And while I'm complaining about my fellow Republicans...

October 9, 2007 11:29 AM

...let me also carp on the timing of tonight's Republican debate.  I'm batching it tonight, so I thought I'd have time to watch it.  Liveblog it, no less.  But none of that is possible, because it's at 4:00 in the afternoon.  Who in the hell has time to watch a debate at 4:00 in the afternoon?  All the working (i.e. voting) people are still working.  And the people who aren't working are watching Oprah.  They're not going to flip over to CNBC to watch the Republican candidates talk economic policy.  If a tree falls in the forest, does it still make a sound?  I guess we'll find out.

And no, I'm not satisfied that MSNBC is replaying it at 9:00.  I'm not going to liveblog a taped program!

Notable Quotable: Albert Einstein on Freedom

October 4, 2007 08:52 AM

Being a lover of freedom, when the revolution came in Germany, I looked to the universities to defend it, knowing that they had always boasted of their devotion to the cause of truth; but, no, the universities immediately were silenced. Then I looked to the great editors of the newspapers whose flaming editorials in days gone by had proclaimed their love of freedom; but they, like the universities, were silenced in a few short weeks. …
Only the Church stood squarely across the path of Hitler's campaign for suppressing truth. I never had any special interest in the Church before, but now I feel a great affection and admiration because the Church alone has had the courage and persistence to stand for intellectual truth and moral freedom. I am forced thus to confess that what I once despised I now praise unreservedly.

Albert Einstein, TIME, 23 September 1940

HT: Andrew Cusack

Idiots Delight, Wednesday Edition: The ladies of The View discuss--in all seriousness--whether the earth is round. And at the very end, Barbara Walters is EXTREMELY confused about the internet and where babies come from.

September 19, 2007 10:25 AM

It's been awfully quiet around here

September 17, 2007 08:42 AM

So sorry for the lack of posts here at NBS lately.  The press of every day life has pretty much overwhelmed.  But more on that later.  In the meantime, if you're looking for entertainment, check out this round of Idiots Delight, which we find (predictably) over in the comments section at the Cincinnati Beacon.  There, we find the self-important Dean of Cincinnati debating the race-mongering Nate Livingston over this key question:

Is Steve Black, the guy who is running for Congress, actually black?

If so, someone needs to tell the Camargo Club, stat!

So folks, today's discussion topics are:  Is Steve Black the "It's Pat" of local indentity politics? 

 It's Pat

Can a dark skinned whitie ride to victory with the help of confused African Americans like Nate Livingston?  Has Steve Black out-tanned John Boehner and locked up the minority vote?

One Year Ago on NBS, Six Years Ago in New York

September 10, 2007 11:16 PM

Last year for the 5th Anniversary of September 11, I participated in the 2,996 Project, in which small websites came together to honor each victim of September 11.  It was easy to sign up for, but harder to do.  There's really nothing you can say that does the subject matter justice.  And I struggled in my research, because I couldn't find the material I thought I needed.  Here's what I came up with:

As we mentioned last week, this website is honored to participate in the 2,996 project this year, which commemorates the individuals who were murdered on September 11, 2001.  The response to this project has been so overwhelming, that far more than 2,996 private websites have signed up to participate, and the organizers have started through the list a second time.  We encourage everyone to spend some time today, and review some of the tributes that are appearing on the internet.  Each of the lives that were lost five years ago were precious.  We encourage our readers to reflect on those individuals today, and what they meant to those who loved them.

David Ortiz was one of those individuals.  He was a locksmith from Nanuet, New York, who worked for the Port Authority.  He had a wife named Lillian, and two children: Richard, who was 14 years old in 2001, and Crystal, who was 6.  He was very close to his brother, Martin, and his sister, Maria.  We encourage you to think about Lillian, Richard, Crystal, Martin and Maria today.  They think about David often, and you can read some of their thoughts at the guestbook.

David was a family man, with a sense of humor.  When David wasn't working overtime to pay for renovations to their house, he was fishing with his son, spreading joy to those around him, or riding his blue Harley Davidson.  He enjoyed playing practical jokes on his co-workers in the WTC Lock Shop.

David was also one of the heroes of September 11th.  He knew the layout of the World Trade Center complex like the back of his hand.  And after the attacks came, he went back in, to help.  He was one of 13 civilians who was posthumously awarded a Medal of Honor for his service on September 11, 2001.

On September 14, 2003, David's brother Martin and his wife became parents.  Their new son is named David Ortiz.

One year ago on NBS, six years ago in New York, and three years, 362 days ago for a family who lost, and gained.

Dennis Kucinich takes his anti-American Presidential campaign to Syrian TV. No. Not Kidding.

HT: Right Angle Blog

Still MORE on Brenda Nesselroad-Slaby

September 9, 2007 09:56 AM

Kudos to Dan Horn and the Enquirer for writing a story about the Brenda Nesselroad-Slaby case that actually explains the legal issues involved.  Newspapers rarely look at these matters in depth, and it's definitely unusual to see the popular press analyze mental states and what they mean under criminal law.  Oh sure, Dan doesn't throw out the Latin, so I will:

Actus non facit reum nisi mens sit rea.

It means "the act does not make a person guilty unless the mind is also guilty."  There are different mens rea (i.e. mental states) and culpability is based on whether the offending party possessed the mental state that comports with a particular crime.  In the Nesselroad-Slaby case, the necessary mental state is recklessness, and to prove that, you need to show that the offending party perversely disregarded a known risk.  That is different than forgetting something.  As the Prosecutor explained:

"Here's my challenge to anyone who thinks she should have been charged: Do you believe she left her child in there on purpose?" White said. "That's what I have to believe as prosecutor to charge her. That's what the law is."

The law he's referring to is child endangering, which in Ohio requires a parent or guardian to act recklessly by disregarding a substantial risk.

To many, there is little doubt the mother was reckless. But the legal definition of reckless requires proof the mother perversely disregarded a known risk.

"When people hear the word reckless, they say, 'Well, certainly this person was reckless,' " Piper said. "But the legal definition of reckless is way, way higher than the definition we use every day."

White decided the evidence supported Nesselroad-Slaby's claim she forgot her child was in the car. Once he made that decision, criminal charges were out of the question.

If the mother forgot, White said, she could not have disregarded a risk because she didn't know the child was there.

That is why this is completely different than cases where someone leaves a baby in the car while running errands.  In those cases, they haven't forgotten the baby.  They're just leaving it the car, and assuming (wrongly) that nothing is going to happen to it.  When someone does that, they are perversely disregarding a known risk, and they can be charged with child endangering.

One other quick legal point: The purpose of criminal law is two-fold.  It is designed to punish the offending party, and to deter future conduct (either the offending party's future conduct, or someone else's).  In this case, prosecuting Brenda Nesselroad-Slaby would not have a deterrent effect on her or anyone else.  There's zero chance she'll leave a baby in a hot car again.  And as for members of the public, no one is more likely to leave their baby in a hot car just because Brenda Nesselroad-Slaby wasn't prosecuted.  If anything, people are going to look at this tragic situation and be more cautious about their kids, not less.

And as for punishing her, I have to say that the people who think she needs to be punished more are just creepy.  I can think of no worse a punishment than having your child die and have it all be your fault.  The idea that something more should be piled on top of that is just vile.  People need to keep their blood lust in check.  And, they need to watch out for bad karma when they demand that someone else be prosecuted for what was obviously an accident.  It's not something you would want to have happen to you. 

Major Terrorist Attack Thwarted in Germany...

September 6, 2007 08:24 AM

...the target were U.S. military bases, and the plan was to be executed on Tuesday (September 11):

Prosecutors and police painted a picture of a ruthless cell of Al-Qaeda-linked fanatics, willing to die in suicide attacks with bombs more powerful than those used in the July 7 attacks in London in 2005.

Prosecutors said the attacks were planned at Frankfurt airport, Germany's biggest and busiest, and the Ramstein Airbase - the Pentagon's largest outside of the US.

Other US bases, civilian airports, a nightclub and pub were on the terrorists' target list.

Germany's chief prosecutor, Monika Harms, said the plan was to construct massive car bombs and cause "as much loss of life as possible".

"We have stopped what would certainly have been the worst terror attacks in Germany," he added.

Why don't these things get more press coverage?  It is on the front page at Fox's website, but over at CNN (as of 9:01), it's not even mentioned.  They do find these items newsworthy, though: "Man's arm stuck in meat grinder for 2 hours," "5 Mistakes Parents Make with Newborns," "Squirrel attacks, bites tot, trooper," and my personal favorite, "Peeping Tom Wants 10K Porn Stash Back."

Is it any wonder CNN's ratings are in the tank?

More on Dennis Kucinich and his freaky wife

August 31, 2007 10:32 AM

From the Plain Dealer's Openers Blog, we hear of their plans to celebrate their anniversary.  And the Kuciniches want us all to participate:

In an Aug. 22 e-mail titled "Help Celebrate our Wedding Anniversary," Kucinich notified backers that he and Elizabeth were celebrating their second wedding anniversary that week.

"I know we are newly weds and all, but I felt the undying urge to share this occasion with our supporters," Kucinich said in the e-mail.

 Um.  Ew.

"The love Elizabeth and I share encompasses all of the reasons you support our campaign and all the reasons we exist as human beings."

Using the word "love" 17 times, Kucinich proceeded to claim that "the Power of Love" could eliminate world hunger, establish universal health care and return U.S. troops from Iraq. Then he decided to see if "Love" could also generate campaign money by urging e-mail recipients to "share in our celebration."

Tacky.  Tacky.  Tacky.  An unnecessary sexual reference and a shake down for cash.  Hell, it's almost as tacky as some of the ads that are running on this site right now.  I'm making millions, by the way.  Who knew Republicans were such pervs?

I know you've already seen this on the Drudge Report...

August 28, 2007 10:50 AM

... but I'm posting it too because I just love this photo of Winnie Langley celebrating her 100th Birthday:

Winne Langley

Hilarious.  If an American newspaper ran that photo, how many indignant letters to the editor would they receive?

And on the birthday front, check out this creepy email I got from LexisNexis Martindale Hubble: 

Happy birthday from LexisNexis Martindale-Hubbell! We're also celebrating the 10th birthday this year of and we would like to invite you to make a birthday wish with us.

For the past 10 years, has played a critical role connecting lawyers with other lawyers. Each month, more than 700,000 users tap into to find the exact right lawyer to handle their matter or business referral.....

Now we'd like to hear from you about the next cutting edge features we should implement on Share your ideas with us by making a birthday wish on behalf of For each idea you submit, we'll enter your name into a drawing for a 42" plasma television.

So blow out the birthday candles and make a wish for - We hope both your wishes come true! Have the happiest of birthdays and many more!

Yes, it's my birthday.  But I don't think I care for birthday wishes from massive legal research organizations with huge databases.  It just reminds me that they know too much about me, and probably everyone else.  Big Brother is watching you!  I also don't like that they think I'm going to give away a free "idea" in exchange for a chance to win a tv.  How patronizing--they are supposed to be an organization for professionals.

Just how limited are the Enquirer's Republican connections...

... or their headline writers' grasp of politics?  Malia Rulon's article about Mitt Romney's fundraiser here next week is just awful.  First, she passes off his fundraiser as news, because his campaign just announced it yesterday.  We were asked to be on the host committee for this event six weeks ago, and the invitations have been out for at least two weeks.  It's not news.  Maybe it would help if the Enquirer didn't have Washington-based correspondents writing about local events?

She also writes:

The location of Romney's reception wasn't immediately available.

It's at Craig and Frances Linders'.  Why write about facts you don't know?  Especially when it is easy to ask someone who does?

But my big problem is with the headline:

For $2,300, Romney will pose for photo with you.

Yes, that's it.  That's the headline.  Never mind that $2,300 is the going rate for every major Presidential candidate, including the Democrats.  It's really unfair to put it in the headline like that, as if is is something special or unique... or like Romney is the only one who does that.  They all do!

Is Castro dead, and did Perez Hilton break the story?

August 24, 2007 10:16 PM

How delightful to see bitchily delicious mega-celebrity blogger Perez Hilton speaking truth to power about Fidel Castro.  Perez has great resources in the Cuban immigrant community, and this is what they are talking about:

Sources reveal exclusively to that U.S. officials will be holding a press conference shortly to announce the death of Cuban dictator Fidel Castro.

South Florida police organizations are calling in reinforcements before the announcement is made, we’re told. was the first media outlet in the world to break the news of Castro’s death. We posted THIS ITEM on it last week!!!!

A Cuban broke the story of the oppressive ogre’s passing. We are soooo proud and happy!!!

We’re so sad we can’t be in Miami this weekend.

There’s gonna be a big ol’ party en Calle Ocho, mi gente!!!!

In the words of Gloria Estefan

“Quiero my Cuba libre pa que la gente pueda - pa que mi gente pueda bailar!”

listen to this while you dance

There are plenty in Hollywood who could learn a lot from Perez.  The Drudge Report (one week after Perez) is leading with the news that Castro death rumors are sweeping Miami.  We've heard them before though.  Let's hope this time they're true.

Hollywood Hates

An entry, from Melissa Etheridge's partner's blog:

so if i blog
about what an idiotic, parasitical, country-raping piece of shit george w. bush is, i could
go to jail?

george bush
you are a criminal
you are raping our country of our intentions
i do wonder if his mom and dad go to bed at night
proud of little whiskey-cokey-georgie poo
his dictatorship?
how does laura lay her head down at night
pulled eyes and all
and dream sweetly of lambies and cashmere sweaters?
when she f**** him
does she call him adolf or castro?

you sweaty little piggish oompa loompa elmer fudd ass
karma is a bitch
and i don't think you'll ever get
that wascaly wabbit
while torturing the fellas at abu gharib

this war is
war for profit
something i am sure
the bible does not favor

weapons of mass destruction:
the current american government.

now come arrest me
you f*ckers.

And the Hollywood left thinks Republicans are the ones with the problems?

Dennis Kucinich is harder on ABC News than he would be on [insert name of your favorite foreign threat here]

August 23, 2007 09:38 AM

They cropped him out of a photo of the Democratic candidates, among other evils.  Dennis is "awaiting an explanation."  His indignant website is hilarious.

Also: Can you believe his campaign slogan is "Strength Through Peace"?

Matt Dole signs up with my former boss...

August 20, 2007 12:06 PM

... Mark Weaver.  Funny how things turn out.  Matt was (until mid-July) one of Ohio's most prominent GOP bloggers.  A few weeks ago, he mysteriously announced he was closing down his blog to pursue other opportunities.  And then last week came the news that he had signed up with Mark Weaver to work at Communications Counsel.

I've been surprised by the attention this has received, such as this post from the prominent left-wing site Buckeye State Blog:

Last week Matt Dole, the prominent Republican blogger which surprised all by scrubbing his blog and going underground, popped back on the radar. Not surprisingly, Dole had been hired into to Ohio Super Republican Consultant Mark Weaver's Communications Counsel. For those out of the loop, Weaver was largely responsible for Betty Montgomery's place in Ohio government, along with countless others in the Ohio statehouse. The position with Weaver is quite a reward for the young Dole.

It will be interesting to see how these two fare together.  Mark has a bloggers' brain--he's a news junkie, he's eccentric, and he works really weird hours--so I'm a little surprised he thinks he even needs help with new media.  But he and Matt should have a good time working on creative ways to get the blogs to drive what the old media is covering.  I just hope they're careful about how they try to "use" the conservative blogs to feed the old media machine.  We're pretty savy.

Monday morning and I'm busy with real work...

...but I do have to take a minute to roll my eyes over this comment, left over at the Beacon:

Of possible interest to local blogwatchers, yesterday Nasty, Brutish and Short ran an item about the Beacon’s cuckold story with the title, “Ridiculous Blind Item of the Day.”

Interestingly, earlier today the above faxed letter to George Vincent was posted as a comment under NBS’s item and appeared briefly on his blog before being deleted. (NBS, if the story’s so ridiculous, why delete a letter to the chair of the local Republican Party?)

In his item, and this is typical for NBS, he pontificates without knowing what he’s talking about. There are several examples in his cuck item which confuses cuckoldry (a fetish behavior) with swinging. Here’s the most obvious example of NBS’s ignorance of the subject:

And what about that “hot wife” clue?  Surely it’s not a physical description?  If so, it certainly narrows the list of potential cuckolds quite dramatically.

If NBS had done minimal Googling, he’d know that “hot wife” doesn’t mean “good looking wife” or “sexy wife” as he assumes. From Wiki:

The term hot wife refers to a married woman who has sex with men other than her spouse, with the husband’s consent. In most cases the husbands take a vicarious pleasure in watching their wives and the other male’s enjoyment, or enjoy watching, hearing, or knowing about their wives’ adventures.

Therefore, NBS, for failing to do mininal research before posting, for writing and posting an ignorant item, and for censoring legitimate comments simply because you disagree with the POV, you must be disciplined without mercy. Your punishment is to get down on all fours, beg, and vote the straight Republican ticket!

Oops, nevermind. You’re already there. I’ll have to think of something else....

Typical.  I suppose I should ignore crap like this, but I do want to point out that I am having major problems with comment spam, as I have mentioned numerous times.*  If a "real" comment gets deleted, it is an accident.  I would have been more than happy to have a copy of the letter to George Vincent (Hamilton County GOP Chairman) left in my comment section.  Because the letter is so asinine!

Also, who knew I'd ever be excoriated regarding the subtle difference between swinging and cuckolding?  Apparently I am an idiot on these matters, and I apologize for misleading my readers.  If you set out to swing this weekend and instead ended up cuckolded, I apologize.  It is all my fault.  You should have known not to rely on me, as I have such ignorance of my subjects!

I do know about the "hot wife" term, though--thanks for the suggestion that I google it.  As was completely obvious from my original post, I was making a joke about the relative unattractiveness of policial wives.

*Comments are turned back on, by the way.  We'll see if my new fix works.

More socialized medicine fun from up in Canada...

August 17, 2007 10:11 AM

.. where there is no neonatal intensive care space available--in the entire country.  From the BBC:

A Canadian woman has given birth to extremely rare identical quadruplets.

The four girls were born at a US hospital because there was no space available at Canadian neonatal intensive care units... Autumn, Brooke, Calissa and Dahlia are in good condition at Benefis Hospital in Great Falls, Montana...

Health officials said they checked every other neonatal intensive care unit in Canada but none had space.

The Jepps, a nurse and a respiratory technician were flown 500km (310 miles) to the Montana hospital, the closest in the US, where the quadruplets were born on Sunday.

In National Review Online, former Canadian Mark Steyn writes:

Well, you can't expect a G7 economy of only 30 million people to be able to offer the same level of neonatal ICU coverage as a town of 50,000 in remote rural Montana. And let's face it, there's nothing an expectant mom likes more than 300 miles in a bumpy twin prop over the Rockies.

And of course this news reminds me of this hysterical entry from a few months back, written by our blogospheric Canadian friend, Dr. Mabuse:

Apologies for being so dilatory in my postings. The truth is, I've been having some more health problems. Last week when I was sick, I think I must have been sicker than I realized. I've almost completely lost my hearing in my right ear. I suspect the sinus congesion ruptured my eardrum.

But fear not, you Americans. I am a beneficiary of Canada's Universal Health Care, so I will be going to see my doctor next Tuesday, to examine a problem that arose last week. In that time, I may even be able to regrow an eardrum, but if I don't, I can be put on the waiting list for one of these:

Ridiculous Blind Item of the Day

August 16, 2007 08:34 AM

Comes from The Cincinnati Beacon, where the Dean announces that a high profile local Republican (who he refuses to name) is into some kinky hanky panky:

[W]ord is that Hamilton County has its own high-profile hypocrite with a taste for unusual extra-curricular activities. Like Vitter, this Republican preaches “traditional family values” and attacks all the usual targets. Like Vitter, he’s used his own family to hype his wholesome image. But in private he’s said to indulge in a decidedly more exotic activity known as “cuckolding.”

He then goes on to explain what cockolding is, inexplicably assuming that his readers are all over the age of 75.  And the clues he gives us about the identify of this person are pretty lean:

A source tells us that Southern Ohio has an active “cuckold” subculture, complete with internet hook-ups. Rumor has it our family values Repub and “hot wife” are known on the scene.

You gotta love the ridiculousness of the phrase "a source tells us that Southern Ohio has an active 'cuckold' subculture."  Did someone finally tell him about the Terrace Park Swingers?  They've got to be a myth, by the way.  I just can't believe that Terrace Park swings.

And what about that "hot wife" clue?  Surely it's not a physical description?  If so, it certainly narrows the list of potential cuckolds quite dramatically.

A link from the technorati glitterati!

August 14, 2007 03:50 PM

Welcome Althouse readers!  So glad to have you, so mortified that I didn't give Dolley Madison her "e."  In my defense, the Dolly Madison bakery doesn't give her an "e," though I suppose I shouldn't have relied on them.  Tant pis!

I guess I should act all mature and professional, and pretend I get links from the likes of Ann Althouse all the time.  Will you stay if I do?  Or do I have to find more first lady cleavage to get you all to stick around?

Does Edith Wilson do anything for you?

White House portrait

Deleting spam comments and listening to

August 13, 2007 08:54 PM

How fun is that for a Monday night?  More so than you might think: This episode of Bloggingheads has supreme legal blogger Ann Althouse talking to Robin Givhan of the Washington Post about Hillary's cleavage, Al Gore's earth tones and Jeri Thompson's being hot and over 40.  Fast forward if you're short on time to their discussion of crocs--they hate them, as do I.  Please, people.  Do not wear crocs.  Up until the croc discussion, though, it's a fascinating commentary about fashion and how people in the political spectrum chose to present themselves.

I completely agree with both of them that these topics are fair game.  This has been an issue since the famous debate between Nixon and Kennedy.  Nixon refused to wear make-up, because he thought it word of it would get out, and it would make him appear unmanly.  Kennedy, of course, wore make-up and looked fantastic (obviously he had other advantages over Nixon in this regard).  After the debate, people who had watched on tv thought Kennedy had won; those who heard it on the radio though Nixon prevailed.

It's a long episode of Bloggingheads, but it's well worth it.  For the record, I thought Hillary wasn't showing too much cleavage.  It's just the thought of Hillary showing any cleavage that I have a problem with.  It's just too weird, too un-Hillary.  It's so much of a departure from what we expect from her that it is disarming.  It is pretty unfortunate that the first major female presidential candidate is so unfeminine.  She could have been feminine while she was first lady.  Then it would have been natural.  Dolly Madison had a decent rack, and now there's a whole line of cookies names after her.  By today's standards, she showed a lot of cleavage.  But Hillary refused to be feminine as first lady, because it just wasn't her.  She wanted to be taken seriously, and thought she needed to look like a man to achieve that.  Now she's the first woman to have a real shot at the presidency, and she can't take advantage of her feminine wiles.  Does she have any?  Or because it's Hillary Clinton, are we just too skeptical about being manipulated? 

With Hillary, you have to ask whether she's wearing something low-cut because of some political calculation.  Is she channeling Eva Peron now?  She used to be channeling Eleanor Roosevelt.  What gives?  Is it just too hard to believe Hillary would do something because it's what she wants to?  With Hillary, do we assume there has to be a reason?  Hillary and her mind games!

Mind games, manipulation.... maybe she is feminine!!

As for the comments I'm deleting, I've noticed that I've gotten a lot of bowflex spam since I started posting about the elliptical machine.  Do the bowflex people think someone's going to buy their machine after reading a post about how I can't even carry my elliptical machine up the stairs?  What's up with that?

And I'm still getting lots of spam comments that advertise Cialis.  Who would buy Cialis off a website called Nasty, Brutish & Short?  That's what I'd like to know. 

How is it responsible journalism to publish the homeowner's addresses for the 10 most expensive homes on the Magic Mountain?

July 27, 2007 08:11 AM

As the Enquirer does this morning.  It's class warfare journalism, and it's unsafe.  I know it's part of the public record, but it doesn't have to be publicized.  Those are two different things.

Remember this from two years ago in Chicago?

Federal judge's family killed

Husband, mother found slain in basement

Jurist had been a target of white supremacist

Well the Enquirer's list includes a federal judge's home address, and she has to deal with the criminal element every single day.  That doesn't need to be in the paper.  Most judges try to keep their home addresses on the dl security reasons. 

And as for the other names on this list, why not just run that under the headline "Kidnappers Look Here"?

Tony Snow on Cancer's Unexpected Blessings

July 26, 2007 01:46 PM

And writing like American leaders used to write, in Christianity Today:

Through such trials, God bids us to choose: Do we believe, or do we not? Will we be bold enough to love, daring enough to serve, humble enough to submit, and strong enough to acknowledge our limitations? Can we surrender our concern in things that don't matter so that we might devote our remaining days to things that do?

When our faith flags, he throws reminders in our way. Think of the prayer warriors in our midst. They change things, and those of us who have been on the receiving end of their petitions and intercessions know it.

It is hard to describe, but there are times when suddenly the hairs on the back of your neck stand up, and you feel a surge of the Spirit. Somehow you just know: Others have chosen, when talking to the Author of all creation, to lift us up—to speak of us!

This is love of a very special order. But so is the ability to sit back and appreciate the wonder of every created thing. The mere thought of death somehow makes every blessing vivid, every happiness more luminous and intense. We may not know how our contest with sickness will end, but we have felt the ineluctable touch of God.

The whole thing is an excellent read.  It's like a nice mix of C.S. Lewis and Peggy Noonan. 

And, how come Tony's day job doesn't keep him from writing?  I can barely get in a handful of blog posts per day, and I'm not the White House Press Secretary.

Airhead TV

We drastically need to change the lead item...

July 23, 2007 09:19 AM

So check out some poorly placed advertising.  Here's one that's pretty tasteless:

But not as tasteless as this:

Hey, it least it's not a post about Hillary's cleavage.  More unfortunately placed advertising here.

And in the Washington Post, they talk about Hillary's heaving bosoms

July 20, 2007 03:15 PM

Pulitzer prize winning columnist Robin Givhan writes:

There was cleavage on display Wednesday afternoon on C-SPAN2. It belonged to Sen. Hillary Clinton.

She was talking on the Senate floor about the burdensome cost of higher education. She was wearing a rose-colored blazer over a black top. The neckline sat low on her chest and had a subtle V-shape. The cleavage registered after only a quick glance. No scrunch-faced scrutiny was necessary. There wasn't an unseemly amount of cleavage showing, but there it was. Undeniable.

And they run a picture:

 The presidential hopeful revealed a changing fashion sense in the Senate.

Now if that isn't enough to get you to turn away from the computer screen for the weekend, I don't know what is.  Go.  Outside.

NBS gets invited on the radio!

July 17, 2007 11:33 AM

How exciting, I've been approached by a local radio station asking me to be on the air.  They want me on to do "ask the expert" segments.  Basically this involves chatting with the hosts about legal issues, and taking calls from listeners.  It sounded like fun, and I was so flattered.  And I was completely confident I could use the opportunity to catapult myself to broadcasting fame and became the next Nancy Grace.  As regular NBS readers know, combining legal skills, a black and white sense of justice, and histrionic behavior is well within my skill set.  No more boring days at the office.  I was on my way!

And then, the station told me that as "the expert" it would be appropriate for me to commit to $6,000 worth of paid advertising.  I was slightly shocked, because I listen to this radio station, and they do NOT tell their listeners that their "experts" pay to be on the air.  But she was quite clear: It was a quid pro quo.

How disillusioning!  And how dumb am I for being so naive about these things?

Update: The BBC misrepresented the Queen's Big Showdown with the Photog

July 13, 2007 08:39 AM

I am trying to follow up on earlier posts, and this one is a good one:

BBC bosses face new questions over why they waited almost 24 hours to apologise for lying about the Queen.

The corporation has admitted it "misrepresented" what happened in an encounter between the Queen and photographer Annie Leibovitz at Buckingham Palace.

The Queen was apparently shown storming out during a photo shoot when in fact she had been walking to the shoot and the footage had been spliced together out of sequence.

There are calls for the responsible official from the BBC to resign.  I think it would be humanizing if her handlers would let her be angry on occasion, and ultimately good for her reputation.

"Less dressy, what do you think this is?"

July 11, 2007 01:15 PM

I am eagerly awaiting the first time this video is linked up on YouTube.  Apparently the Queen went off on celebrity photographer Annie Leibovitz, who had apparently suggested she remove her crown.  Here's a still:

She was not amused by the suggestion, apparently:

TV cameras follow the Queen storming off with an official lifting the large train of her blue velvet cape off the floor as the Queen tells her lady-in-waiting: "I'm not changing anything. I've had enough dressing like this thank you very much."

Sounds highly entertaining.

For those of you who think NBS is too conservative...

July 8, 2007 10:45 PM

... you really need to check out Andrew Cusack's blog.  He's young, extremely intelligent, a great writer, and an American who doesn't even believe in the Declaration of Independence.  Yes, he's a monarchist.  Talk about diversity of opinion!  You don't run into many monarchists these days.

It takes a special kind of person to post on the Fourth of July the following words: "Two hundred and thirty-one years ago today, the tragedy of our people commenced."  He then has a picture of George III alongside a picture of George W. Bush, and says he prefers the former.  Misguided, I know, but a fascinating perspective.

And he has some great things to say about Sewanee.  Check out his feature "Maces of America," a "series of post covering the history, design, and use of ceremonial maces in the United States."  In it, he writes of Sewanee:

The University of the South, which sits on a 10,000-acre domain in Sewanee, Tennesee, is in my opinion the St Andrews of America. To my knowledge it is the only university on this side of the Atlantic which comes close to, and in many regards exceeds, the Universitas Sancti Andrea apud Scotus in the maintenance of tradition.

High praise, my friends.  High praise.  Do check out his blog.  It's so well-written that you may find the comment sections too intimidating.  But go there and lurk.

How much do I love the idea of Cindy Sheehan running against Nancy Pelosi?

Very, very, very much.  From the AP:

Sheehan said she will run against the San Francisco Democrat in 2008 as an independent if Pelosi does not seek by July 23 to impeach Bush. That's when Sheehan and her supporters are to arrive in Washington, D.C., after a 13-day caravan and walking tour starting next week from the group's war protest site near Bush's Crawford ranch.

"Democrats and Americans feel betrayed by the Democratic leadership," Sheehan told The Associated Press. "We hired them to bring an end to the war. I'm not too far from San Francisco, so it wouldn't be too big of a move for me. I would give her a run for her money."

Few people out here realize it, but the locals in San Francisco are not all that wild about Nancy Pelosi.  They think she's too conservative (hard to believe, I know), and that she's sold out her hard left constituency so the Democrats won't look so wacky to people in red state America.   The problem is that Pelosi knows that if the public actually knew how radical she is, the Democrats wouldn't stand a chance.  So Pelosi has to hide it.  And that makes the lefties very mad.  There is no compromising with those people.

So I'm very excited about a big left wing slugfest out in San Fran next year.  Can you imagine all the free media Cindy Sheehan will get in the Bay area if she takes on Pelosi?  She's got the name recognition, and she's clearly nutty enough to seek public office.  So she just might do it.

Run, Cindy, run!

The Episcopal Bishop of Bethlehem is a troll

July 7, 2007 09:23 PM

I'm using internet lingo, of course, which defines "troll" as follows:

Troll.  One who purposely and deliberately (that purpose usually being self-amusement) starts an argument in a manner which attacks others on a forum without in any way listening to the arguments proposed by his or her peers. He will spark of such an argument via the use of ad hominem attacks with no substance or relevance to back them up as well as straw man arguments, which he uses to simply avoid addressing the essence of the issue.

Over at my friend Brad Drell's blog, Paul Marshall has started speaking up in the comments.  He's the Episcopal Bishop of Bethlehem, PA.  Brad's a fellow attorney, was a fraternity brother of mine at Sewanee, and on the conservative side of things in the Episcopal-Anglican crack-up.  Bishop Marshall is not in the same camp. 

So guess what Bishop Marshall is saying in Brad's comments section?  He accuses Brad of being crazy.  He says that there are meds available to cure Brad's condition (conservatism, I guess), and that he hopes Brad's "symptoms are being managed."

And yes, we do know that is THE Bishop of Bethlehem who is posting the comments, not someone doing so under an assumed name.  Can you imagine?  Granted, Bishop Marshall is best known for recently launching an unhinged attack on the Archbishop of Canterbury, accusing him of coddling conservatives (would that were so!) and destroying the church.  So at least Brad's in good company.  He's right there on Bishop Marshall's shit list, along with the The Most Rev. Rowan D. Williams, 104th Archbishop of Canterbury, Primate of All England, and heir to the throne of St. Augustine.  Not bad for a guy from a small town in Louisiana.

But good company aside...  isn't it a little bizarre for a Bishop to be accusing members of the laity of being crazy via blog comments?  It certainly does makes one wonder who is off their meds.  And it doesn't seem to me like it's Brad.

The Brits also write much more interesting obituaries

July 6, 2007 08:38 AM

From the Telegraph:

Count Gottfried von Bismarck, who was found dead on Monday aged 44, was a louche German aristocrat with a multi-faceted history as a pleasure-seeking heroin addict, hell-raising alcoholic, flamboyant waster and a reckless and extravagant host of homosexual orgies.

What a great lede!

The great-great-grandson of Prince Otto, Germany's Iron Chancellor and architect of the modern German state, the young von Bismarck showed early promise as a brilliant scholar, but led an exotic life of gilded aimlessness that attracted the attention of the gossip columns from the moment he arrived in Oxford in 1983 and hosted a dinner at which the severed heads of two pigs were placed at either end of the table.

When not clad in the lederhosen of his homeland, he cultivated an air of sophisticated complexity by appearing in women's clothes, set off by lipstick and fishnet stockings....

Von Bismarck's university career ended in catastrophe in June 1986, when his friend Olivia Channon [daughter of one of Margaret Thatcher's cabinet ministers] was found dead on his bed, the victim of a drink and drugs overdose. Von Bismarck admitted that his role in the affair had brought disgrace on the family name; five years later he told friends that there were still people who would not speak to his parents on account of it, and who told his mother that she had "a rotten son".

Never concealing his homosexuality, von Bismarck continued to appear in public in various eccentric items of attire, including tall hats atop his bald Mekon-like head. At parties he would appear in exotic designer frock coats with matching trousers and emblazoned with enormous logos. Flitting from table to table at fashionable London nightclubs, he was said to be as comfortable among wealthy Eurotrash as he was on formal occasions calling for black tie.

Although described personally as quiet and impeccably mannered, von Bismarck continued to live high on the hog, hosting riotous all-night parties for his (chiefly gay) friends at his £5 million flat off Sloane Square. It was at one such event, in August last year, that von Bismarck encountered tragedy for a second time when one of his male guests fell 60 ft to his death from the roof garden. While von Bismarck was not arrested, he was questioned as a witness and there were those who wondered - not, perhaps, without cause - whether he might be the victim of a family curse...

He never married.

The Enquirer's obituaries could be so much more interesting, couldn't they?  But I'm not sure the West Side could handle it.

I Love the British Press

July 5, 2007 09:59 AM

Here's what they think makes for a good headline:


And they're right!  Talk about a headline that draws the reader in.  So here's what the article says, since I'm sure you're curious:

A HERO cabbie who took on the Glasgow Airport terror suspects told yesterday how he booted one of them in the privates.

Alex McIlveen, 45, kicked the man, whose body was in flames, so hard that he tore a tendon in his foot.

"You were expecting sixty-seven virgins?" he then yelled, whilst kicking him again.  Actually no he didn't, but that would have been the only thing to make this story better. 

Portman falls flat on Willie's Show

June 20, 2007 11:55 AM

Bill Cunningham just spent half an hour interviewing Rob Portman now that Rob's back in town for a while.  Willie kept telling Rob over and over again how out of touch the administration is and Rob was, well, not getting it.  At all.

I know he has to be polite and not trash his former boss the day after he quit, but Rob's going to have to show he understands the party's anger if he's going to get my support for another office.  The last thing Ohio needs is another bland, dispassionate Republican office holder.

Paglia on the Democrats, Gore and Young Hollywood

June 13, 2007 08:21 AM

Camille Paglia is out with another profoundly insightful essay on American culture and politics.  After watching the Democratic debates, she suggests that her party may be in trouble:

Despite numerous polls claiming that registered Democrats like myself are happy with their current field of presidential contenders, the Gore boomlet betrays subterranean tremors of doubt. After two major televised debates by both parties, only a Pollyanna on helium would believe that any of the top-tier Democrats will definitely be able to defeat a leading Republican like Mitt Romney or Rudy Giuliani.

But, she explains, Gore is not the answer:

As a global warming agnostic, I dislike the way that Gore's preachy, apocalyptic fundamentalism has fomented an atmosphere of hysteria around this issue and potentially compromised the long-term credibility of environmentalism. Democrats who long for his return as the anti-Hillary may not realize how Gore has become a risible cartoon character for much of the country at large. Anyone who listens to talk radio has been repeatedly regaled by clips of Gore bizarrely going off the deep end at one speech or another. And Gore, far worse than Hillary, is the Phantom of a Thousand Accents -- telegraphing his supercilious condescension to whatever audience he's trying to manipulate.

And her armchair psyschological quarterbacking of young Hollywood is dead on:

What links the Lohan and Hilton cases is the weird behavior of the parents -- either flaky and dysfunctional or overbearing and coddling. The Lohan and Hilton mothers seem to reject aging by trying to keep their daughters in developmental limbo. Paris in particular seems to have become a psychic prisoner, turned into a flash-frozen marzipan doll by her belligerently benevolent mom. Neither family is typical, of course, but are the Hiltons exposing an unhealthy symbiosis in recent American family life? Adulthood keeps getting postponed for white middle-class girls, who even after they arrive at college are obsessively linked by umbilical cellphones to their hovering parents, who want to shield their progeny from all of life's nicks and scrapes.

Camille Paglia is the only reason Salon is worth reading.

SW Ohioans 4 Fred (Thompson)

June 12, 2007 12:38 PM

I learned over lunch that a friend of mine is behind the website SW Ohioans 4 Fred.  It's the blog "for Fred Heads primarily in Butler, Clermont, Clinton, Hamilton & Warren Counties- the counties that decided the 2004 election."  Great point about how this area decided the 2004 election.  People have already forgotten that. 

As for me, I have not yet decided if I'm 4 Fred.  But I'm sure I'll be reading SW Ohioans 4 Fred as I come to a decision, and you should be too.

What I was not doing this weekend... participating in the World Naked Bike Ride!

June 11, 2007 08:33 AM

Of course, it's a protest against global warming:

The naked cyclists - and others with strategically-placed body paint, sticky tape or bum bags - were highlighting the damage caused by car dependency.

Here I am, 33 years old, and I've never even heard of a bum bag. 

One of the participants explains the larger point of the World Naked Bike Ride:

He said: "We are seeing an increasing number of stories of melting ice caps and Antarctica crumbling away and no government is doing anything serious about this.

"They are paying lip service to the problem so people have been taking to their bikes, unclothing, to express their feelings about it."

Never talk about paying lip service to a problem when you're bike riding naked.

Want pictures?  Of course you do!


That's the World Naked Cyclists in Mexico City.  Hope these Mexicans don't want amnesty here, too!

Here they are in Vancouver:


Awww, too bad it rained!  Good weather in London, though:


A perfect day for a naked bike ride!  And, now everybody believes in global warming!

Previously: "It's spectacular!"

Paris on the phone with Baba Wawa

Paris's mom was on the phone with Barbara Walters when Paris called in from jail.  And Paris ends up on the phone with Barbara Walters.  That doesn't sound like a p.r. stunt at all!

Paris tells Baba:

I used to act dumb," she told Walters in the exclusive phone conversation. "That act is no longer cute.  Now, I would like to make a difference. ... God has given me this new chance."

Get that?  "God has given me a new chance."  I'm with Ann Althouse:

"I just hope this making a difference business doesn't involve adopting children or letting us know what's wrong with the government."

But chances of that are pretty good, aren't they?  Are we ready for Paris as the moral arbiter?

Hard to believe ANYONE could find this offensive... Shirley Q. Liquor on the Twelve Days of Kwanzaa

June 7, 2007 11:37 PM

Voinvovich Flips on Immigration?

Is it a flip, or is it a flop?  So yesterday Senator Voinvoich voted against killing the bill.  But today, he's voted to limit the "guest worker program" to 5 years--which is being construed as a vote to kill the bill.

The latest roll is is here.  If the Senator would just say whether he supports the bill or not, this would be a lot easier.  Surely a plain statement that that summarizes his position is the least he owes his constituents?

UPDATE:  Sean Hannity is on Laura Ingraham's show, and they are both pleased as punch with this morning's developments.  Is this Harriet Miers II?

Good Times: Jerry Springer's "I paid her with a check" spot from the 1980 campaign

June 5, 2007 09:21 AM

Jerry Springer for Governor - kewego
Jerry Springer for Governor - kewego
Jerry Springer for Governor - kewego
In this campaign ad from 1980, Jerry Springer admitted he has slept with a hooker and paid her by check.
HT: Llama Butchers

Tabloid Love

How does this happen?  JonBenet Ramsey's dad and Natalie Holloway's mom are dating.

Ask, and ye shall receive... from Laura Ingraham

June 1, 2007 10:11 AM

On last Friday's drive up to Michigan, I caught Laura Ingraham's radio show.  She was taking calls from veterans and military families, and I was so moved by this call from Barb in Annapolis, Maryland.  Her son reenlisted with the Marines on Friday.  I emailed Laura and asked for the clip.  Give it a listen.

Download file

I just think she's awesome.

Crazy. C-R-A-Z-Y. Crazy.

So last night was the big finals of the national Spelling Bee.  And it drew protesters:

Yes, they're serious.  They're from the Simplified Spelling Society!  They explain their aims thusly:

One of the picketers, ALC chair and SSS member, Alan Mole, from Boulder, Colorado, puts it this way: "Our odd spelling retains words like cough, bough, through and though. This increases illiteracy and crime. Fix it and you fix a host of problems. We want to fix it."

Get that folks?  It's the spelling that increases illiteracy and crime.  Spelling must be stopped!

Susan Jacoby thinks Memorial Day is Disgusting

May 31, 2007 03:44 PM

This is how she answers the question "How do you keep your faith during times of war?" in the Washington Post-Newsweek blog "On Faith."  At first, she says that she doesn't want to answer the question, because she rejects the premise.  And then:

The reason I changed my mind and decided to comment, however, has nothing to do with the unanswerable theodicy question and everything to do with my disgust at the annual American celebration of a melding of patriotism and religion so often used to justify war. I was at home working on Memorial Day and wanted to take a break to watch a movie on television. Fat chance. Nonstop movies glorifying war were the only movies being shown. Iwo Jima. Custer's last stand. The Civil War, including the "glorious" lost southern cause as well as the cause of ending slavery. Alvin York overcoming his pacifism. General George Patton, as certifiable a military lunatic as America has ever produced, quoting scripture and slapping a soldier with what would today be called post-traumatic stress disorder.

The endless references in these movies to the Bible, and to God keeping watch over soldiers, are as nauseating as the endless television news stories about the "miracle" of a slain U.S. soldier's family finding an Iraqi puppy who was, apparently, the last creature the doomed young soldier had a chance to cuddle.

And Newsweek and the Wa-Po think this kind of commentary constitutes "intelligent, informed, eclectic, respectful conversation" about religion?  It's none of those things, not when one of your panelists thinks Memorial Day is disgusting, and Biblical references are "nauseating."

HT: Amy Alkon, who thinks Susan Jacoby is marvelous.

If you're going to be an anonymous blogger, don't blog about the malpractice case pending against you

From the Boston Globe:

It was a Perry Mason moment updated for the Internet age.

As Ivy League-educated pediatrician Robert P. Lindeman sat on the stand in Suffolk Superior Court this month, defending himself in a malpractice suit involving the death of a 12-year-old patient, the opposing counsel startled him with a question.

Was Lindeman Flea?

Flea, jurors in the case didn't know, was the screen name for a blogger who had written often and at length about a trial remarkably similar to the one that was going on in the courtroom that day.

In his blog, Flea had ridiculed the plaintiff's case and the plaintiff's lawyer. He had revealed the defense strategy. He had accused members of the jury of dozing.

With the jury looking on in puzzlement, Lindeman admitted that he was, in fact, Flea.

His poor defense counsel, I am sure they had no idea what they'd been hit with.

The "Flea" confession was probably lost on the jury, but Plaintiff's counsel indicated that they would be introducing all of his blog posts as evidence the next day.  He coughed up a substantial settlement offer before that happened.  And lo and behold, the dispute was resolved. 

Kudos to Plaintiff's counsel, who will be telling this war story for the rest of her career.  Oh and the best part?  Check out what the Doctor had been saying about her:

Elizabeth N. Mulvey, the lawyer who represented Vinroy and Deborah Binns and unmasked Lindeman as Flea, said she laughed when she read a posting at the start of the trial in which Lindeman nicknamed her Carissa Lunt, noticed that she bit her fingernails and mused, "Wonder if she's a pillow biter, too?"

The jury would NOT have found that commentary impressive.  And I wonder when Plaintiff's counsel realized that the doctor was "Flea"?  Did she know it all along, and wait for just the right moment?  I picture her as a lioness, stalking her prey.  And waiting... for just the right moment... to pounce!

HT: Althouse

Terrorist "Dry Runs" on U.S. Commercial Flights

May 30, 2007 10:45 AM

From Ann Jacobsen's blog, Aviation Nation:

The Department of Homeland Security has declassified the Inspector General's report on Northwest Flight 327 — a flight which I was a passenger on back in June of 2004. It took the US government two years and eleven months to confirm what I have been writing since the flight landed — in my 28-part series for and in Terror in The Skies, Why 9/11 Could Happen Again (Spence 2005) i.e:

  • The flight was a dry run for a future terrorist attack involving planes.   
  • The Federal Air Marshal Service grossly mishandled what happened during the flight.   
  • The Syrians terrified flight crew and passengers.   
  • The Federal Air Marshal Service grossly mismanaged what happened after the flight landed in Los Angeles.
  • The Federal Air Marshal Service attempted to cover up their egregious incompetence by issuing false statements and misleading the public about the severity of what happened on the flight....

Ironic note: DHS now refers to the group as a "band" (in quotes) because the Syrians were not a band — that was their cover. The declassified DHS report also confirms what I reported last month: that the Syrians from Flight 327 were involved in an earlier dry run — on January 28, 2004. The FBI had flagged this dry run into their incident base six months before Northwest 327 took flight. 

I wrote about Flight 327 back in August, and was immediately accused of perpetuating an urban legend, and inadequate sourcing.  Of course, it turns out I was right all along.  This is no where near the abuse that has been heaped on Ann Jacobsen though, for pursuing this story.

You can read Ann's first-hand account of what happened during Flight 327, here.  It is pretty chilling.

HT: Malkin

There was no Kent State conspiracy or cover up. I'm telling you, I know.

May 23, 2007 10:01 PM

But first, a little context:

The Cincinnati Beacon is up with a post on the Kent State shootings, which happened 37 years ago, in a time of angst and uncertainty about a foreign war.  And when a good many people became extremely exercised about the motives of people in power, and were inclined to believe the worst. 

The Beacon links to an article by Bob Fitrakis (a former Green Party candidate for Ohio Gov.) and Harvey Wasserman (a very well known left-wing academic and commentator).  Their article contends that there is "new proof" that shows the Ohio National Guard intentionally opened fire on the students at Kent State, killing four of them.  They write:

For 37 years the official cover story has been that a mysterious shot rang out and the young Guardsmen panicked, firing directly into the “mob” of students.

This week, that cover story was definitively proven to be a lie.

Prior to the shooting, a student named Terry Strubbe put a microphone at the window of his dorm, which overlooked the rally. According to the Associated Press, the 20-second tape is filled with “screaming anti-war protectors followed by the sound of gunfire.”

But in an amplified version of the tape, a Guard officer is also heard shouting “Right here! Get Set! Point! Fire!”

The sound of gunshots follow the word “Point.” Four students soon lay dead.

The article contends that this tape was recently discovered, and that it proves what conspiracy theorists had long suspected--that the Government killed these students.  In fact, Fitrakis and Wasserman go so far as to directly accuse then-Governor Rhodes of ordering the National Guard to open fire.  They call it a "premeditated and unprovoked order" to fire live ammunition at the students, and that it came from the Governor:

For we now know that a premeditated, unprovoked order was indeed given to National Guardsmen to fire live ammunition at peaceful, unarmed American students, killing four of them. The illegal order to arm the Guard with live ammunition in the first place could only have come from the governor of Ohio.

It is a scathing claim.  They are accusing Governor Rhodes and the Ohio National Guardsmen of murder.  It is a claim that is not worthy of two people who are, though to the left, well-within the confines of customary Ohio political discourse.

And they are wrong.  How do I know this?  Seven years ago was the 30th anniversary of the Kent State shootings.  At that time, I was a newly-minted law school grad, and was working for the government.  And I was given an extraordinary assignment: review the Kent State files, and determine what the media could and could not see in response to FOIA and Ohio Public Records Act requests (they were writing their thirtieth anniversary retrospectives).*  And I got to see everything, and determine what the press and the public would be allowed to see.  There were boxes and boxes of materials--including all the records pertaining to the numerous investigations after the shootings.  The records were so voluminous, it took weeks to review all of them.  It was a brutal assignment--there are photos from the scene that day which are so graphic and disturbing that the press will not publish them.  And, I quickly became an expert in all things related to Kent State.

I cannot comment on the contents of the non-public records, but I can say that very, very few fall in the non-public category, and the press got to see every thing pertinent.  And the important thing is this:  There is absolutely no evidence to support Fitrakis's and Wasserman's outrageous claims.  None.  All of the evidence supports the conclusions of the official investigations from thirty-seven years ago.  There was no conspiracy, and neither the Ohio National Guard, nor Governor Rhodes, murdered anyone.  It is disgraceful that Fitrakis and Wasserman would level the allegations that they have.  There is no evidence to back up their claims of intentional and premeditated murder.  None.

*If you're wondering why all the records are not available to the press or the public, the reason is that law enforcement investigatory records--especially those pertaining to uncharged suspects--cannot be produced under FOIA or the Ohio Public Records Act.

Finally, Elizabeth Hasselbeck Fights Back

The Times of London Profiles Dennis Kucinich's Hippie Freak of a Wife

May 21, 2007 03:28 PM

She is 29 and he is 60, by the way.  Third marriage for him, first for her.  Check out their hot hippie freak rush to the altar:

Kucinich met her husband-to-be two years ago when she visited his office in the House of Representatives with her boss as a volunteer worker for the American Monetary Institute, an offbeat group dedicated to reforming the “unjust monetary system”.

Offbeat indeed!  From their website, one learns that "the actual history of government control over money shows a far superior record to private control."  In other words, socialize everything!

So she's pretty much perfect for Dennis, and he recognized this, too. 

It was love at first sight for both of them. Immediately after their meeting, Dennis Kucinich phoned a friend and said: “I’ve met her [my future wife].”

Creepy!  Nevertheless,

He was mesmerised to receive a business e-mail from Harper with her usual signature line from Kama Sutra, one of her favourite films: “Knowing love, I shall allow all things to come and go, to be as supple as the wind and take everything that comes with great courage. My heart is as open as the sky.”

That's how she signs a business email?.  Wonder how Dennis signs his?  But anyway:

He proposed at their second meeting in Albuquerque, New Mexico, and they married three months later. The Hollywood actress Shirley MacLaine attended their wedding.

Proposal on a second date?  Tacky and foolish.  Married three months later?  Tacky and foolish.  Shirley MacLaine at the wedding?  Tacky, foolish and totally unsurprising.

On his presidential prospects, the new missuz says:

“Can you imagine what it would be like to have real love in the White House and a true union between the masculine and the feminine?”

Ooooo, sounds like sequel to The DaVinci Code.  Like those characters, she is well-traveled:

It was in India that she encountered somebody with a tongue stud and later had her own implanted — a bar with two delicate balls on either side.

Flash ahead to the "Decline and Fall of the American Empire" history books of tomorrow:  With a flick of the tongue, she said to the Foreign Minister "I can prowmiss you don't have to worry about American intervention in your war of agression.  I have Dennis's foreign pwolicy firmly in cheek."

After all, she's even opposed to aggressive responses to 9-11:

At Kent she unexpectedly signed up for a master’s degree in conflict resolution after meeting the course lecturer in a pub. She knew she had chosen the right subject when her final exam took place on September 11, 2001.

“The rest of the world was sending out its love to America but US officials just wanted to kick out. I remember thinking then I’d love to come to America and help them to reconcile with the rest of the world,” she said.

Perhaps she's just part of some secret Democratic plan to make us all less scared about Hillary?

Apparently, yes:

On her MySpace website she ... says her heroes are “my beautiful husband and anyone else who embraces peace”. She describes Dennis as a “very philosophical, deep thinking person” rather than a new age type, but he is a vegan, unlike her — she still cannot resist occasional dairy products.

Which is why she is now 7 feet tall. -------------->

Draped in the Mexican flag again ... - Wonkette

Photo via Wonkette

Pete Rose's Persecutor's Secretary is a Hooker! Allegedly!

May 18, 2007 02:51 PM

Remember John Dowd, the D.C. attorney, investigator, and author of the Dowd Report--which secured Pete Rose's lifetime ban from baseball?

Well, he's back in the news.  It turns out that the alleged D.C. madam who has been in the news of late had an "employee" who worked as Dowd's secretary at Akin Gump, the prestigious D.C. law firm.

Will he forgive her if she admits it and apologizes?  And which does he think is worse... hooking or betting on baseball?

Local WASP's battle with Anne Heche is getting ugly... reports:

In court papers earlier this month in Los Angeles County Superior Court, Coley Laffoon is asking a judge for joint custody of the couple's 5-year-old son Homer, but claims that Anne's "bizarre and delusional behavior" and "poor parenting skills" could be a problem. In the papers, Laffoon claims that Anne once didn't put Homer in a car seat, she often cusses in front of the child, and packed school lunches that Homer "did not like." Laffoon added that his prior experience as a nanny and a summer camp counselor justify giving him joint custody.

I don't know why he's focused on the car seat and un-tastey lunches when he's in a custody battle with someone who wrote an autobiography called "Call Me Crazy."  That book pretty much documents her mental instability, including her battles with her alter ego, "Celestia" and her attempted rendez-vous in the desert with a space ship. Word on the street here has always been that Coley's parents were mortified that he married the deranged ex-girlfiend of one of the world's most prominent lesbians.  But, I've also been told Anne always behaved herself and was perfectly nice while in town for family functions.

But anyway, back to TMZ.  They say a rep for Heche has fired back:

It is disappointing that Coley Laffoon has resorted to filing lies with the court because Anne would not cave in to his astronomical monetary demands, including his demand for $45,000 a month in support. For the past several years, the child's father has refused to get a job in order to contribute financially to the child's care.

Ouch.  No job, Coley?

Meanwhile, over at The Kraalspace...

May 17, 2007 08:59 AM

...Dr. Mabuse has a post up that is as amusing as it is mortifying.  Here's a correction that her local paper ran yesterday:

A photograph on page D1 of yesterday's Citizen is not of Peter John Graham, who was convicted Tuesday of sexually assaulting a 13-year-old girl. The photograph is of Peter Reid Graham, who has never been charged with, or convicted of, any sexual assault. The Citizen apologizes unreservedly to Peter Reid Graham and his family for any distress caused by the erroneous publication of his photograph.

Can you imagine???  But it gets worse.  Per Dr. Mabuse:

But the online edition doesn't show you what the print edition has: under an apology for printing Mr. Graham's photograph, they thoughtfully print his photograph! So the Citizen has now TWICE published the photo of the man who DIDN'T do the crime, and we have not yet seen ONE photo of the man who DID.

I wish I were licensed to practice law in Canada.  That would be one fun lawsuit to file.

Is the Business Courier Just a Gossip Rag for People in Suits?

May 16, 2007 09:31 AM

If not, then why are they running this:

Top P&G executive files for divorce

A.G. Lafley, the CEO of Procter & Gamble since 2000 and the mastermind behind its massive acquisition of Gillette Co., has filed for divorce after almost 37 years.

The Procter lifetimer, who will turn 60 on June 13, filed for a legal separation from his wife, Margaret, in Hamilton County Common Pleas Court on Dec. 29. According to the filing, he and his wife agree that their marital relationship has become incompatible and that they have been living separate and apart. A.G. Lafley's address is listed as 1 Lytle Place, downtown. Margaret Lafley's address is listed as Hyde Park....

Q: What kind of fan could be won over by an XXL jockstrap?

May 14, 2007 10:50 PM

A:  A Dodger's fan.  From the Enquirer:

A talkative Dodgers fan received a one-of-a-kind souvenir from Ken Griffey Jr. during Friday’s game at Dodger Stadium.

A ball? A wristband? An autographed bat?

No, the Reds outfielder tossed the unidentified man, who was seated beside the Reds dugout and had heckled Griffey throughout the game, a new XXL athletic supporter.

Can’t a guy be fan-friendly?” Griffey wondered Monday.

The fan documented the whole encounter with the future Hall of Famer on his MySpace page, complete with photos lending credence to supporting the story.

And, this gesture won the fan over.  Annoyingly, the Enquirer doesn't mention the fan's name, or link to his MySpace page.  The Enquirer has got to revise it's policy about linking to websites.  I'm tired of this "let's pretend the internet doesn't exist" crap.  Especially since blogs are driving their readership.

And what is with The Times' Other Latest Obsession?

May 8, 2007 03:33 PM

And no, I don't mean preppies.  I mean animals and their love lives.  On April 30, it was the ducks:

Dr. Brennan was oblivious to bird phalluses until 1999.  While working in a Costa Rican forest, she observed a pair of birds called tinamous mating. “They became unattached, and I saw this huge thing hanging off of him,” she said. “I could not believe it. It became one of those questions I wrote down: why do these males have this huge phallus?” ...

Gazing at the enormous organs, she asked herself a question that apparently no one had asked before.  “So what does the female look like?” she said. “Obviously you can’t have something like that without some place to put it in. You need a garage to park the car.”

And then on May 3 it was the frogs:

Then Mr. Noonan said in a low voice, “Hey, come look at this.”

The glare of his flashlight showed a male frog locked onto the back of a female twice his size.

“They’re in amplexus,” Mr. Barker said, using the polite biological term, and the Latin word, for embrace.

Some embrace. It’s more like a lock hold. The male atop the female grasps her with his forelegs and hangs on for dear life as he fertilizes the eggs she releases into the water, all the while fending off other males trying to depose him.

“Look at them!” Mr. Barker said as we watched four or five desperate males fling themselves onto the mating pair, only to get a quick kick in the gut or go somersaulting over the female’s head.

And today it's the last giant tortoise in the Galapagos:

A few years later, in 1993, there was briefly a companion known as “Lonesome George’s girlfriend,” but she was not a tortoise. She was a 26-year-old graduate student in zoology from Switzerland named Sveva Grigioni.

By coating her hands in the genital secretions of female tortoises and gently stroking him, she managed to demonstrate a couple of times (in the course of several months’ work) that George was capable of an erection. But whereas her touch could induce other male tortoises to reach orgasm within a few minutes, with George she never managed to collect any sperm.

What the hell?  And where is this editorial trend heading next?

HT: Gawker

In Bob Novak's latest column...

May 3, 2007 03:08 PM

...there are two things of interest.  First, the column speculates that "September Dawn" a movie about Mormons opening this weekend is damaging to Mitt Romney's presidential prospects.  The movie details the Mountain Meadows Massacre, and portrays Brigham Young as a 19th century Osama bin Laden.  In the September 11, 1857 massacre,

Mormons mobilized Paiute Indians, accompanied by Mormons disguised as Indians, to attack a peaceful wagon train. The settlers beat off the attack but were left short of food and ammunition. They disarmed themselves at the request of Mormons who said they would lead them to safety but instead turned on the settlers, murdering every man, woman and child above the age of 8. All that is in doubt historically is whether this was ordered by Brigham Young, president of the Mormon Church. ''September Dawn'' says he was responsible, and the church denies it.

I was having a conversation last night about the PBS special that has been running this week on the Mormons, and everyone was in universal agreement that Mormons represent their faith very well.  Nice.  Clean-cut.  Peaceful.  Needless to say, it sounds like "September Dawn" reaches a different conclusion.  And I am sure it won't be helpful to Mitt Romney, who is surely the reason we've been hearing so much about Mormon's lately (which all started with Andrew Sullivan's post about Mormon underwear).

Which brings me to the second thing of interest.  Novak writes:

I attended a screening of the movie hosted by Academy Award-winner Jon Voight (who plays a fictional Mormon bishop). A conservative, he said this was no hit against Romney. ''I didn't even know he was running when we began this,'' Voight told viewers after the screening. But he said this terrible story is important considering America's war against terrorists.

Jon Voight is a "conservative"?  Angelina Jolie's dad?  No wonder they're not talking.

The New York Times Co. is Mad at Bloggers

April 18, 2007 01:59 PM

...for eating away at their profits.  From The NYT Co.'s annual report:

The proliferation of nontraditional media, largely available at no cost, challenges the traditional media model, in which quality journalism has primarily been supported by print advertising revenues. If consumers fail to differentiate our content from other content providers, on the Internet or otherwise, we may experience a decline in revenues.

Awwwww.  How sad for them.  People are turning away from their product because they like "other content providers" better.  And by "other content providers," they mean blogs.

The national conversation about race we've had this week sure has been healthy and productive

April 13, 2007 02:22 PM

The always interesting Camille Paglia...

April 11, 2007 09:05 AM

... talking a great deal of sense about global warming.

As a native of upstate New York, whose dramatic landscape was carved by the receding North American glacier 10,000 years ago, I have been contemplating the principle of climate change since I was a child. Niagara Falls, as well as the even bigger dry escarpment of Clark Reservation near Syracuse, is a memento left by the glacier. So is nearby Green Lakes State Park, with its mysteriously deep glacial pools. When I was 10, I lived with my family at the foot of a drumlin -- a long, undulating hill of murrain formed by eddies of the ancient glacier melt....

Climate change, keyed to solar cycles, is built into Earth's system. Cooling and warming will go on forever. Slowly rising sea levels will at some point doubtless flood lower Manhattan and seaside houses everywhere from Cape Cod to Florida -- as happened to Native American encampments on those very shores. Human habitation is always fragile and provisional. People will migrate for the hills, as they have always done.

Who is impious enough to believe that Earth's contours are permanent? Our eyes are simply too slow to see the shift of tectonic plates that has raised the Himalayas and is dangling Los Angeles over an unstable fault. I began "Sexual Personae" (parodying the New Testament): "In the beginning was nature." And nature will survive us all. Man is too weak to permanently affect nature, which includes infinitely more than this tiny globe.

She's right, of course. 

Episcopal Diocese of Southern Ohio Implicated in Controversal AIDS Research Program

April 6, 2007 08:52 AM

Well!  Here's something to chew on this Good Friday morning.  The Cincinnati Beacon, which is itself a somewhat controversal publication here in Cincinnati, has published a story implicating the Episcopal Diocese of Southern Ohio in an extraordinarily controversal AIDS treatment program in Africa.

I do not have time this morning to get in to all the details, but the gist is this.  Non-locals may not realize this, but in recent years, Cincinnati medical hero Dr. Henry Heimlich has turned his attention away from rescuing chocking victims, and has instead focused on curing AIDs.  As I understand it, his research has not passed bio-ethical muster here in the U.S., so he's had to turn to sources overseas.  In layman's terms, his medical theory is this: AIDs can be cured by "frying" the virus at extremely high temperatures.  The malaria causes the immune system to go into overdrive, and attack not just the malaria, but HIV.  To achieve these temperatures, Dr. Heimlich introduces malaria to Third World AIDs victims, and allows their body temperature to soar to extraordinarly high levels.  The results are not pretty.

The World Health Organization has described this research as a modern medical monstrosity.  The FDA and the CDC are strongly opposed to it.  I, frankly, think it could be worth it if an AIDs cure can be found.  But it is hard not to have extremely serious reservations about performing this kind of medical research on humans.

Apparently, our late Bishop, Herbert Thompson, did not share those reservations.  It appears he was actively involved in soliciting patients for Heimlich Institute malariotherapy research.  Those patients came from Anglican parishes in Africa.

Flashback: How a Real Leader Starts a Ballgame

April 3, 2007 04:29 PM

I have come to hate Movable Type...

March 19, 2007 10:05 PM

...but love Jackie Danicki.

So the past two weeks here at NBS has been a nonstop fiasco with the comments section.  I continue to get several thousand spam comment posts per day, and if they pile up, the whole site grinds to a halt, and I can only delete one of them at a time.  I spent hours over the weekend trying to get them all deleted.  It was a nightmare.

And then tonight, I had a great post drafted and Movable Type lost the whole thing.  So damn frustrating.  Now you may never hear how thrilled I am to have discovered Jackie Danicki's blog, and that someone of her caliber has decided to relocate to Cincinnati.  It says such great things about our City, and I can't say enough great things about her blog and her writing ability.  She used to write for Television Without Pity!  She knows Cathy Seipp!  She hysterically describes Al Gore's new book "An Assault on Reason" as akin to Paris Hilton writing a book called "An Assault on Modesty"!

But those passing praises will have to suffice for now.  Go check her out for yourself.  And thanks for profiling her, Joe.

And if anyone reading this has contemplated starting a blog, stay away from Movable Type. 

How men and women read the web

March 15, 2007 08:28 AM

There's a fascinating article in the Online Journalism Review about an "eyetracking" study of how different people "see" online information... and it turns out that men are fascinated by naughty bits:

When photos do contain people related to the task at hand, or the content users are exploring, they do get fixations. However, gender makes a distinct difference on what parts of the photo are stared at the longest. Take a look at the hotspot below.

Although both men and women look at the image of George Brett when directed to find out information about his sport and position, men tend to focus on private anatomy as well as the face. For the women, the face is the only place they viewed.


This doesn't just occur with images of people:

Coyne adds that this difference doesn’t just occur with images of people. Men tend to fixate more on areas of private anatomy on animals as well, as evidenced when users were directed to browse the American Kennel Club site.

I don't know what conclusion we are supposed to draw from this, but it can't be good.

Advice to lawyers appearing before the U.S. Supreme Court...

March 7, 2007 10:03 AM

...take a deep breath, and pretend they're not wearing any shoes.  They actually might not be! 

The New York Times has this explanation for why Justice Ginsberg was slow to her feet after oral arguments last week:

According to her chambers, Justice Ginsburg had kicked off her shoes during the argument and could not find one of them.

Now that would be embarrassing.  You'd think her chambers could come up with a better "explanation" than she couldn't find her shoe.

"I aestheticized the sleaze right out of it."

January 22, 2007 08:56 AM

So says the Director of "Zoo," a documentary that premiered at the Sundance Film Festival over the weekend.  The film critic for the L.A. Times describes it as "remarkable" and "an elegant, eerily lyrical film."  It's about people who have sex with animals.

The Director is miffed that some people don't appreciate his topic.

"A lot of people looked at me as if I was an exploitative person, dredging up something for profit, and that bothered me. I was certainly asked many times, often with a wrinkled brow, 'Why are you making this film?' It was something I did resent; I thought artists had the opportunity to explore anything."

Apparently, being an artist also means you get to do whatever you want, and not be accountable for your actions.

What to do about a blogging video store clerk?

January 14, 2007 10:03 PM

Because one in the D.C. area blogged about Tucker Carlson coming in to rent a movie:

Tucker Carlson opened an account last night at my video store. I thought the name seemed familiar but I couldn't figure out why. It was after he left that I realized he was on the list of Gigantic Cobagz [ed.  this is, apparently, a slang term for colostomy bag.  Who knew?] I could tell you what he and his ridiculously wasped-out female companion (wife?) rented if you really want to know. I won't tell you where he lives, though. That would be wrong and stupid...

Fast-forward to a week later, when Tucker was apparently googling himself (sounds dirty, doesn't it?), and discovered the post.  He was not pleased, and went back to the store for a tete-a-tete with the clerk.  And to make a long story short, the blogging clerk has now been fired.  And he wants us to feel sorry for him.  Tucker claims he didn't want the guy to get fired, he just wanted the post to be taken down.

So who's the victim, Tucker Carlson, or the video store clerk?  We're tempted to side with Tucker, and not the video store clerk for two reasons.  One, the clerk apparently thinks "ridiculously wasped-out female companion" is some sort of a slur.  In our mind, "wasped-out female companion" equals H-O-T.  And two, the name of the 28 year-old video clerk's blog is "Freelance Genius."  In all likelihood, he has a college degree he is not using it.  He's also got a chip on his shoulder about conservatives.  And he hates the wasp patriarchy.  So he's not, in fact, a genius, much less a freelance one.  He's just a loser giving out his opinions on the internet, and wondering why he has yet to be discovered.  "Pluck me from my video store obscurity," he says.  "I am a freelance genius!

So yeah.  Chalk us up on Tucker's side.

New Years' Resolutions at NBS

January 1, 2007 01:15 PM

1.  Post more often.

2.  Say what I really think about liberals.  They're even worse than you think!

3.  Start using those "category" flags you see at left.

4.  Figure out why YouTube videos make my formatting go whopertyjog.

5.  Figure out how to update my sidebar.

6.  Figure out how to get National Review Online to link to me.

7.  Figure out if the partners at the firm know what a blog is, and ascertain if I would be fired if they found out I have one.

Up and down, man-from-Atlantisly

December 28, 2006 02:35 PM

Literary Review, an esteemed publication, is out with their annual awards.  For Bad Sex in Otherwise Good Fiction.  You can read excerpts from the finalists here.  Go on.  You know you want to.

This is from one of the finalists, David Mitchell, and his novel Black Swan Green:

If Dawn Madden's breasts were a pair of Danishes, Debby Crombie's got two Space Hoppers. Each armed with a gribbly nipple. Tom Yew kissed them in turn and his saliva glistened in the April sun. I know watching was wrong but I couldn't not. Tom Yew slipped off her red panties and stroked the cressy hair there.
'If you want me to stop, Madam Crombie, you have to say now.'
'Oooh, Master Yew,' she croodled, 'don't you dare.'
Tom Yew got on her and sort of jiggled there and she gasped like he was giving her a Chinese burn and wrapped her legs round him, froggily. Now he moved up and down, Man-from-Atlantisly. His silver chain jiggled on his neck.
Now her grubby soles met like they were praying.
Now his skin was glazed in roast pork sweat.
Now she made a noise like a tortured Moomintroll.
Now Tom Yew's body jerkjerked judderily jackknifed and a noise like a ripping cable tore out of him. Once more, like he'd been booted in the balls.
Her fingernails'd sunk salmony welts into his arse.
Debby Crombie's mouth made a perfect O.

Perfect O?  It should be oh no!  What was the author thinking?  And where were his editors?

Kimball Perry, NBS is Embarrassed for You

August 10, 2006 08:08 PM

Oh.  My.  God.  Please tell me the Enquirer did not just publish this.  It is Kimball Perry's article on today's thwarted terrorist attacks!!!  And it has a Tri-State Connection!!!

A Northern Kentucky mother and daughter expecting to enjoy a 10-day cruise around Great Britain instead landed at London’s Heathrow Airport today amid a terrorist scare.

“We have been through hell,” said Audrea Landrum, 67, of Independence, said from England this morning.

Hell?  We thought the terrrorist attacks were thwarted, and everyone was just subjected to massive inconvenience.  As opposed to, you know, the hell of being blown up. 

“It was scary because we didn’t know what was going on,” Landrum said.

We're guessing this is not the first time Landrum has been through hell.  Or "not known what was going on."  Nevertheless,

Landrum, normally nervous and a worrier, brushed off questions about her fear.

“Ain’t no sense being scared. We’ve got to go home somehow,” she said as she sat on the balcony of the cruise ship after just arriving from Heathrow.

“I was so tired, I really didn’t care at that point.”

Perry also said she wasn’t that worried – at first.

“It really wasn’t that bad because we didn’t know what was going on. When I found out, I was like, Oh my god,” Perry said.

Most vexing to Perry was the inconvenience.

“We’ve had the same clothes on for two days and we haven’t brushed our teeth,” she said.

Most "vexing" was the inconvenience?  Are you kidding?  Inconvenience is "vexing"?

And what's with the phrase "Landrum, normally nervous and a worrier"?  Who decribes someone like that?  In a newspaper story!

And then we got to the end.  Right after we hear all about how the daughter had a brush with fame (she saw actor Christian Slater!  And, like, was totally taller than him!), we get this disclaimer from the Enquirer:

(The subjects of this story are the mother and sister of reporter Kimball Perry)

And in tomorrow's edition, folks: Family vacation photos.  Hard hitting snapshots of a local family in pain.

"So glad the NYT got my letter..."

July 18, 2006 11:03 AM

When we say that we think Ann Coulter is a bitch, we say that not with derision.  But with admiration.  Check out the email that she sent to the folks over at Memo Pad.  They had written her to ask for response to these comments by a New York Times staffer on last week's corn starch/fake anthrax attack at the NYT: 

"This thing makes all of Ann Coulter's comments a little less funny," said the [staffer]. "I wonder if she considers herself at all responsible when lunatics read her columns and she says that we should be killed."

Ann's emailed response?

"So glad to hear that The New York Times got my letter and that your friend at the Times thinks I'm funny," she wrote back. "Good luck in journalism and please send me your home address so we can stay in touch, too.

"P.S. If we get hit again, don't forget to ask the NYT if they consider themselves responsible since they have repeatedly exposed classified government programs designed to prevent another terrorist attack."

Family Dog Saves Toddler Playing on Roof

We'd like to see a cat do this.

AP Staff Writers: Not Very Bright

Can you find the error in this article in this morning's Enquirer, which comes to us via the Associated Press?  It is about renovations to the library at Ohio State.

For at least the next three years, English majors wanting to read an original "Don Quixote de la Mancha" by Miguel de Cervantes will have to drive to the warehouse, where books are retrieved from towering shelves.

NBS is not a bad writer. Again!

July 12, 2006 03:53 PM

The results of this year's Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest have been announced.  As always, we tuned in for the results, which, like a pocked pre-teen tuning in for the finale of "American Idol," (after having himself been unceremoniously dismissed from the contest, not by the judges, or by the vote of his fellow Americans, but by the show's producers, in the "you're not even good enough for people to laugh derisively at you" phase of the contest), NBS regards with a combination of jealously and joie de vivre.

In case you hadn't guessed--and are still with us--the Bulwer-Lytton Awards are the Oscars of bad writing.  They are awarded annually in honor of Edward George Bulwer-Lytton, the Victorian writer who famously coined the phrase "It was a dark and stormy night..."

But anyway, on to the winners.  Our favorite entry this year comes in the Romance Category, and was crafted--no, hewn--by Dan Winters, of Los Altos Hills, California:

Sex with Rachel after she turned fifty was like driving the last-place team on the last day of the Iditarod Dog Sled Race, the point no longer the ride but the finish, the difficulty not the speed but keeping all the parts moving in the right direction, not to mention all that irritating barking.

Irritating, indeed!  But still, no where near as good as our all-time favorite, "crafted" by the winner in 2003, Mariann Simms, of Wetumpka, Alabama:

They had but one last remaining night together, so they embraced each other as tightly as that two-flavor entwined string cheese that is orange and yellowish-white, the orange probably being a bland Cheddar and the white . . . Mozzarella, although it could possibly be Provolone or just plain American, as it really doesn't taste distinctly dissimilar from the orange, yet they would have you believe it does by coloring it differently.